Thought Catalog


8 Reasons Why Love Is Something You Grow Into (Not Something You Feel Immediately)

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 08:00 PM PST

iStockPhoto.com / wundervisuals
iStockPhoto.com / wundervisuals

1. You cannot actually love someone you don't know. You can feel attracted to someone that you don't know, but you do not actually love them in a real, intimate, exclusive way until you at least have an idea of who they are.

2. Love is something you create, not an emotion that arises out of thin air. Many people fall in love, but few know how to develop it into something that lasts for this very reason. Attraction arises out of thin air. Love does not.

3. Love is a connection, not an attachment. The emotion you feel immediately when you see someone is what attachment is born of. It is the idea that they can solve all of your problems and give you the life you've always dreamed. On the flip side, a genuine connection based on mutual respect and appreciation is what love is born of.

4. The real reasons to love someone are the ones you discover over time. It's that they're always there for you, that they make you happy, that they are your everyday partner and most trustworthy confidante; not that they are attractive or have a great job or seem like "the one." (Those things are great, but are not the thing on which anniversaries are built.)

5. The more you love someone, the more attractive they become. When you're really in love with someone, you not only begin to think they are more attractive than they are, but you also begin to believe they're more attractive than you are, too. It's just a function of evolutionary psychology, but either way, proves that even attraction can be something you develop over time.

6. When you assume that love is just a feeling that just happens, you are always at the whim of it, rather than consciously creating it in your life. If you don't believe that love is something you can choose to create, you will be thrown around by your fleeting, shifting emotions for the rest of your life. One day, someone will seem perfect for you, and the next, you'll think you want to leave them, only because you don't feel the high you think is "love" anymore.

7. You cannot open your heart to someone in one fell swoop. It's not a matter of whether or not your heart is open or closed, just how often you choose to open it, and to whom. Even if you wear your heart on your sleeve, it takes time to create a connection with someone.

8. Love is emotional compatibility, not sexual compatibility. It's not what the rom coms would have you believe, but in the relationships that last, you're best friends more often than you're lovers. The "swept away" feeling may come and go, but when the foundation is solid enough, it doesn't really matter either way. TC mark

11 Men Confess What They Think About During Sex

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 07:45 PM PST

Paolo Raeli
Paolo Raeli
Found on AskReddit

1. I always think about the second season of Dexter

"I don’t know why but I always think about the second season of Dexter. A lot of pretty intense shit went down."

2. I do NOT need to fart!

"NO! I do NOT need to fart!"

3. Dear condom, please do not fall off like last time

"Dear condom, please do not fall off like last time. Please do not fall off like last time."

4. Math lasts forever. Me? Not so much

"A little weird but…x plus or minus the square root of b squared minus four a c, all over two a. Math lasts forever. Me? Not so much."

5. DontloseitDontloseit

"I think about…What her facial expressions mean…Go slower. That means faster! Oh no I’m too deep…she wants to change positions. Alright we changed. Fuck I did leg day yesterday my legs are so sore! This position burns like hell….ENDURE! Endure the leg burn! Oh wow I had to come but that intense leg pain got rid of it. I wonder if she’s enjoying this as much as she could be…What could I do better…oh yeah she loves this one thing! Fuck yeah it worked she’s going crazy. Oh Kay I want to come…time to get her off. Hmm. She tasted better when I did this before we fucked. Does that mean I taste bad? No. I think it’s just a combination and more of her juices are coming out. Alright come on come on. Fuck NO DON’T COME YET SHE NEEDS TO FIRST. Think about something else…Fuck Fuck ( I’m a bartender so I usually think about drink recipes) Fuck yeah she came! Woo woo now my turn. Fuck she keeps quivering I can’t quite get it….Alright I’m going to do doggy and then go as deep as I can. I love that position, makes me come very hard every time. Don’t lose it Don’t lose it Don’t lose it DontloseitDontloseitDontloseitDontloseit. YES YES YES HERE WE GO! Should I try to come in her mouth…she said she would not mind…..FUCK I LOST IT….repeat the above step and finish…It’s along those lines but usually different. This was me last night."

6. Trump and sanders in ‘pirates of penzance’

"Bernie Sanders and Donald J. Trump performing an unabridged performance of The Pirates of Penzance."

7. If I’m trying to last a little longer I usually think about my wife

"If I’m trying to last a little longer I usually think about my wife."

8. Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!

"Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!
Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!
Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day!"

9. I'm pretty sure she told me she was on the pill

"I'm pretty sure she told me she was on the Pill."

10. I wonder how difficult ships have it when they dock and if it is more difficult when it storms

"I often get lost in my head and think about all kinds of things. Mostly metaphors for sex. I wonder how difficult ships have it when they dock and if it is more difficult when it storms. How do they do it? I’ve always wanted to be on a boat, a big one, during a storm. Speaking of storms, don’t you just love the wetness of rain? When it’s not cold, but warm rain during the summer, feels really nice. I wish it was summer and raining outside. Oh yes, where am I? Cumming."

11. I spend my time reading the covers of X-Men and The Avengers while dick-deep in pussy

"My girlfriend has a whole wall of Marvel and DC comics and another wall to posters of famous Classic Rock groups. So I spend my time reading the covers of X-Men and The Avengers while dick-deep in pussy." TC mark

11 Women Confess What They Think About During Sex

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 07:14 PM PST

Jeff Bergen
Jeff Bergen
Found on AskReddit

1. Am I even attractive?

"Am I even attractive? Are my boobs even bouncing when I’m on top? No? Great. Oh good, he’s turning me around. At least he’ll have something good to look at now."

2. Can he feel how fat I am?

"Can he feel how fat I am? Why does he even want to have sex with me? I’m gross. But damn, he’s good at this."

3. the smell of sweat and shame

"If it’s going to smell like sweat and shame afterwards."

4. HOLY SHIT THAT DICK

"During the foreplay I’m usually thinking: 'Wow, I’m so lucky to have him. He’s so handsome and out of all the women he could have, he chooses me. Holy shit his hands are going to all the right places. Clothes off. Level 2. Yasssssss. HOLY SHIT THAT DICK. During the actual sex I’m too busy having my brains fucked out to really think."

5. Do we have pizza rolls in the freezer?

"Up until I climax I usually think things like, 'Does it usually feel this good?' or, 'Goddamn I like genitals,' but after I finish and he keeps going I usually wonder something along the lines of 'Do we have pizza rolls in the freezer?' Or 'I wonder how much longer he’s going to take.'"

6. Am I making an ugly face?

"Unfortunately, 90% of the time I’m thinking about my insecurities. 'Am I tight enough?,' 'Am I making an ugly face?,' 'That moan just sounded like a grunt,' 'My thighs look horrifying.'"

7. How much it would suck if the condom broke

"How much it would suck if the condom broke."

8. Usually I have a very nasty earworm that is stuck in my head

"Usually I have a very nasty earworm that is stuck in my head. It isn’t always the same one but I have a song in my head."

9. How many weeks ago did I put in my Nuva ring?

"This is boring. Where do I look? I don’t want him to see my eyes right now. Should I close my eyes? Will it hurt his feelings if I close my eyes? Am I scratching him? Will he be upset if I scratch him? Will he be bummed if I don’t? How many weeks ago did I put in my Nuva ring? But at the same time the part of me that doesn’t think in words just keeps telling me how much I love him. I hate that I feel this way. It feels unhealthy to be so bored with sex."

10. How perfect it is

"How amazing his hands and mouth feel on my body, how warm his skin is. How beautiful his face is as he concentrates on his rhythm, sparking the most intense sensations inside me. How full I feel when we do this, both physically and emotionally. How perfect it is and how lucky we are to get to do this with each other for the rest of our lives."

11. I had to mentally remind myself he was not in love with me

"When I was with one particular guy, years ago, I had to mentally remind myself he was not in love with me. It was so good, I actually almost fell in love. With my husband, it’s mostly the occasional worrying if the kids will wake up." TC mark

Why The World Needs Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 07:00 PM PST

NickBulanovv
NickBulanovv

The world needs ENFPs to inspire people who have lost their purpose and can't find their way.

The world needs INFPs to mend broken spirits and inspire great compassion.

The world needs ENFJs to guide and mentor those who cannot find a way to go on.

The world needs INFJs to understand the human condition at its core.

The world needs ISTJs to ensure that we are carrying out tasks optimally.

The world needs ESTJs to ensure that everyone is staying focused on what really matters.

The world needs ISTPs to make sense of the way things work and how they can be manipulated to our advantage.

The world needs ESTPs to explore new opportunities that others are afraid to pursue.

The world needs ENTJs to implement complex, long-term plans for the future.

The world needs ENTPs to synthesize and invent new ideas.

The world needs INTPs to bridge the gap between what is and what could be.

The world needs INTJs to cultivate visions of an optimal future.

The world needs ESFJs to shelter and care for the people who live in it.

The world needs ISFJs to promote loyalty and commitment to what matters.

The world needs ISFPs to showcase its beauty and mystery.

The world needs ESFPs to bring people together and relish in the world we all share. TC mark

17 Types Of Sex Every Healthy Couple Has

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 06:15 PM PST

jmerobbinhood
jmerobbinhood

1. Special occasion sex.

Cuz it's his birthday or Christmas or his dog just died and you're like "we should prolly…"

2. Sleep sex.

When you kinda wake up to a dispassionate butt-grab and decide to roll with it.

3. Sloppy sex.

When you're drunk and have lost complete control of your fine motor skills but still know how to ride a d.

4. Obligatory sex.

The "meh" kind you have simply because you just showered and you guess you could be into it.

5. Kinky sex.

Because life is too short to pretend like u don't get spanked.

6. Sensitive sex.

Because sometimes you're tryna ~make love~.

7. Speed sex.

When one of you has to be somewhere in 20 minutes but you're also horny af so you make it happen in 10 minutes or less.

8. Bad sex.

When somebody's just not wet enough, and nothing feels all that great. It happens.

9. Funny sex.

When somebody farts or starts scatting or does something equally weird and you can’t stop laughing so you have to take a break.

10. Angry sex.

"I FUCKING HATE YOU BUT YELLING AT YOU IS TURNING ME ON SO LET'S GO."

11. Make-up sex.

When you wanted to slice each other open (in a decidedly nonsexual way) five minutes ago but now you're feeling each other again.

12. "I owe you" sex.

Because there are times when you're down to sell your body. Simple as that.

13. Experimental sex.

Your friend told you about some weird sex thing she read about. It sounds freaky af but you wanna try it. So you do.

14. Sick sex.

You do it because you think it'll make you feel better, but snot ends up in places it should never, ever exist. That doesn't stop you from trying again during the next flu season, tho.

15. Post-gym sex.

When you're sweaty and full of energy and throw your slippery bodies on top of each other just becuz you can.

16. No penetration sex.

Because there are times you just don't feel like getting poked.

17. All-for-her/all-for-him sex.

Because focusing on your partner's pleasure is hot! TC mark

I Should Have Left You Behind In 2015

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 06:00 PM PST

jinnkisss
jinnkisss

I should have left you behind in 2015.

We weren't right for each other in the beginning of the year, so why did I think anything would change? Why did I stupidly believe you just a month ago when you said we were headed in the direction of getting back together?

Instead, I refused to let go, and I brought our problems, and you, into 2016.

I could tell you were done with me the last week of 2015, but I didn't want to take the hint. I'm human. I deserve better. I shouldn't have to figure it out from your lack of conversation or avoidance to hang out. You should have enough respect for me to tell me.

I didn't want to pressure you into telling me you were done. Yet I did. Because I'm sick of letting others know where I stand and then sitting around for them to make up their damn minds. It had been a few days since we had last spoken. I messaged you to see if you wanted to talk and you said you were busy, so we decided on today. You said it would be short. Who says that? That's essentially the same thing as telling me you're done, but then painfully stopping by my house for five minutes to mumble a few words, shake my hand like it’s a business transaction, and leave. I hope you feel good about yourself.

I feel sick. I feel nauseous thinking about what happened. But most of all, I feel sad.  I want to cry. I want to scream. I can feel the tears in my eyes but they won't come out because I don't cry. I never can. But right now I just want more than anything to cry it out. I want to cry you out. I want to get you out of my system. I want to forget about you. I want to move on from you. I want to be over you. I want to be able to feel validated without your approval. I don't want to worry about what your friends think of me because they're not my friends. They're your friends. And they don't even know what's best for you.

So congratulations, you disposed of me once again. Forget about where you touched me last weekend. Apparently that meant nothing. Forget about pouring out your emotional baggage to me. Forget about kissing me over and over. Forget me.

I could be there for you. But you won't let me. The majority of the time I leave you feeling like shit. I don't even know why I want to be there for you. I just do. That's the question of the hour, isn't it? And one I'll never know the answer to. And one that will never be validated because you're finally out of my life, but not out of my mind.

I should have left you behind in 2015, but at least I didn't waste too much of my time on you in this new year. You're clearly not worth it. If only I could get that through my head. TC mark

Why Being 25 And Single Is The Absolute, Goddamn Worst

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 05:52 PM PST

sofia cordova vega
sofia cordova vega

Being 25 fucking sucks. Sometimes it's great, but mostly it sucks. If like me, you were a precocious eleven year, you dreamt your twenties would be just like Sex and the City; sitting around coffee shops with your three best girlfriends discussing 'up the butt' and your Mr Big.

Fast forward 14 years trying to get your three best girlfriends in the one cafe is much like being a cat wrangler; futile. Plus, if anyone is doing 'up the butt', you can bet your bottom $1 lube they're not telling you.

It's not like I think I'm Carrie Bradshaw or anything, but as I sit here pondering the banality of my life, I couldn't help but wonder, does this shit get better?

If life were like a Sex and the City episode, Carrie's monologue would draw to a close, prolific question would hang loosely in the air. Jump forward one scene and Miranda tries to get more comfortable with literal shit, Charlotte's husband is a figurative piece of shit, and Samantha's in a shitty same-sex relationship. By the magical (not real) nature of life (nature of scripted TV), all the answers would unfold via the three central characters' trials and tribulations. But life is not Sex and the City and being 25 fucking sucks.

And like any other mildly expressive Gen-Y I am going to list the reasons why.

beetlejuice

At work you're someone's bitch and you can't foresee that changing in the near future.

You went to university, got a degree and even got a job in your field. But to quote Kanye on the joys of life after tertiary education, "If u kiss enough ass, you'll move up to the next level, Which is being a secretary's secretary!"

It's not like a half decent job doesn't exist, it just doesn't at the company you're at. So you leave that understaffed, outdated- business model and land yourself a new gig. Seems great right?

But it's not. In some ways, it's worse. Expectations are high. So high, you wonder if meeting them is even within reach. The workload creeps up on you, the way kilos do on your arms. The personalities you deal with are called Arrogant, Controlling and Critical. Didn't you read a stat somewhere that said 1 in every 25 bosses is a psychopath? Yeah, that sounds right.

The worst part though, is that you start to question yourself and your abilities. Your friends start to get promotions and claim mid-weight bitch titles. But even they feel overwhelmed and under satisfied. Being someone's bitch at 25 fucking sucks.

Your love life consists of drunken party hook-ups, and Tinder and Facebook messages from dudes you knew before 2013.

Okay so the drunken party pashes are fun. Okay, okay! They're not just necessary crushes or flings either. But it's never with the right person.

Even if they are the right person it's not going anywhere. Not after being so inebriated together you forget they're a person- not a penis. A person with family, aspirations, a history and a penis. What is it about sleeping together that makes you both unable to picture sitting across from one-another, sober, at dinner?

Tinder isn't any better. I don't care what anyone says, meeting a perfect stranger face to face is equally if not more scary than jumping out of a plane. Honestly, Oscars for all the honeys out there meeting up with fellas like it ain't no thang. It's a thang. You and your ego are shitting themselves like a prozzi after her first bump. There you both sit, pretending like you're perfectly comfortable on a civilised date, find (read: feign) three things in common while you polish a bottle of wine so you can feel human.

Then it's time to bone. It's bad. Bad, bad, bad. Or maybe it's not awful, but it's awkward. Please tell me I'm not the only one to have fallen in love, only to find out having sex with them is comparable to a dugong trying to do the salsa?

Then there are the dudes that use private message the same way men in the 80's used their little black book: hitting up the ladies they didn't have the courage to approach three years prior, when you two getting together would have actually made sense. Mainly because back then, you lived in the same state. Now 3 states away Barry wants to know, 'how u been?' and 'what're u doing?'. Perfect. That's what I need: no sex and no company from 2013 Baz on the other side of the country. I'll take the Dugong/Bad sex thanks.

Bills, Bills, Bills.

Listen, I'm lucky. I don't have that many bills. t's just: rent, my phone bill, plus the electricity and gas when they come in quarterly. My university degree re-payments come out of my wage (thank you Hawke Labour Government circa 1989) and I don't have a credit card. It's not that I have many bills, it's that I don't have any assets. I don't own a car, my unit is rented and I have $100 minus $30 to my name until next week when I get paid. I'm basically one accident or staff cut (fuck up at work) away from retirement…to my mum's spare room. It's just a hop, skip and a drunk tumble away from financial bankruptcy. Did someone say, anxiety?

Staying reasonably slim is near impossible.

In the words of Selena Gomez, 'I just want to look good for you' but that shit is hard boy. You want me to eat boiled eggs and spinach for breakfast, no milk in my coffee and then pass on literally the only thing at work worth getting excited about: Diane's farewell white chocolate mud cake? Refer to Bieber's smash: 'Sorry'.

It's not that you don't work out either. You hit the gym three or four times a week but it's no where near enough to counter the after dinner highway robbery of your willpower and the 7 biscuit ransom being held against you.

You're too old now to avoid adulthood.

If you're 25 and still living at home, you're either from a migrant family, a mummy's boy, or a loser. Maybe you're all three!

Okay, okay, that's totally harsh. But don't blame me! Take that finger and point it firmly toward western culture. Not even Shoshanna Girls lived at home still, and she was the pansy of the group!

Having your own place was going to be just like Friends: You and your best girlfriend were going to live in a huge loft apartment with a lounge room the size of Kim K's ass and your two male neighbours would come over every day, one with their head in a turkey. Instead you're in a rundown terrace, illegally subletting off the original lease holder, sitting in your room furnished to your 'individual' taste care of little known Swedish brand IKEA, watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills eating a block of chocolate. That block being only 'family' thing about the place.

beetlejuice

If I had to summarize it in a sentence, being 25 sucks because I'm not where I want to be. I'm single, 10 kgs overweight, an available balance of $100 (I spent $30 while I wrote this) and dreading Monday. But, on some level I'm okay with it. I left the house this morning, I'm writing at the local cafe with my housemate and there's still one and half days till Monday. For now, that's all I need.

If you has asked me my ideal way to spend a Saturday 6 months ago, I would have said this. Sometimes you might not be where you want to be, but if you take a moment, remove the shades and put down the latte you might notice that in this moment. In this very moment, you're okay and things don't suck so much. TC mark

19 Fascinating Hebrew Words That Don’t Have Any Direct Translation In English

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 05:44 PM PST

Julia Ivantsova
Julia Ivantsova

The Hebrew language has many magnificent words that simply don't hold the same greatness when translated to English. Here are 19 of them.

1. CHAVAL AL HAZMAN (חבל אל הזמן)

This phrase translates to "shame on the time." It is used when referring to an amazing experience. It is like saying you could only wish for more time.

2. ANI META ALECHA (אני מתה עליך)

"I'm dead about you," similar to saying "I'm crazy about you".

3. TITCHADESH (תתחדשי)

This word translates to "be new." It is used when someone purchases new clothing or has a new item. It is like saying "Enjoy your new thing."

4. FIRGUN (פירגון)

It is to have a generous, unselfish spirit and a joy in the accomplishment of someone else. It is having an empathic joy for something good that has happened. It means to make someone feel good without having an alternative motive.

5. CHUTZPAH (חצפה)

A characteristic trait to describe someone with audacity, be it for good or bad. Now more commonly used to describe someone when they have crossed the line of acceptable behavior.

6. KOEV LI HALEV (כואב לי הלב)

The translation is "my heart hurts" and it is used as a form of showing empathy for something or someone. It is used to say you identify with the suffering of someone else so much that it causes your own heart to ache.

7. STAM (סתם)

The word can be used in several ways. It can be used like "just because," "no reason," or "just kidding." It is for when something isn't important.

8. DAVKA (דווקא)

It's like saying despite expectations or when something is ironic or contrary to belief. The opposite of what is expected.

9. NESHAMA (נשמה)

A word used similarly to "sweetie" but it literally meaning “soul.” People say "neshama sheli" which means “my soul.” It is used often to both men and women. It is like saying you are so important to me that you are part of my soul.

10. L'ECOLE SRATIM (לאכול סרטים)

It means "to eat movies." It's like saying someone loves drama. Used for someone overdramatic or someone who likes making a scene out of something small.

11. CHAI B'SERET (חי בסרט)

Similar to the last one….”Living in a movie.” When someone is being over the top and unrealistic about a situation.

11. LACHFOR (לחפור)

Means "to dig" but it is used to describe someone who talks too much and loves to gossip.

12. NAIM MEOD (נעים מאוד)

This is used upon meeting someone for the first time. It is in replace of "nice to meet you" but it literally means "feels very comfortable."

13. GO'AL NEFESH (גועל נפש)

The first word means “revulsion” or “disgust” and the second word means “soul.” A disgust that reaches the soul.

14. LA'ASOT CHAIM (לעשות חיים)

This is something you say to someone that is about to embark on a journey or travel or do basically anything exciting. It means “to do or make life.” That is it. Plain and simple, just do life.

15. AL HA'PANIM (על הפנים)

Translates to "on the face." Used to describe when something was really awful. “The food tonight was on my face,” meaning very bad.

16. SOF HA'OLAM SMOLA (סוף העולם שמאלה)

Slang used to describe a place that is in the middle of nowhere. Translation, “at the end of the world, turn left.”

17. SOF HADERECH (סוף הדרך)

Literally means "end of the road" but used to describe something awesome. Like, "that party was end of the road."

18. KAPARA ALECHA (כפרה עליך)

The exact translation is “Atonement over you” but used as “darling” or “sweetie.” The word Kapara is actually the word used for an old ritual orthodox Jews did on Yom Kippur (the day of atonement).

19. YALLA (יאללה)

Although this is an Arabic word, it has become a common word in Hebrew slang. It means "let's go" and it can be used in so many ways. It can be used for "let's go," "hurry up," etc. The best thing is when you're nearing the end of a phone call and the moment someone says "yalla," both parties know it's time to go and there is not awkward, "Well, I guess I'll let you go…." This word is like the equivalent of verbal punctuation! TC mark

25 Lessons About Beauty We Should Teach Girls When They’re Little

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 05:15 PM PST

Jane Tan
Jane Tan

1. The world’s definition of beauty doesn’t have to define you.

2. But you can choose how you wish to define beauty in the world.

3. Your existence and worth as a human being is not attached to whether the world finds you beautiful.

4. But there is beauty in knowing your inherent worth as a person.

5. You don’t owe anyone “being beautiful.”

6. But you do owe it to yourself to find the beauty in you, so you can find the beauty in others.

7. It’s a good thing to take care of yourself on the outside, and you should.

8. But you shouldn’t ever let that care consume the person you are, or the person you might become.

9. There’s always going to be a reason at any age, to be insecure about how you look.

10. But rather than let your insecurities lead, if you choose confidence, you’ll find that it’s always a good look.

11. There is always going to be another beautiful girl in the room.

12. But rather than see the other beautiful girl in the room as someone to compete with, see her as someone who is the beautifully complex human you are: someone who loves, fears, and who also has imperfections.

13. Learn to love your imperfections because many of them are the things that make you different from everyone else.

14. But know that having imperfections are also what make you similar to everyone else.

15. Choose to be around people who see you, the real you, and all of you.

16. But do not be afraid of the people who can’t see you, and don’t let their lack of (in)sight determine the spaces you choose to enter.

17. There’s nothing wrong with getting dolled up a little or a lot, and feeling beautiful because of it.

18. But know too that there’s a girl who’ll always live in you, who wants to be comfortable with herself before the bells and whistles.

19. Learning to still love yourself in those moments when you feel anything but beautiful, is one of the most difficult things you can attempt.

20. But attempting this sort of self-love teaches you that your perceptions of your beauty should transcend circumstance.

21. Your scars, both the ones that can be seen and the ones that can’t, are to be cherished.

22. But however significant those scars are, don’t define yourself entirely by them.

23. Know that beauty doesn’t have to be loud and ostentatious. It can be soft and quiet, and it often is.

24. But know too that you don’t have to hide your beauty. Don’t make yourself less than or try to be smaller for the sake of beauty.

25. And always, always remember that however you wear your beauty, the best forms of it will always be kindness, compassion, honesty, and love. Those things, more than anything else, are what will make your beauty timeless. TC mark

My Clairvoyant Friend And I Are Digging Deep Into The Mystery Of ‘Making A Murderer’ (Part Four)

Posted: 28 Jan 2016 05:00 PM PST

Netflix
Netflix

Read Part One Here.

Read Part Two Here.

Read Part Three Here.

Amy went through an email full of photos to read. I switched things up a little and included some new photos, particularly ones of highly suspicious characters. Highly suspicious characters such as:

Scott Tadych

Netflix
Netflix

People in the comments have been begging Amy to take a look at Brendan and Bobby Dassey’s stepfather. He acted very strange on the stand — why is his face twitching so much? — and as I mentioned before, his over-the-top reaction to Steven Avery’s conviction is alarming to say the least. ("What happened yesterday is the best thing in the world. He got what he got comin' to him.") So what did Amy have to say about Mr. Tadych?

The mustache man in the next picture…he is lying as well. It is incredible how much deceit I pick up in everyone of these pictures. To me, this man…mustache man…would be easy to tell he is lying. Like, others could hear what he is saying and out of all of them…could tell he is full of BS.

“Mustache Man”, I love it. Anyway, the “tell” she brings up could very well be the twitching I referenced earlier. His face jumps all over the place while being questioned. I remember upon first viewing that I didn’t trust him — and neither, it seems, did most of you.

He is not doing a very convincing job of backing up in confidence what he is saying here. Whatever that may be. I also feel he is a witness to seeing people or cars or things that place people and objects at certain places at certain times. He also feels like he was at the crime scene…so a cop as well or something to do with that.

As a refresher, Tadych says on the stand that he was hunting during the time the crime would’ve been committed. He mentions the “big fire” on Steven Avery’s property. He then says he saw Steven Avery near the fire. He also says he passed Bobby Dassey on the way to hunting — weird that he’s setting up an alibi for his stepson for no reason, eh? Everything in his statement is exactly what Amy sees: he’s trying to place Steven Avery at a suspicious fire, Bobby Dassey on the road, and himself hunting during the time of the crime.

No one other than his mother and his stepson saw him that day. So the only alibis either Bobby Dassey or Scott Tadych have are each other? You’re right, Amy, I’m not buying it. I’ll call BS.

And if he was at the crime scene — since we are all aware Tadych is not a cop, what would he have been doing there? The pieces are starting to fall into place.

My first official theory: two of the five men Amy sees being involved with Teresa Halbach’s murder are Scott Tadych and Bobby Dassey.

Referring back to a read Amy performed of Bobby Dassey:

I feel there is a lot of lying…of course! Lying to each other’s faces. A lot of fake family loyalty that is really just all this grossness of hate and judgement brewing under the surface. Fake loyalties and fake allegiances too. A lot of game playing. It is exhausting to tune into. I don’t know how these people lived life this way. More backstabbing and fake faces forward and lies and competition and cover-up than I have ever seen.

Between the Jandas, the Dasseys, and the Averys, this all seems to fall in line with what we’ve seen. Why is Tadych so against Steven Avery? Barb Janda’s loyalties ping-pong back and forth the entire series. Why did Bobby Dassey make up the line about Steven Avery joking about getting rid of the body?

Second official theory: someone in the Janda/Dassey/Avery clan hated Steven Avery and wanted to put him in prison for good.

The question here, of course, is why?

Let’s look at some of the key evidence from the case:

Teresa Halbach’s Key And Steven Avery’s Blood

Netflix
Netflix

We all know that these two pieces of evidence are considered the most damning in the case. The key was found in Steven Avery’s bedroom after DAYS of searching and not finding anything, wiped clean of all DNA except Steven Avery. The vial of blood was taken from Avery during his incarceration for the 1985 rape case (I believe) and was found to be tampered with. The evidence file had been cut open and resealed with scotch tape; the top of the vial had a puncture mark.

It’s been speculated that the vial was used to plant Steven Avery’s blood/DNA in Teresa Halbach’s car and the key was planted in his bedroom. Another key point — ha ha, get it? — is that in most photos, Teresa has a bundle of keys, not a single key on a single ring. Where did her other keys go?

I have sent these items again to get a deeper read on them but here’s Amy’s initial read for reference:

I see posing. Things being posed. Objects. The first thing that flashed with the picture of the vial of blood and the key was a person placing it carefully, but quickly in different places. I actually feel the man in the first picture I read…Baldy…has something to do with placing things?

“Baldy” refers to James Lenk, who Amy previously read as being very involved with the case and essentially in a corner, doing what he is told, protecting himself. I want to know more about these things, how and why they were placed how they were. And what about the FBI tests that said the blood DIDN’T come from the vial?


We’re drilling down to details now. I’ve sent more photos of Scott Tadych, a shot of the Janda/Dassey clan in court, Len Kachinsky, and a shot of the Avery garage. And yep, you bet — Mike Halbach at last. (I promise I haven’t been keeping him from you, just that I wanted a wider variety of photos to send along to Amy to get a very in-depth read.) Time to look into the nitty-gritty to start potentially figuring things out. I finally feel like we’re getting somewhere. TC mark

Part 5 Coming Soon.