Thought Catalog


32 Tweets That Perfectly Sum Up Your Shock At That Season Premiere of How To Get Away With Murder

Posted: 24 Sep 2015 08:35 PM PDT

How To Get Away With Murder
How To Get Away With Murder

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The Horrifying Reality Behind 20 Popular Urban Legends

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 11:08 AM PDT

(YouTube)
(YouTube)

1. Bunny Man

Legend: Since the early 1970s, rumors have spread in the Washington, DC area that a man in a bunny costume randomly attacks strangers with an axe, most commonly under a Virginia overpass known as “Bunny Man Bridge.”

Reality: The legend is based on two documented incidents in Burke, VA right before Halloween 1970.

In the first incident, a couple was parked in a field near midnight when they heard something moving near their car. The car’s passenger’s-side window was suddenly smashed, and outside the window appeared a man in a bunny costume who told them, “You’re on private property and I have your tag number.” While fleeing in their car, they noticed that a hatchet was on the passenger’s-side floor.

The second incident was ten days later. A security guard approached an unfinished home and noticed a man in a bunny costume. When Bunny Man noticed the man approaching, he began swinging a long axe at the home’s porch and said, “All you people trespass around here. If you don’t get out of here, I’m going to bust you on the head.”

There were dozens of reported “Bunny Man” sightings after this first pair, but these were the only two confirmed incidents. “Bunny Man” has never been found. (source)

beetlejuice

2. Waking Up In the Morgue

Legend: A person is declared dead, their toe is tagged, and they’re zipped up in a body bag and placed into a cold morgue drawer, only to awake in claustrophobic darkness and realize to their horror that they’ve falsely been pronounced dead.

Reality: In 2011, an 80-year-old LA woman named Maria de Jesus Arroyo was declared dead of cardiac arrest, zipped up in a bag, and placed in a morgue drawer. When funeral home workers came to pick up her body, though, they found it lying face-down on the refrigerator chamber. She was covered in cuts and bruises, the bag was half-unzipped, and she had a broken nose—none of these injuries were visible when she’d first been placed in the morgue. It is suspected that all the injuries had been self-inflicted after she regained consciousness and that the true cause of her demise had been freezing to death in the morgue. (source)

beetlejuice

3. Buried Alive

Legend: A staple of horror fiction and urban legend is the tale of a person who is either purposely buried alive as a means of torture or accidentally buried alive because they were presumed dead.

Reality: Purposeful “premature burial” of living subjects has been a war tactic used by the Japanese and Germans in WWII as well as the ruthless communist regimes of Mao Zedong in China and the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia.

In 2011 in Russia, a 25-year-old mother was Tasered by her boyfriend, who allegedly felt she wasn’t pretty enough for him. She was then bound, gagged, placed into a box, and buried in a shallow grave that was covered with dirt and an 85-pound tree branch. But she managed to remain silent during the ordeal and bravely wriggled free within an hour. (source)

beetlejuice

4. Slender Man

Legend: A slim, tall, faceless man in a suit randomly terrorizes children and others.

Reality: Unlike most of the other cases here, this is an instance of life imitating art. In other words, the legend was not based on a real incident, but a real incident resulted from the legend. In 2014, a pair of 12-year-old Wisconsin girls, apparently believing that Slender Man was real, allegedly sought to appease him by murdering another 12-year-old girl. They reportedly lured their prey into the forest and left her for dead with 19 stab wounds. According to 12-year-old criminal defendant Morgan Geyser, “It was weird that I didn’t feel remorse.” (source)

beetlejuice

5. Frozen Woman

Legend: A woman falls unconscious outside in frigid weather, is frozen solid, then miraculously thaws out and comes to life again.

Reality: In 1981, a 19-year-old North Dakota woman named Jean Hilliard fell unconscious in 22-below-zero temperatures and froze to the point where she was stiff “like a piece of meat out of deep freeze.” She was rushed to a hospital, where the attending physician described her as “frozen stiff, literally.” Her body was so frozen that a hypodermic needle failed to pierce her skin. Yet she eventually thawed out, resumed consciousness, and recovered fully. The doctor described it as a “miracle.” (source1) (source2)

beetlejuice

6. Dead Body Under the Bed

Legend: Tenants at a motel complain that their room has an unbearable smell, only to discover that a rotting corpse is lodged underneath their bed.

Reality: Gruesomely enough, there are several real-life instances of this occurring: in New Jersey in 1982 and 1999, Maryland in 1987, New York in 1988, Virginia in 1989, California in 1996, Missouri in 1993, and two different cases in Florida in 1994. (source)

beetlejuice

7. Dead Body at the Bottom of the Pool

Legend: Due to either negligence or cloudy pool water, lifeguards and swimmers fail to notice that a corpse lies at the bottom of the public pool’s deep end.

Marie Joseph (left). (YouTube)
Marie Joseph (left). (YouTube)

Reality: In 2011, a nine-year-old boy in Massachusetts tried notifying lifeguards that an adult woman named Marie Joseph had sunken underwater without coming back up. One lifeguard informed the boy that she was on break, while another lifeguard reassured him that they’d be doing a pool check in a minute or two. While people continued swimming in the pool’s cloudy water, it wasn’t until nearly two days later that the corpse of Marie Joseph was found lying at the bottom of the pool’s deep end. (source)

beetlejuice

8. Green Man

Raymond Robinson, the real-life
Raymond Robinson, the real-life "Green Man." (Wikimedia Commons)

Legend: For decades in Western Pennsylvania, rumors spread that late at night, someone known as “The Green Man” or “Charlie No-Face” could be spotted walking alone down country roads.

Reality: During an electrical accident when he was only eight years old, Raymond “Ray” Robinson lost both his eyes, his nose, an ear, and his arm, rendering him so disfigured that he only ventured outside for walks late at night where he wouldn’t scare people or be ridiculed by them. His skin had been so disfigured by the childhood accident, it was said to have a sickly green glow. Although he may have inadvertently frightened those who came upon him late at night, he terrorized no one and in reality was often bullied and tormented by townsfolk. (source)

beetlejuice

9. Man Wakes Up With His Kidney Stolen

Legend: A tourist visits an exotic locale, befriends a stranger at a bar, goes back with them to a motel, then is knocked unconscious. They awake with a searing pain in their side—the result of a stolen kidney—and a note telling them to go to the hospital if they want to remain alive.

Reality: In 2008, a “kidney racket” was uncovered in India where this allegedly mythological practice was standard operating procedure among a criminal cartel that specialized in robbing poor people of bodily organs and selling them to rich people.

According to one of the verified victims, Saleem Muhammad:

When I woke up after several hours, I felt a pain in my right side….The men said, ‘We have removed your kidney, and you better not breathe a word about it.’ My life broke into pieces when I heard that. (source)

beetlejuice

10. Body Rolled Up In Carpet

Legend: People either find or purchase a rolled-up floor carpet, only to discover a corpse once they unroll it.

Reality: In 1984, three students at Columbia University picked up a carpet from a Manhattan sidewalk, only to find upon returning home that the cadaver of a dead black male with two bullet wounds in his head had been wrapped inside the carpet. A similar case occurred with a rolled-up gym mat in Georgia in 2013. (source1) (source2)

beetlejuice

11. Penis Stuck in the Pool Drain

Legend: A man attempts to have sex with a pool drain, only to lose his penis.

Reality: Although he didn’t lose his penis—only his dignity—a 33-year-old man in Florida was found attempting to penetrate his motel’s swimming-pool drain in the middle of the night. The pool’s pump was turned off in attempts to rescue him, but his penis had become so swollen during his attempts to make love to the pool drain that it took over forty minutes to extricate him from the algae-ridden drain hole and rush him to the hospital. (source)

beetlejuice

12. The Elevator-Door Guillotine

Legend: Attempting to rush in or out of an elevator while the doors are closing, a person gets trapped and is decapitated.

Reality: In 2014, young Russian mother Olga Tilinina became wedged between the doors of an old Soviet-era elevator and was decapitated while her two-year-old son watched in horror. (source)

beetlejuice

13. Hanging Halloween Surprise

Legend: What is thought to be a hanging Halloween display is actually a hanging human body.

Reality: In 2005 right before Halloween, a 42-year-old Delaware woman hanged herself, but for hours passersby assumed it was merely a Halloween decoration. In California in 2009, passersby assumed the same about a suicide victim whose body was slumped over a porch chair. And in Michigan in 2001, a teenager working at a haunted house accidentally hanged himself to death while trying to frighten customers. (source1) (source2) (source3)

beetlejuice

14. Maggot Brain

Legend: An insect enters a person’s ear, lays eggs, and the victim endures untold horrors as the eggs begin to hatch. This was terrifyingly captured in an episode of Rod Serling’s Night Gallery where a tourist in Borneo is tormented after an earwig enters his ear canal.

Reality: After vacationing in Peru in 2013, a British tourist began hearing scratching sounds inside her head and awoke at home to find that fluid had leaked out onto her pillow. Doctors found a “writhing mass of maggots” inside her ear that they feared would eventually make their way into her brain. (source)

beetlejuice

15. Halloween Candy Tampering

Ronald Clark O'Bryan (Harris County Police Department)
Ronald Clark O'Bryan (Harris County Police Department)

Legend: A neighborhood sadist either laces children’s Halloween candy with poison or places razor blades or needles in their treats.

Reality: Despite the ubiquity of this legend, there is only one documented case of a person purposely poisoning Halloween candy. In 1974, a Texas man named Ronald Clark O’Bryan, hoping to collect on an insurance policy, laced his son’s Pixy Stix with cyanide, killing him. (source)

beetlejuice

16. Waking Up During Surgery

Legend: A patient resumes consciousness during surgery, only to realize to their horror that they are still unable to move or scream.

Reality: During a 2007 autopsy in Venezuela, 33-year-old Carlos Camejo woke up in a morgue in “unbearable” pain as examiners were slicing into his face. (source1)

In 2005 during an operation to remove her eyeball, Carol Weihrer regained consciousness but was still too paralyzed to notify physicians that she was awake:

In my mind, I was screaming at the top of my voice. I thought I should have flown off the table with all the effort I was making. I was praying. I was doing everything I could. I was willing to sell my soul to get off that table. (source2)

beetlejuice

17. There's a Woman in Your Cupboard

Surveillance footage of 58-year-old Tatsuko Horikawa climbing down from the cupboard she called home for over a year. (YouTube)
Surveillance footage of 58-year-old Tatsuko Horikawa climbing down from the cupboard she called home for over a year. (YouTube)

Legend: There are various legends along the theme of “You Are Not Alone” in which a house-dweller notices items missing or rearranged but doesn’t realize that someone else has been inhabiting their abode the whole time.

Reality: In 2008, suspicious because he noticed that items in his apartment had been moved around and food was often missing from his refrigerator, a Japanese man set up a surveillance camera. Footage revealed a 58-year-old homeless woman descending from a cupboard in which she’d lived on a tiny futon for over a year. (source)

beetlejuice

18. Man Calls Hooker & It's His Daughter

Legend: There are various urban legends involving a man seeking services from a sex worker, only to realize it’s his wife or a relative.

Reality: In 2008, a Zimbabwean man named Titus Ncube ordered a prostitute to his motel room, only to find that the woman who showed up was his 20-year-old daughter. (source)

beetlejuice

19. PCP Cannibal

Big Lurch. (Wikimedia Commons)
Big Lurch. (Wikimedia Commons)

Legend: Since PCP, also known as “Angel Dust,” first emerged in popular culture during the late 1970s, there have been various unsubstantiated tales of its users losing their minds and resorting to cannibalism.

Reality: In 2002, a rapper named Big Lurch was found naked in the streets of LA and staring at the sky. It turned out that he’d been on a PCP binge for days and had murdered his 21-year-old female roommate and ate parts of her body. In 2009 in Bakersfield, CA, a four-year-old boy told investigators “my daddy ate my eyes.” His father, Angel Vidal Mendoza, was arrested and suspected of carrying the act out while under the influence of PCP. (source1) (source2)

beetlejuice

20. Congratulations—Now You Have AIDS

Legend: Ever since the AIDS crisis emerged in the mid-1980s, there have been rumors of people being approached in crowded clubs, feeling a minor pinch, and then having someone whisper in their ears that they are now a member of the “AIDS club.”

Reality: Although there are several documented cases of “pin prick attacks” where people deliberately jabbed their victims with syringes in an attempt to infect them with HIV, the sole documented case where someone actually came down with AIDS and died occurred in Australia in 1990 when a prison inmate jabbed a guard with a needle. The guard died of AIDS-related complications seven years later. (source) TC mark

‘I Had Sex With A Banana’ And 11 Other Weird Ways Men Got Themselves Off As Teenagers

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 01:22 PM PDT

Shutterstock / PrinceOfLove
Shutterstock / PrinceOfLove

1. BANANA-PEEL RENDEZVOUS

"As an intensely dumb and horny male teen, I was constantly masturbating. It was so bad, I was literally in pain if I wasn't busy pleasuring myself. I've jacked off with every grocery item and household contraption you can imagine, but for me the most pleasurable method was to peel a banana, warm it for seven seconds in a microwave—exactly seven seconds, no more, no less—wrap the banana peel around my member, and then close my eyes and pretend it was a woman…rather than, you know, a banana peel that I, in my loneliness, had just microwaved."

—Todd, 25
beetlejuice

2. ANAL SCREWDRIVER INSERTION

"One late summer night when I was about 14, I stuck most of a screwdriver up my rectum. Not the plastic handle end—the steel end. Flathead, not Phillips. I just jiggled it around and took it out. Then I continued jerking off. You're the only person I've ever told this to. You're also the only person I ever will tell this to, and if you publish my real name I'll stick a screwdriver up your ass, too."

—Kyle, 25
beetlejuice

3. PB&J

"Both of my parents worked, so when I'd call in sick from high school I had the whole house to myself. One day while futzing around in our house—it was probably two in the afternoon and I was still in my pajamas, just in case you want to get a picture of how relaxed I was—I blazed some chronic and got a massive case of the munchies. One PB&J sandwich…two…by the time I got to the third one, I'd already had a couple glasses of milk, too, so I was already feeling full and bloated. So I fucked the third sandwich instead. Came in it, too. Then I fed the whole sandwich to my dog. Is that wrong?"

—Tito, 24
beetlejuice

4. THE ‘NUMB PALM’ TRICK

"I used to like to sit on my ‘masturbation hand’ until it fell asleep, then jerk off with it. Totally weird sensation. Feels like someone else is jerking you off. So I’d close my eyes and pretend it was this girl I had a crush on. Then the blood would eventually flow back into my hand and I’d realize to my dismay that I was just masturbating again."

—Erik, 28
beetlejuice

5. TOILET-PAPER ROLL

"I'm a little thick—not in the head, but I mean girth-wise down there—so as a randy young buck with testosterone coursing through my veins with the ferocity of white-water rapids, I tested various household items that could accommodate my thickness with just enough tension to make it pleasurable, but not so much tension that my dick turned purple and fell off. I found that toilet-paper rolls were the perfect thickness. I'd lube up with whatever was handy—usually Eucerin—and then push and tug and shove until I was all the way in the roll and out the other end. Then I'd pump on myself with the greasy toilet-paper roll until I achieved completion. Ah, youth."

—Mark, 33
beetlejuice

6. MY OTHER HAND

"I'm left-handed. I do nearly everything with my left hand, including jerking off. You could pretty much saw off my entire right arm and I wouldn't even notice for a few weeks. But one day in my mid-teens, hot as fuck outside and bored out of my brains, I noticed an exotic stranger lurking in the East. That ‘stranger’ was my right hand. To this day, that stranger remains one of my very best and closest friends."

—Kevin, 22
beetlejuice

7. HOT MUD BATH

"This is really horrible, and I think I'm probably going to some sort of hell for it, but back as a teenager I visited a natural hot-springs spa in California's wine country. This particular place also had hot mud baths, which is basically you immersing yourself in a nice warm mud-filled tub with a consistency so thick, you never sink to the bottom. I soon discovered that the mud was also the consistency of a human vagina. Let's just say I left a part of myself in that mud bath that day, and I'm truly sorry to whomever rented it next. You're probably better off not knowing that you swam among my tadpoles."

—Billy, 30
beetlejuice

8. CANINE BLOWJOB FAIL

"There were all these websites that claimed women frequently would smear peanut butter on their pussies, and then they'd get off by inviting their dog to lick it off. So I dipped my hard dick in a big deep jar of Skippy. The crunchy kind, not the creamy kind. Then I sashayed on over to family pet, a huge lovable female Rottweiler. She took a sniff, then just looked up at me like I should be ashamed of myself."

—Tommy, 28
beetlejuice

9. MY MOM'S VIBRATOR ON MY BALLS

"I can't really say I was happy to discover that my mom—she raised me herself, my dad skipped town when I was very young—hid a vibrator under her mattress. It freaked me out and continues to freak me out even today. But one day when mom was at the mall, I grabbed that vibrating little purple love stick and held it up against my balls while I milked myself to completion. Sorry, mom."

—Morgan, 23
beetlejuice

10. A RAW CORNISH HEN

"You ever see those Cornish hens? They're like mini-chickens. Well, one day I peeked into the refrigerator and saw that my mom was thawing a few of them out for a dinner party. I grabbed one, took it upstairs, shoved my cock into where you're supposed to put the stuffing, and fucked the living shit out of that Cornish hen."

—Johnny, 24
beetlejuice

11. JACUZZI JET ON MY ASSHOLE

"My friends always used to joke that I might be the only guy in history ever to work as a motel ‘maid,’ but that's what I did for a summer job between junior and senior year of high school, which is really any young man's Prime Masturbating Time. Well, one slow day after I'd cleaned up the few rooms that had been rented the previous night, I took a dip in the motel Jacuzzi all by myself. I looked around, whipped it out, and went to town. I felt a pleasurable sensation down near my butt and realized that my anus was pretty much making out with the motel Jacuzzi jet. Orgasm was extra intense. 10/10 would use my anus to make out with a Jacuzzi jet again."

—Geoff, 26
beetlejuice

12. WATCHING MYSELF JERK OFF ON MY WEBCAM

"My favorite masturbation pastime as a teenager was to sit up close to my laptop, turn on Skype preferences so you can see a video of yourself, and jerk off to the live-action image of me jerking off. What can I say? I'm a narcissist, I guess. Still, I came every time."

—Fred, 29 TC mark

Viola Davis, Pope Francis, And America – The Land Of Dreams And Opportunity

Posted: 24 Sep 2015 02:49 PM PDT

YouTube / FOX
YouTube / FOX

The United States is known both home and away as the “land of opportunity.” But the ideology of the American Dream extends far beyond the country’s borders.

The most important export the United States has is its culture. This includes popular culture in everything from music to dance to clothing, as well as political culture, with notions of democracy and capitalism and freedom, all defined in the American way.

On Sunday night, Viola Davis became the first Black woman to win an Emmy for best actress in a drama series for her role as Annalise Keating in How To Get Away With Murder. It was a moment of celebration for her and for many Black women on television, past and present.

“The only thing that separates Women of Color from anyone else is opportunity.”

It was also a moment of reflection in which Davis so beautifully and accurately pointed out something the country needs to hear, and perhaps more often: “The only thing that separates Women of Color from everyone else is opportunity.”

Just a week ago, Matt Damon’s failed commentary on diversity with Effie Brown present, was a topic of public discussion. So the reiteration of the need for opportunity for specific groups who have faced disenfranchisement at all levels, could not have come at a more perfect time.

Davis was not the only Black woman who won that night. Uzo Aduba and Regina King were also Emmy winners on Sunday, and the importance of all these Women of Color winning is not to make them tokens. But rather, it is to point out the reality of Davis’ words, and especially one – opportunity. If Women of Color, if People of Color, if people in disenfranchised communities are afforded opportunity, achievement is made possible.

Opportunity, at least equal opportunity, despite the political attachments to notions of fairness and equality and the right to dream, continues to be more an ideal of the American imagination than a reality of the country itself. This is also true of many nation-states that currently exist. The difference is no other nation-state currently exports its culture the way the United States does. Perhaps that is why no other nation receives as much expectation for accountability as this one does.

"Let us seek for others the same possibilities which we seek for ourselves."

In Pope Francis’ address to Congress, he discussed the political ideology of the United States the world is accustomed to: The idea of liberty, of freedom, and the country being one of dreams for many – especially immigrants. But the Pope makes it abundantly clear that he believes this dream is yet to be accomplished.

In his speech, the Pope advocates for vulnerable groups in society, touching on immigrants and the poor specifically. But most powerfully, he proclaims, "Let us seek for others the same possibilities which we seek for ourselves." Aware of the inequities of the world at large, and referencing unjust systems in this part of the world, the Pope calls for sensible legislation to achieve his dream of a more fair world.

beetlejuice

There will be many things said of both Viola Davis’ and Pope Francis’ words. The implications of their words for the communities they reference, and the America each knows at large will be discussed; both these cultural moments have become/will become sites of political conversation. But the conversations of both people are ultimately about a culture that can be made into more than what it is – a place that can live up to its ideals.

My comparison between these two seemingly separate cultural and political conversations with two seemingly different public figures may come across as unusual. But it is a testament to my reality as a Nigerian-born third-culture kid; a Black girl who came to this country at sixteen going on seventeen, a practicing Catholic, and a multiculturalism scholar whose interests often center on race and culture.

Whether it is in telling more stories of Women of Color on screens, or changing economic and political systems to aid the most vulnerable in all groups of society, this culture of hopes and dreams can come to fruition.

But perhaps included in all the above-mentioned identities is a belief that cannot neatly be summarised or conceived. And here it is: I know and understand the myth of meritocracy in the American imagination. But I still very much want to believe that this country, for all its imperfections, is still a place where hopes and dreams can be made possible. And because hopes and dreams can be made possible, opportunities are also created for their fulfillment.

It is easy to be cynical and hopeless with how little things sometimes seem to change. But these dreams and hopes aren’t ones that you can have when you’re cynical and hopeless. They also aren’t ones you ought to have without working for practical means to achieve them.

Whether it is in telling more stories of Women of Color on screens, or changing economic and political systems to aid the most vulnerable groups in society, this culture of hopes and dreams can manifest in a way that is meaningful and pertinent for more; for all.

This land of opportunity that remains more ideal than reality, can come to exist. If we try and we keep trying because this dream is only made possible if we also do. And then too, lands of opportunity can dare to exist elsewhere, from their own doing. But also because of that great American export – culture. TC mark

21 Women Share How They Really Feel About The Idea Of A Threesome With Their Boyfriend

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 01:38 PM PDT

via twenty20/jameswildexo
via twenty20/jameswildexo

1. “I’ve actually been in four threesomes. Three were with two bisexual men (one was my man at the time) and one was with a boyfriend who was straight and a mutual friend of ours. I’m personally open to it (obvs) but in my experience it works better with bisexual men. The threesome with my straight ex was reeeeeeally awkward because he was intimidated by our partner despite it being my boyfriend’s idea. I don’t blame him now and I didn’t blame him at the time but it became an elephant in the room in that particular relationship.”

—Janice, 32

beetlejuice

2. “My college boyfriend wanted to have a threesome with me and my bestie at the time but it was too much for me and I’m not really into women at all. When I said no he said I was ‘repressed’ and then just a few weeks later I caught him cheating which shouldn’t have been a surprise at all. Dude was just a dog trying to get laid as often as possible.”

—Cindy, 28

beetlejuice

3. “To be perfectly honest, I’m really not into the idea and if a boyfriend seriously suggested it rather than just saying something he thought was dirty or whatever then I’d give serious thought to whether my relationship with him was going anywhere.”

—Michelle, 25

beetlejuice

4. “I’m not into other girls so much but I actually have fantasized about being with my boyfriend and another man before. I’d be open to it as long as I knew the guy and found him attractive.”

—Zoe, 23

beetlejuice

5. “I’m only into the idea of a threesome if I’m the third person with a couple and they’re strangers I don’t ever have to see again but I wouldn’t want to have one with the guy I care about.”

—Sadie, 26

beetlejuice

6. “Not that my boyfriend would ever ask me this but I don’t want anyone in our sexy times that isn’t either him or me. I’m not into other people or I’d be with them and this isn’t a fantasy either of us have ever had.”

—Katherine, 22

beetlejuice

7. “Aren’t threesomes things that boring couples do try to compensate for how boring they are and spice up their lame sex lives by trying to introduce someone who isn’t boring? I’d say no and I’d dump him for too boring to figure out how to be satisfied with me.”

—Ella, 27

beetlejuice

8. “I’m straight, my boyfriend is straight too. If he wanted a threesome with another woman then I’d assume he just wanted to have sex with another woman. If he wanted to have a threesome with a man then I’d assume he had been secretly gay or bisexual the entire two years we’ve been dating. Both of these possibilities would be deal breakers for me.”

—Aria, 26

beetlejuice

9. “While I find the idea of being the center of attention for two hot guys awesome I’m not sure I think the reality would play out like the fantasy. My boyfriend and I are exclusive and I guarantee he wouldn’t be into sharing me with another man although might be open to a girl. Problem is, I’m not into girls.”

—Madison, 25

beetlejuice

10. “My boyfriend knows I’m bisexual with a preference for men but he’s also one of those rare guys who isn’t turned on by the thought of a hot girl on girl make out session. So, while I’d be cool with it if only to feel another woman’s body again I doubt that he’d be into it since there’s nothing in it for him. Honestly, that’s fine with me. Everybody has their own preferences and boundaries and you have to respect them.”

—Madelyn, 23

beetlejuice

11. “I’m bisexual and had a threesome with two guys (both good friends) in college on a lark when we were all drunk one night. The guys spent the entire time struggling to get hard in front of each other until we just sort of gave up. Talking with one of them later, he felt too vulnerable and I think some of that had to do with there being a size difference (it didn’t matter to me). Years later, after telling a boyfriend that I’d once had a threesome he suggested we have one with another girl which I was into but after going through all the issues that can come up re jealousy and stuff he begged off. Threesomes are best in casual relationships or for dedicated swingers imo.”

—Sophia, 30

beetlejuice

12. “As a woman who only dates casually or is in open relationships I’d probably be fine with this if it was the right person. It would probably need to be with someone I was crushing on though, not some rando from Craigslist.”

—Grace, 25

beetlejuice

13. “Had a threesome with a very serious boyfriend years ago that included another guy (at my boyfriend’s request) and it ended up that my boyfriend then had his first experience with another dude which was not something we’d talked about beforehand. Long story short, boyfriend was gay or bi with a pref for men. We broke up. Tears. Would not do again with anyone.”

—Lucy, 29

beetlejuice

14. “My boyfriend right after college wanted to have a threeway with me and one of my friends at the time. When I asked him why he didn’t have a good answer and it was transparent that he wanted to recreate some kind of porno scenario since he barely knew my friend. At that point I felt like he was objectifying both of us and I quit seeing him. In retrospect he was 100% a loser and probably would have been crushed when my friend and I spent more time with each other and he was left to watch.”

—Maria, 25

beetlejuice

15. “Current guy is a monster in the sack, good looking, and successful. If he wanted to be with another woman in a threesome I’m pretty sure I’d be crushed by feelings of insecurity. So, no, I don’t want to test that.”

—Callie, 25

beetlejuice

16. “It’s interesting, I had a threesome with a girlfriend and my boyfriend at the time when I was twenty and it was awkward and fun and memorable but now I don’t have any interest in it. I think it just speaks to how unserious a lot of college relationships are where you’re just trying people and things on to see how they work for you. At 27 it would be impossible to recreate that silly, naive atmosphere. Everything has a lot more weight now.”

—Audrey, 27

beetlejuice

17. “With a girl, maybe. With a guy, no.”

—Claire, 21

beetlejuice

18. “I was in one threesome about ten years ago with an older couple I actually met at a bar if you can believe it. I enjoyed it but I really enjoyed the anonymity and that it didn’t really effect my life at all. If a boyfriend asked me to be in a threesome of any kind with him I’d be extremely hesitant to say the least because our relationship would then have to live with that decision.”

—Jane, 26

beetlejuice

19. “I’m not definitely against the idea but it’s not like a top 10 fantasy of mine or whatever. I do wonder how it would change our relationship.”

—Sara, 25

beetlejuice

20. “As a girl who’s been cheated on in two different relationships, I’ll pass on letting my boyfriend have sex with another woman in front of me.”

—Denise, 22

beetlejuice

21. “I very likely would say no because threesomes can be really destructive, I think, if everyone’s not honest with one another. I’m no threesome veteran but I had a boyfriend (note I said ‘had’) in my mid-twenties who wanted to have a threesome with a friend of his who was supposedly super hung. I went for it because he seemed to really want it. It was fun initially but my boyfriend got insecure about the size difference which was pretty big and even though that didn’t matter much to me it was the only thing that mattered to him and he became extremely insecure sexually despite me reassuring him endlessly. We broke up later but I think our relationship was actually destroyed half way through that threesome. They’re not for thin-skinned.”

—Jamie, 29 TC mark

16 Quotes That Perfectly Explain The Desire To Pack Your Bags And Get Away From It All

Posted: 24 Sep 2015 07:58 AM PDT

mrvalography
mrvalography

1.

"I've been homesick for countries I've never been, and longed to be where I couldn't be." – John Cheever


2.

“I heard an airplane passing overhead. I wished I was on it.” – Charles Bukowski


3.

"Wanderlust, the very strong or irresistible impulse to travel, is adopted untouched from the German, presumably because it couldn't be improved upon. Workarounds like the French passion du voyage don't quite capture the same meaning. Wanderlust is not a passion for travel exactly; it's something more animal and more fickle – something more like lust. We don't lust after very many things in life. We don't need words like worklust or homemakinglust. But travel? Anatole Broyard put it perfect in his essay Being There: Travel is like adultery: 'One is always tempted to be unfaithful to one's own country. To have imagination is inevitably to be dissatisfied with where you live…in our wanderlust, we are lovers looking for consummation.'" – Elisabeth Eaves


4.

"I always wonder why birds choose to stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth, then I ask myself the same question." – Harun Yahya


5.

"People travel to wonder at the height of the mountains, at the huge waves of the seas, at the long course of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars, and yet they pass by themselves without wondering." – St. Augustine


6.

"There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep on rolling under the stars." – Jack Kerouac


7.

"We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls." – Anaïs Nin


8.

"You don't choose the day you enter the world and you don't chose the day you leave. It's what you do in between that makes all the difference." – Anita Septimus


9.

"Traveling is like flirting with life. It's like saying, 'I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station.'" – Lisa St. Aubin de Teran


10.

"The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page." – Saint Augustine


11.

"Once in a while it really hits people that they don't have to experience the world in the way they have been told to." – Alan Keightley


12.

"Never did the world make a queen of a girl who hides in houses and dreams without traveling." – Unknown


13.

"I'd rather be in the mountains thinking about God, then in church thinking about the mountains." – Ace Kravhl


14.

"Through travel I first became aware of the outside world; it was through travel that I found my own introspective way into becoming a part of it." – Eudora Welty


15.

"He who has seen one cathedral ten times has seen something; he who has seen ten cathedrals once has seen but little; and he who has spent half an hour in each of a hundred cathedrals has seen nothing at all." – Sinclair Lewis


16.

"Arriving at each new city, the traveler finds again a past of his that he did now know he had: the foreignness of what you no longer are or no longer possess lies in wait for you in foreign, unpossessed places." – Italo Calvino TC mark

Why Our Loss Shouldn’t Be A Game Of ‘Who Has It Worse’

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 01:23 PM PDT

RobinDuPont
RobinDuPont

“I mean, what I experienced, you know, it’s not nearly as bad as what he went through,” I catch myself saying to a friend. We’re sitting at Sunday brunch, plowing through Mimosas as if our lives depended on it, and she’s asking about a former lover of mine.

I quickly interject, “Please, you know how I feel about the word lover. It’s like moist. Gross.”

I’m comparing the loss of my father to what a man from my past experienced, his own losses and how they stacked up against mine. I don’t even realize I’m doing this — a sick game of Trauma Olympics. And of course, he wins. He wins! And I’m fully admitting it! He lost more than I did, in much more tragic ways. So, I use this as an explanation for his behavior, and why certain things transpired the way they did.

But this thinking, it doesn’t feel very good. It feels like I’m both glorifying his grief and minimizing my own. As if I need to put a disclaimer in front of my own pain. “Yes, my dad died, but his situation was far worse…”

I’m not sure why so many of us do this. Whether it’s the ease of technology and how many heartbreaking stories we can click on within seconds, or if we’ve always been placing our specific hurt into categories of bearable, moderate, and immense, it doesn’t seem like it’s doing us any good.

Sure, if you jump in and say, “I totally get it. My fish died yesterday!” after someone opens up about their brother’s suicide, you’re being pretty damn inconsiderate (and also just dumb??).

But in most cases, I think we’re all too quick to qualify which pain is valid. Which pain is worthy of speaking about. Which pain is true pain.

The things is, pain is such a unifying experience. It’s one of the guaranteed parts of being human. You will love and you will lose. Sometimes, the sun is shining and it’s so bright you need those trendy sunglasses of yours. And others? It’s so dark, you’re not sure your eyes will ever adjust. That’s just how it works. It comes and it goes.

And not to diminish those difficult times, but they aren’t fully unique experiences either. Will anyone fully understand how you are feeling? No. And even though that can often feel very scary and isolating, it should also be a bit freeing. You don’t need to compare yourself to others. You don’t need to grieve the same way as your friend, your family members, random strangers you read about on Humans of New York.

I remember speaking to a teenage girl once about her heartbreak. She was very modest in her pain, afraid to really talk about it, always undermining it with a sentence like, “I know it’s just dumb high school stuff.” And it made me hurt for her. Because I know someone must have told her, “This isn’t a big deal.”

And she believed it. She believed her feelings weren’t as important. She believed her heartache wasn’t as real as other “flashy” pain.

When we turn our specific moments of vulnerability, hurt, pain, loss into chess pieces to play against one another, THAT’S when we really lose. It shouldn’t be a competition. And no one should make you feel as if you aren’t feeling “real pain.” That’s just selfish. And rather conceited, too.

You are allowed to feel. You are allowed to hurt. You are allowed to experience your loss without throwing out a disclaimer. And anyone who tries to get you to play this: “Who has it worse?” game is not respecting your journey. Wish them well, and move forward. Don’t waste your time or energy. TC mark

The 8 Types Of Drunk People You And Your Friends Have Been At Least Once

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 01:21 PM PDT

Twenty20 / kristel.limbo
Twenty20 / kristel.limbo

1. The Fighter

Whether you’re attending a night out on the town or maybe even your little cousin’s 10th birthday party, if there’s booze, The Fighter drunk will find a way to draw blood. There’s no stopping them. Somewhere inside of these people there exists a real-life hulk whose childhood angst must be played out over and over again across the canvas of present time. The paint? Blood red. The brush? Fists. The end result? A masterpiece of bruised friendships, hospital bills, and the occasionally tight pair of handcuffs.

The Fighter drunk fights because they must fight, because they haven’t yet had to courage to sit down with a good therapist. And even when they aren’t directly involved in a physical conflict, they’ll cheer one on just to amuse themselves, to satisfy that nameless primal lust for bone crushing chaos. This doesn’t mean to say that Fighter drunks aren’t a good time, but you’d better be prepared to join the brawl, get beat down, or spend the night in jail if you want to party with these guys.

2. The Drama Queen

Before the night even begins, there’s a backstory you don’t know about, which later makes the yelling and screaming difficult to understand. Unbeknownst to members of the outing, The Drama Queen drunk is already involved in a complex web of social espionage that MUST and WILL be exposed just as soon as liquor can be secured within their bloodstream. Soon, all the lies, deceit, and contempt they’ve been holding inside for the past 10 years is going to crash into the room like a tsunami wave. I use the term “tsunami wave” with a keen sense of purpose in that storyline of the Drama Queen drunk will absolutely drown everyone and everything out. These kind of drunk people will consume the entire evening with lavish displays of crying, screaming, and arguing that would make the Maury Povich show look like damn monastery.

3. The Philosopher

No scientific nor metaphysical mystery is beyond the keen powers of this drunk to solve. Existentialism? You got it, bro. ALL. NIGHT. LONG.

The Philosopher drunk exploits the relaxing effect of alcohol in order to tune out their own lives and tune into something much bigger. What attention span they lack while sober, becomes infinitely large while under the influence. Are human beings the result of an extraterrestrial breeding program? Are the planets of our solar system merely the sub-atomic components of quantum mechanics? Why do they call it soy milk when it doesn’t come from animal organs? Doesn't that make it soy juice? Whatever the question, the Philosopher drunk has the answer. Whatever the doubt, they’ve got the theory.

4. The George (Washington)

Honesty has its merits to a point—that point being the threshold of obnoxiousness and just short of becoming a complete asshole. The George drunk has no concept of this and prefers to cross the lines of relevance and grace under the guise of “just saying.”

Prepare for the “should haves” and “if I were you” injections during a very uncomfortable segment of “you can’t get mad at me for telling the truth, bro.” Being honest in the best interest of others is one thing; borrowing the cover of alcohol as a means to air out your silent contempt for someone is another. By insisting that their honesty is indeed valuable stuff, The George unilaterally reserves the right to pass ill judgment against you while simultaneously coming to your rescue.

While The George can be annoying at best, they’re a reminder of something more sinister about the nature of truth-tellers, something the writers of history forgot to mention about the story of George Washington and that stupid cherry tree: it was all a lie.

5. The Flirty Whore

Do I even need to elaborate? We all know this one. And, most likely, we’ve all been this one at some point or another. The Flirty Whore drunk brings new meaning to the term “social butterfly” if butterflies drank alcohol — and were whores. Wings spread far and wide, this drunk will gravitate to anyone and anything that will pay them attention. And for those that do pay attention, they’re adorned with accolades of touching, eyeing, and a caliber of sexual flattery that could make even a celibate nun think she had a shot.

Known for their ability to be a social lubricant, Flirty Whore drunks usually don’t require any lubricant in the bedroom (but mostly because people generally try to avoid sleeping with them in the first place).

6. The Anarchist

Nothing says “I had a wild night” like jail time. The Anarchist always insists on shattering the rules of society — even when those rules have been signed into law. Trespassing on private property to go swimming in someone’s backyard? Piece of cake. Illegal gambling rings? Let’s do it. Steal a case of water from the maids’ supply room at the hotel? Just watch me. No crime is too petty and none carries too heavy a penalty for The Anarchist drunk, because if felony charges haven’t been filed, they didn’t party hard enough.

7. The Patient

Usually the more inexperienced drinker of the group, The Patient has trouble handling their alcohol beyond the skill level of a college freshman. It’s pathetic, really. Because every time you and your crew goes out drinking you warn them, “Don’t mix, and don’t get sick this time." And every time they tell you, “I’m cool." Well guess what? They’re not cool. Ever.

Handling your drinks like a newborn child doesn’t make you a badass drinker — it makes you a liability and a drag. Nobody works 45 hours a week to tie you a bib and make sure you don’t die in your sleep. When someone’s drinking skills haven’t matured to a level that avoids sleeping with a toilet bowl EVERY NIGHT they consume alcohol, everyone pays for it.

The Patient drunk is most immature and embarrassing drunk.

8. The Peacemaker

With every volatile — and potentially explosive — situation involving alcohol, there exists someone there to diffuse it. This is the Peacemaker drunk. The Peacemaker will say and do anything to soothe the tears, wounds, and social mayhem created by those around them. Their call to diffuse social fireworks does not come as a result of their compassion for others in pain, but rather, for the hope that just once they might enjoy an unspoiled night out. You see, the “peace” they seek to make, though it benefits others, is really for themselves. The Peacemaker is by far the most mature of drinkers and the likeliest of people to save your life.

Which drunk have you been lately? TC mark

14 Things Only People With A Partner Addicted To Social Media Understand

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 12:44 PM PDT

abbywilcoxphoto
abbywilcoxphoto

1. You hold their hand and tell them everything will be alright, and yes, actually, they are very interesting, anytime they put out a tweet or update and hardly anyone likes it. This is the kind of thing that truly bonds a modern couple.

2. When they realize their battery is dying you can literally see the panic come across their face as they horrifyingly have to think about what it will be like if they can’t get their emails and updates 24/7.

3. And if their phone does dies, depending on how long they have to go without being able to charge it, you know you have limited amount of time before anxiety/anger sets in. It’s basically like when someone hasn’t eaten in awhile, they’re on the verge of being hangry, and you know they need a candy bar or a breadstick asap if you want to have an enjoyable time with them. Basically the same thing.

4. They have a Spotify playlist for literally everything. Washing the dishes, drinking a bottle of wine together, running, having sex, whatever. They know the perfect songs to not only set the mood, but ANY mood.

5. They regularly have several screens open and on at one time, so it’s not that surprising when you say something and they don’t register what you’ve said at first. They regularly have the TV on and laptop open while also scrolling through Facebook or Instagram on their phone.

6. They want to take pics of everything all the time, even if the moment is completely mundane. They snap a pic and add captions like “Enjoying a relaxing evening watching a movie with bae <3 #TGIF” or “Out hiking with the love of my life!!! #nature #love” To them, any and every moment is prime time for a picture.

7. They regularly ask you about things they saw on Facebook or Twitter just assuming you must know what they’re talking about. “Can you believe David has another new job already? What is that, like the 3rd job in a year?” You’re like, uhm David who? “David from accounting!! Didn’t you see his update this morning?”

8. They talk about the followers they’ve lost and the people who have unfriended them like they’ve truly lost someone special. Even if half of those followers were bot Twitter accounts, you can tell it still hurts.

9. They spend more time in the bathroom than usual because sitting on the toilet is one of their favorite places to do all their social media scrolling. You’ve stopped asking them what they’re doing in there because you just know now.

10. When you guys go somewhere together your partner is immediately thinking about the kind of update they’re going to write on Facebook. They just have to let everyone know you two are having so much fun together!

11. You ask them to go camping or for a weekend retreat somewhere remote and the first thing they ask is, “Does it have wifi?” 

12. Their dating past mostly consists of people they met through social media. Someone slid through their DMs or commented enough on their Instagram and boom, a romance was born.

13. You’ve asked them if they’ve ever thought about deactivating their Facebook and they just look at you and laugh. When they realize you’re being serious they’re like, “wait, that’s not an actual thing people do, right?”

14. Some couples say I love you before bed and some couples help each other craft the perfect tweets before bed. TC mark

5 Ways To Know Through All Five Senses That You’ve Found The Right Guy

Posted: 23 Sep 2015 07:30 AM PDT

▲ r n o
▲ r n o

It's okay for a man to be macho (and cool) but he must be compassionate with his lady. A woman deserves to feel special and she should sense when she has found a man worthy of being introduced to her parents. Even if her dad is a bad ass, or thinks he's a bad ass.

1. See.

He is always excited to see you. He makes an effort to spend quality time with you because there is no substitute for communication. If you happen to be in a long distance relationship, it's natural to fall asleep sometimes while Skype is up and running. Four hours of sleep is not ideal, but he'll make the sacrifice because he really enjoys talking to you.

2. Hear.

He makes an effort to listen to your concerns because he understands the importance of being able to provide useful feedback. He is never too preoccupied to find out how your day went. You can feel free to let down your hair and express yourself without feeling self-conscious.

3. Touch.

On a special occasion, he takes you out to a restaurant that is exquisite. The ambience is breath-taking and the piped music is beautiful.The conversation is going great but there is still something missing. As he subtly reaches across the table, his fingers begin to flirt with your palm.

4. Smell.

He recognizes that you love the scent of flowers. At the store, he may not appreciate the smell of the three red roses that he just purchased but when he surprises you, he fully gets it. To see his lady glee with excitement warms his heart. After you momentarily close your eyes while inhaling your flowers, he can't wait for a hug and kiss.

5. Taste.

He is always willing to assist with the preparation of a home cooked meal. If he is incapable of boiling rice, then he makes up with excellent onion-chopping skills. He also understands that dishes don't automatically become immersed in soap and water. TC mark