Thought Catalog


13 Women Describe What Their Boyfriend’s Semen Tastes Like

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 07:02 PM PST

PROBiodiversity Heritage Library
PROBiodiversity Heritage Library

1. Fresh oysters

"I gawked a little the first time I tried it. It reminded me about the taste and feel of raw oysters, only a little more watery. There's also the pervasive taste of salt, which I really am not fond of. I don't know why it's so important to guys that you swallow, but every single one of them seems to enjoy it when you do. I guess it turns them on." — Kathryn, 26

2. Old pennies

"Every man seems to taste different. Sometimes very bitter, others are sweeter tasting. But most of the time there is always this lingering aftertaste of pennies in my mouth. Like really old pennies with an acidic taste to it. But you kinda get used to it." — Amanda, 20

3. Creamy chlorine cleanser

"My man's semen smells like cleaning products used for bleaching. I'd say it tastes like a creamy chlorine cleanser with a bleachy flavor. And it always leaves this really awkward taste at the back of my throat. No wonder why most women don't like it. Semen is something that is not worth tasting, unless you really love the guy." — Cassandra, 31

4. Black truffle

"Actually, I don't mind the taste of it. It's not that I love it, but I can live with it. It's just like a thick liquid with a salty taste to it. It somehow tastes like Black truffle." — Kirstie, 39

5. Balloons

"Do you remember that taste you had when you chewed on a balloon as a kid? That's exactly how my boyfriend's semen tastes like, only a lot saltier. I guess it's not that bad at all. It might not be for everyone, but you'll never know until you try." — Sophia, 20

6. Salty mushrooms

"My boyfriend's cum has an acidic and bitter taste most of the time. I always get the impression I have some salty and very thick liquid in my mouth that has a distinct flavour of mushrooms. It's nothing like I've ever tasted before, and the texture is also very unique." — Marsha, 22

7. Salty seawater

"During my time in college I've given a lot of head, so I know firsthand that flavors somewhat differ. It's not only that each man's semen tastes different, but also that the taste of one man can vary heavily. It depends on what they eat or drink. But if I had to pin it down to one common denominator, I'd say it always tastes like salty seawater. Sometimes it's really viscous and burns a little in the back of my throat. Other times it's a little sweet and not at all thick, but really watery." — Helena, 27

8. Soap

"Well, I wouldn't say semen tastes delicious or anything, but it's okay-ish. Sometimes it makes me feel icky, because it has this soapy off-taste to it. At the same time, it's not entirely repulsive either. Most guys enjoy it when a girl swallows, so I just do it and get on. And who says that the favor isn't returned?” — Sandra, 21

9. Slimy pool water

"It's like slimy pool water. The taste of semen can be really salty, with a slight flavor of chlorine mixed with sour apple. I guess it's because of the taste of chlorine that it makes me think I have slimy pool water in my mouth. Some say it's not bad for you, but I prefer to spit it out." — Eve, 25

10. Tasteless jibber

"Usually, there's no taste at all. I mean it's a little salty, a little bitter and sometimes a little sweet, but there's not much of a distinct flavor. Just like tasteless jibber. If a girl doesn't enjoy swallowing, she can just have her man pull out and come all over her. Another good idea is to get your boyfriend a swallow of his own if he is really obsessed with the idea of you swallowing." — Tasha, 22

11. Salty goo

"I'm convinced there are some chemicals in my husband's semen that get me really aroused. It's like an aphrodisiac to me. I just love every aspect of it, the warmth, the unique taste, really everything, even the smell. I even enjoy swallowing his cum. Some men have a really thick seminal fluid, others are more watery. Some of them really seemed to explode when they came, others just dribbled." — Victoria, 43

12. Bad sour cream

"My hubby's cum tastes really awful. Like sour cream that has gone bad. It also has this really awkward odor to it. The guys before him had an acceptable taste, sadly my man hasn't. I wish I could convince him to change his nutrition. But I don't think this will ever happen, so I just go without oral sex." — Jennifer, 37

13. Shampoo

"Personally, I really don't like the whole feel to it. It somehow tastes like salty shampoo, unlike anything I've ever tasted. Its texture is so awkward and slimy that I really try to avoid it as much as I can. My boyfriend has no problem with using a condom for a blow job. Lucky me, I guess." — Kathleen, 20 TC mark

What You Shouldn’t Be Afraid To Ask For

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 06:03 PM PST

You shouldn't wait by your phone. But you do, of course, and you even do that embarrassing thing where you check it every 30 or so seconds to make sure that they haven't written something (even though, obviously, you would have seen the screen light up if they had). You find yourself, more than you'd like to admit, in yet another situation where you have to wait for someone to give you the green light, to say they want you back, to be interested enough that your interest doesn't make you weird or desperate. There you are again, fearing seeming desperate at all costs, while behaving in the most desperate ways imaginable.

There is nothing worse than being the one who loves more, who needs more, whose emotions and tears and dreams run so close to the surface. Sometimes it feels as though a single pinprick could send it all streaming out, that you're always one bad text or unreturned call from breaking down completely, from letting out everything you've been being so good about pretending not to feel.

But the truth is that you don't have to be this way, your own insecurity and dependence on the approval of others isn't the price you have to pay to play the game. You are allowed to feel the pull of the phone next to you, but then to pick it up and say exactly what you want to say. There doesn't have to be something so scary about "hello," or even "I'm thinking of you." You are allowed to be the person who texts first, who texts back right away, who starts off the day with a "Good morning" and doesn't have to feel like it might have been too much.

Because, no matter how addictive they are – no matter how much they make you feel like you're getting better at a sport by learning how to communicate without bothering them – the people who leave you hanging aren't worth it. Even the little moments of affection they give you won't make you feel any better when you're by yourself again. You aren't ever going to convince them that you're worth getting excited over, and even if you could, would you really want to be with someone you had to negotiate your own worth to? Would you really want to spend years learning the exact right way to be so that they aren't annoyed by you?

Feeling things isn't annoying. Getting excited about someone you love (or are just starting to really like) doesn't make you weird. Wanting to reach out, to keep a conversation going, to ask them how they are, isn't too much. You don't need to pretend to be disinterested to be interesting. And love isn't a competition for who can seem like they need the other one less.

You shouldn't be afraid to ask for someone who's just as excited as you are, who can't wait to go on awesome adventures and learn all about this new person. You deserve to be someone's priority, if you're making them yours. And maybe this means that you'll have to wait longer, search harder, and be even more picky. But there has to be a moment when you prioritize yourself, when you stop being afraid of seeming too much like the person you are. You shouldn't be afraid of being what they call "needy," because when it comes to love and people in your life, it's okay to need. It's okay to not accept a three-day rule when it comes to calling you back. It's okay to want someone who isn't playing games, who wants to build something together (or doesn't, and tells you without dragging things out).

You shouldn't be afraid to ask for all of this, because it's not asking too much. It's not making ridiculous demands on the person you're seeing. Never let anyone convince you that modern love means saying only 20 percent of what you mean and making sure you always keep the upper hand. Never let anyone tell you that romance is dead, or that you can't expect people to just be open with you.

You can expect nearly anything, if you're willing to ask for it. TC mark

7 Pieces of Shoe Advice for Men From 434 Single Women

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 05:07 PM PST

Single women are really judgmental. And they need to be. They don't have all the time in the world to figure out if a guy is worth their time, so they've honed in on a few key things men do on first dates that are reliable indicators of their (lack of) fitness as potential mates. The one most often overlooked by men is what to wear; specifically shoes.

To get a more accurate sense of how women judge a guy's shoes on a first date, we surveyed 434 young, straight, single American women. We showed them 32 types of men's shoes—each a Zappos.com bestseller in its category. They covered almost everything a normal guy might wear on a date. We asked the women to imagine casual lunch dates with different guys wearing different shoes—and to rate what each shoe type says about the guy wearing them.

We got more than 110,000 individual ratings, and more than 2,000 write-in comments. The women showed very similar tastes, both in what they liked and what they loathed. Their preferences were strong, consistent, simple and—once we crunched all the numbers and analyzed all the comments—broke down into seven major insights that every single man could use going into their next first date.

1. WEAR SHOES THAT COVER YOUR FEET.

Women hated every single sandal we showed them—Crocs, Birkenstocks, KEENs, Nike slides, Reef flip-flops, it didn't matter. These all said, "I have no sense of style, I'm not interested in this date, I have contempt for you as a woman, I'm a lazy loser." One woman said "Oh God!" out loud when she saw these, and not in a good way. Unless your first date is at a hacky sack tournament or a nudist colony, women do not want to see your toes; they want your foot properly covered in a proper shoe.shoes

2. WEAR LEATHER SHOES.

Women like leather. The top seven shoes we showed had entirely leather uppers. The only shoes in the Top 14 that didn't were Vans and Converse All-Stars—the classic casual sneaker. By contrast, of the 10 lowest-rated shoes, seven were mostly plastic. There was nothing specifically appealing about leather, per se, it was more that leather shoes look nicer, which codes to women that you are at least making an effort. On the first date, that's all most women are looking for. So just wear the leather. Even if your date proves to be a vegan who morally disapproves of slaughtering a defenseless animal, skinning it and wrapping it around your feet, it's light years better than shoving your grubby bare toes in her face. And—bonus!—your leather may have saved you from a tedious, frigid relationship with a humorless killjoy.shoes2

3. WEAR NORMAL SHOES, NOT BOOTS.

Of our 12 top-rated shoes, only one was a boot (the Red Wing Iron Ranger, $300). Most of the boots scored in the middle of the rankings, including the Clarks chukkas, the Red Wing chukkas, the Timberlands, and the cowboy boots. You might think the boots are making you look manly, confident, protective and sexy, but most women don't see them that way. They're mostly just thinking "Meh, boots, whatever."

Of course, there are exceptions to this rule. There was a statistically significant strain of cowboy lust among our survey participants, for instance. The problem is that you're unlikely to know that about a woman before the first date, so you're better off just wearing normal shoes to be on the safe side.go

4. DON'T WEAR ATHLETIC SHOES.

Vans and Converse scored O.K., but they're more "stylish casual" sneakers than true tennis shoes or cross-trainers. The true athletic shoes—Merrell hiking shoes, Asics running shoes, Innov-8 minimalist cross-trainers, Brooks walkers, KEENs water-sports shoes, and FiveFingers Paleo-training shoes—all scored in the bottom half of the rankings. Women are just not impressed if you wear athletic shoes on a date.

For those of you who were considering wearing one of these shoes, we know you think they say, "I'm strong, fit and sexy." Well, they don't. You know what does? Your stomach, your jawline and the fit of your shirt over your chest, shoulders and arms—things you can't hide or fake with a pair of shoes that actually say, "I'm poor, have bad taste, don't respect you as a woman, and didn't care about getting myself together for this date."shies

5. DON'T SPEND A LOT.

Two of the three top-rated shoes in the survey cost less than $100: the Kenneth Cole Reaction Sim-Plicity ($98) and the Dockers Gordon ($50). In fact, 80 percent of the shoes we showed women cost less than $200. Shoe price correlated zero with overall rating, and only modestly with how much women thought the shoe cost. You don't have to break the bank when you're shopping for shoes. There are plenty of simple, classic, reasonably priced options that women find acceptable and appealing. Besides, on a first date women aren't looking to see how much you spend on yourself.screenshot-nyoobserver-wordpress-com-2015-09-11-15-18-50

6. STYLISH SHOES MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A MAN.

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Young men, especially, tend to worry that stylish shoes will make them look gay or feminine. Nothing could be further from the truth. Women rated the more stylish, dressy, leather shoes as more manly and masculine, and as making the guy look more sexually experienced, more mature, and better able to protect and defend them physically. In fact, the Kenneth Cole dressy Oxford ($98) was rated more manly than the Red Wing Heritage Iron Ranger combat-style boot ($300); the To Boot Winston stylish oxford ($375) was rated more manly than the Laredo Castle Rock cowboy boot ($125) and the Cole Haan Winter Saddle ($198) was rated more manly than the Red Wing Heritage Work chukka ($250). Remember, looking nice and put together is the outward expression of inner confidence. And for women, confidence is the manliest of masculine virtues.

7. WEAR SHOES THAT SHOW YOU MADE AN EFFORT.

Too many guys think looking cool and casual is the key to getting laid on the first date. As a result, American guys tend to under-dress, and wear shoes that are much too casual for a first date. In our survey, we described our hypothetical guy as wearing quality jeans and a casual shirt, for a weekend lunch date at a local restaurant, and even then women hardly ever complained that stylish shoes made a guy look over-dressed. In fact, women equate stylish shoes with, "This guy is interested in the date, respects me, wants to impress me, and is considerate, kind, and mature." You might think that dressing up for a date says "I'm desperate," but most women just think it means "I am confident, mature and bright enough to know that this is appropriate footwear for a real man to wear on a real date with a real woman." And real women find that very attractive.

Young single men, this advice from America's single women can help you put your best foot forward. Just do us a favor and don't put that foot in your mouth before the check comes. TC mark

Tucker Max and Geoffrey Miller are the authors of Mate: Become the Man Women Want.

14 Struggles Only Introverts Will Understand

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 04:00 PM PST

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Shutterstock

1. Feeling absent minded and just generally being “in your head” so much that often you forget to do the most basic life things. You often think you did things because you “did it in your head.” There’s a part of you that wishes you could just “hire someone” to do all the small, mundane day-to-day things you always forget to do.

2. It’s often difficult for you to be friends with an ex, especially if s/he dumped you. This was a person you trusted, someone you opened yourself up to fully.

3. You’re prone to thinking before talking. People wonder why you are always “so quiet” — that or they think you’re generally disinterested in conversation. It’s just not true.

4. And because you’re prone to think before you open your mouth you’re usually never the first person to speak in a class or group setting. People you work with for the first time think you have no ideas, that you’re not really doing the readings, that you’re not really there at all. You dread having to do group work when you know you’d be better figuring it out on your own.

5. Sometimes you don’t make a good first impression. You come across to new people as arrogant, snobbish, self-absorbed or full of yourself when the reality is that it is hard for you to open up to new people. It’s just that you need to warm up to them first.

6. When you decide to go out you always have to have an escape plan so you can bounce when you feel like it. But you worry that the people who invited you out will think you don’t like them or that you don’t want to hang around anymore. They are amazing, really, but you just want to hurry home so you can be in your own bed and watch your favorite shows on Netflix. You send them a text saying how much fun you had so they don’t think otherwise.

7. You’re a keen observer and you notice everything. You notice changes in your environment super quickly. You are sensitive to changes in patterns. But this is especially agonizing in a relationship because if your guy texts you less or if there’s any sudden change in his behavior you notice it right away. And then the overthinking kicks in.

8. You can’t do small talk, but you really enjoy deep, philosophical discussions.

9. You get frustrated really easily when people don’t see or do things your way.

10. Getting anything done — a project, a painting, a DJ mix, whatever you’re working on — means completely disappearing from society. You take yourself away and insulate yourself in the world of your project for long stretches of time. You know it won’t get finished otherwise.

11. You’re slow. You have a lot of great ideas. You’re imaginative and creatively exciting, but it always takes you forever to bring your ideas to life.

12. Having to deal with, “Are you OK?”

13. You work on things forever because it’s hard for you to let it go. Sometimes your own perfectionism gets in the way of you achieving your goals, but you know this about yourself already so you work hard to overcome it.

14. Having to explain to people that just because you’re an introvert doesn’t mean you don’t like people or that you’re not a social being. TC mark

5 Things I Think About Every Sunday Night

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 03:00 PM PST

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1. There's a weird grey area in friendship/acquaintanceship that is neither "nice person you barely know but see sometimes on Facebook" and "real friend you will make actual time to see/call/chat with." They're the people who you'll never actually forget about or delete, but they're also people with whom you'll maintain this long, somewhat draining relationship of radio silence punctuated by small talk-y conversations. But occasionally you guys will actually hang out and things will be great and you'll have an awesome time, so you will let the nonexistent friendship drag on for another year or so, until you cross paths again. These are often people who were great friends at one point, but who today are realistically no closer than the acquaintances you never really liked. Do these people eventually get invited to weddings? If so, yikes.

2. So much of having a relationship feels performative, like if you're not doing it the right way or in the way everyone wants you to, there is something lesser about it or you're somehow disappointing people. And yes you can always be like "Who cares what those people think?? All that matters is the two of you!" And that is true to an extent, but there are plenty of people who have really strong opinions you actually do care about. When parents, family, close friends, etc, all have something they think is "right" for you or a particular way they want you to perform your love, is it really the noble thing to be like "fuck 'em?" Our generation has a lot of loose social norms around things like marriage/weddings/kids, but at the same time, I want to stay aware of the fact that these things are bigger than just you. Where's the line between "kowtowing to the peanut gallery in your relationship" and "being considerate of the people who want to celebrate with you?"

3. I'm constantly torn between feeling like the internet is making us all smarter, more compassionate, and more aware of what's going on, and feeling like it's making us more and more embedded in our own little echo chambers. On the one hand, I am definitely surrounded by people who have an extremely nuanced understanding of subjects that I think are important to understand, and pretty much all of them agree on things that I feel shouldn't be negotiable. The level of conversation I see going on around me is definitely advanced and thoughtful. But by the same token, in my real life – and amongst even close friends – I realize that the idea that young people are all in agreement on, or aware of, a certain thing is just not true. I'm just almost never aware of them in my day-to-day, even less so as the years go on. It's consistently a shock when I'm at a party or something and realize that terms I use all the time online are known by like 6% of the population, even people who would vote for the same political candidates as me. And this isn't even counting the millions of people who don't agree with me in the slightest. I used to think there was something noble in deleting people on social media who would share what I thought were odious political/social opinions, and now I feel like that might have been a mistake.

4. A lot of "progressive" comedy/talk/sketch/fake news shows are so exhausting to me. Like every time one of the people liberals have anointed as unproblematic and funny/talented says something, we have to see it dozens of time on social media in this grandiose circle jerk. Like, do I really need to watch twenty different news sites cover the same 50-second clip of Louis CK talking about how women get talked to creepily on dating sites? Don't get me wrong, I agree with it and recognize the potential benefit in having people see it who might otherwise not have thought of the phenomenon, but it's often just so smug. And politically, there's only so much "dumb republican" content everyone needs to consume on a daily basis. We get it. People voting for Donald Trump say stupid things.

5. No matter how well I plan out my weekend, there is always at least 40 percent of my planned activities or tasks that simply don't get completed, and each Sunday night feels equally surprising and unexpected. I know that this is probably universal, and yet no one seems to have come up with a solid remedy to this. I've started to think that it's better and healthier to just not plan much for weekends, but then that almost guarantees a 48-hour period of lazing around the house punctuated by boozy socialization. I'm just not the person who will spontaneously hit the farmer's market, I have to set my mind to that beforehand. But by the same token, if I hit that market, it's almost guaranteed that the only other thing I'll do that day is make a cocktail and cook some of the food I bought, and then probably watch a movie. I guess that makes a "day of it," but I essentially have to choose between "completing some important tasks" and "doing something that requires any kind of travel." Also, after two day drinks, I'm totally shot. How do people get shit done after brunch? I know people who go to yoga after that shit. Insane. TC mark

5 Simple Things You Can Do To Stop Dating The Wrong People

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 02:52 PM PST

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Shutterstock

1. Don’t Compromise Beyond Belief

Nearly every relationship involves some kind of compromise. But there’s a difference between making compromises that make your relationship better and compromises that make you feel like you’re no longer yourself anymore. We’ve all been there before: dating someone we feel like we should hide things from. If you start seeing someone and you feel like you’re going to totally lose yourself because of how deeply you have to alter your identity, it’s not worth it.

2. Give Yourself Time To Heal From Your Last Relationship

The relationship person in us all gets crushed to smithereens when we break up with someone, which is why we are so quick to Tinder our way through the pain of being single again. We’re eager to find a replacement, stat. But when you haven’t healed from your last break-up you’re vulnerable, quick to jump at the first person who shows even the slightest interest in you so you can feel loved again. Give yourself time between serious relationships to heal. That way you’ll be better prepared to go after what you want. And you’ll be less likely to compare your new beau to your ex, too.

3. Enjoy Being Single

Use this time to find yourself so you can be emotionally ready when you do meet the person of your dreams.

4. Know The Kind Of Person You Want To Be With

This isn’t the same as having “a type.” All it means is knowing what didn’t work for you in the past and going after what you need in your next relationship. Relationships are definitely work, but it doesn’t have to be hard work. If it’s too hard, is it worth it? If it’s too hard, is it because you’re with the wrong person?

5. Just Stop Looking

Probably the most important thing you can do to stop dating the wrong people is to stop looking. Just stop. We are always swiping right and messaging people and crafting our profiles, but chemistry isn’t inside an app. Not to get all New Age on your asses but the person you’re looking for, the right person, will just show up on your doorstep when you least expect it. TC mark

Here’s What Your Favorite Celebrities Dressed Up As For Halloween

Posted: 01 Nov 2015 08:44 AM PST

Channing Tatum was Winnie the Pooh

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Kim Kardashian was Kim Kardashian

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Jessica Alba and friend went as Romy and Michelle

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Kylie was a warrior princess

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Heidi Klum was Jessica Rabbit (yes, that’s really her)

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Taylor Swift was Olaf from ‘Frozen’

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Gigi Hadid was Sandra Dee

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Andy Cohen was a John Mayer fan

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Nikki Minaj was a princess

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(I’m actually not sure if Justin Bieber is in a costume or not but here he is)

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Kourtney Kardashian and her kids went as superheroes

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Gwen Stefani was a murdered cowgirl

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Julianne Hough went as Alabama

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Ariana Grande went as Hamlet?

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Nina Dobrev went as Posh Spice

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Neil Patrick Harris and family went as Star Wars

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Miley Cyrus went as a tooth

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Tyra Banks went as Richard Branson

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