Thought Catalog

10 Signs You’re On The Verge Of Finding Real Love

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 08:00 PM PDT

  1. You've finally realized that romantic love is not the end-all-be-all of your existence. It is no longer your top priority, most unrelenting obsession, or deepest interest. You are not solely invested in finding someone else to give you the attention and respect and admiration you now know how to give yourself.
  1. You're starting to focus on the love you can give, not the love you can get. You want to love someone as much as you want to be loved; you're going into your relationships with the mindset of "what can I offer?" as opposed to "What can I get?"
  1. You've taken enough time to work on yourself. You don't have to be perfect to be loved, but for a relationship to work, if not thrive, you need to have any real crippling emotional issues at least addressed beforehand.
  1. You're hurt, not devastated, over your last breakup. If you didn't mourn the loss of someone in your life you wouldn't be sane, but when it gets to the point of utter devastation, it's usually a signal that you were unhealthily attached, not actually in love.
  1. You want a relationship, but not desperately so. Yes, you want to date, and yes, you do want to maybe find someone you can commit to, but you aren't broken or reeling if this isn't the case. You still have a life to run outside of your romantic interests.
  1. You've let go of the idea that you can predict, or measure, whether or not someone is "right" for you. You've tossed the "checklist" out the window, and are starting to focus more on who you connect with as opposed to who appears to be the most "right."
  1. You don't feel the need to rush. You aren't attached to the timeline anymore; you realize that the need to rush into things is usually a product of insecurity and fear rather than passion and love.
  1. You believe there is love out there for you. If you don't think it's there, it won't be. You simply won't open your mind or heart to the friend of a friend you get set up with, or the person sitting next to you at the bar. It all begins with how you *think* about your love life, and the most important thing is that you believe you're going to have one.
  1. You're choosing to be yourself more than you're trying to be someone else's ideal. You're at the point where convincing someone that they love you for someone you're not is scarier than being rejected for who you really are.
  2. 10. You'd all but given up. You were just at the point where you thought you'd never find love again, and that you'd have to be alone forever – and you more or less accepted this, to a degree. It's always when we're most inclined to throw our hands up that the thing we've been waiting for walks through the door. TC mark

22 People On The Most Bizarre Places They’ve Had Sex That’ve Seriously Turned Them On

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 07:15 PM PDT / AZarubaika / AZarubaika

Sometimes the bedroom just isn't satisfying your desires anymore and you need to step outside the comfort of your own room to spice things up a little bit. The only trick is not getting caught, arrested, or banned for life during your daring moments. Avoiding getting caught can be half the fun, along with the story that comes out of it. And remember, if it's a rockin' don't come a knockin'.


1. "I broke into a house being built by my current landlord, we had sex on the unfinished floors and I went to the roof and hung up my underwear like a trophy because my landlord is a dick." — Mary, 22


2. "There is a one-lane bridge in my hometown and during the day my boyfriend and I went on top of the bridge and had sex while cars were passing underneath us." – Sarah, 20


3. "I had sex on a boat with this guy while the boat was tied up (sadly not me) and there were people around. It was absolutely risky and people definitely knew what was going on, but we didn't care." – Carly, 21


4. "I had sex on a four-wheeler by the side of the road, it was after dark and only one car passed us. I just casually waved when they honked." –Sam, 23


5. "I was having sex with this girl in my truck in a field in the middle of what I thought was no where, but these guys on four-wheelers came in the trail and definitely knew what were doing in the back of my truck, but I figured why stop and kept going. Might as well give ’em a show." — Mike, 25


6. "On a stage that was on the beach, at night, that Waka Flocka and Diplo performed earlier that day. Figured a little more sweat on the stage couldn’t hurt." – Ned, 23


7. "I was walking home from the bar with this guy and I really wanted him. We started making out and he started fingering me while I was standing up outside of houses on the sidewalk. Looking back it was super raunchy, but I thoroughly enjoyed it at the time." – Kim, 26


8. "I started having sex in the filthy bar bathroom. Needless to say it was the men’s room so it couldn’t be dirtier. Everyone knew what we were doing somehow, maybe it was her loud moans and the slapping sound. I ended up getting banned from the bar. It was worth it; she was a hot cougar. I don’t think it was her first time getting down and dirty in the bar bathroom." – Cameron, 24


9. "I was hooking up with this girl on this private beach, at least I thought it was private. We'd been there multiple times and no one had ever been there, but this time an elderly couple was going for a walk on the beach. It was embarrassing, but oddly thrilling and gave us all a good laugh." – Dan, 27


10. "I had sex in my car outside a party. Everyone knew what we were doing, people came outside and started jumping on my car and looking in the windows, but we just kept going. The windows started fogging up and they were drunk anyways." – Stevie, 20


11. "I fucked this girl in the bathroom stall at a concert. It was actually disgusting because so many drunk dudes were throwing up and taking shits. The floor was already nasty so I figured I could just pull out and finish on the ground. We tried to be discrete, but like I said there were drunk dudes, so they were banging on the stall door and cheering." – Kevin, 24


12. "One time I went to the drive in and things started getting hot and heavy so we decided to go into the back seat. Well we started having sex, but didn't realize until after that the windows were all foggy and the car was shaking. Guess there were two shows going on that night." – Michaela, 22


13. "This girl and I were setting up a huge breakfast at work and once we finished setting up we walked to the other room to put tables away and she started grabbing my dick. We had a real intense quickie in a closet. She grabbed a high chair and so I could rail her from behind. It was so hot and kinky that she initiated everything." – Derek, 25


14. "I was in the laundry room in a dorm building during preseason cross country camp and we were having sex on a washer during the middle of the night. We were so close to getting busted by our coach. It was intense." – Nick, 19


15. "I used to bring my ex to where I worked after hours and we would fuck on the conference table. She gave me a blowjob while I was sitting in my boss’s chair at his desk once too. I hope the janitor did a good job cleaning because it was always a mess after. Sorry to all my old co-workers, hope you keep your heads up during conferences (pun intended)." – Ryan, 28


16. "I had sex in the end zone of my college's football field. I got a lot of turf in my ass, but I'd do it again." – Ciara, 21


17. "It was the 13th fare way of a golf course in a gated community. Next time I could go for two hole in ones if you know what I mean." – Jennifer, 23


18. "A hammock. Everyone should try it." – Drake, 23


19. "The top floor balcony of an apartment building, while it was down pouring rain. Anyone could have definitely looked out their window and saw us, maybe they even did. It added some extra lubrication." – Jordan, 28


20. "Started in my living room, continued to my kitchen, and ended when my roommates walked in on us when I had her up on the table doing her from behind." – Tyler, 24


21. "Living room floor of her parents place. Not as good as their bed, but still." – Kyle, 23


22. "On a trail at a state park during the day. It was risky, but we didn't get caught…so it was fucking worth it." – Sophia, 21 TC mark

Happiness Leaves (But It Always Comes Back)

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 07:00 PM PDT

Wendy Liu
Wendy Liu

Happiness is going to find you many times throughout your life. It will greet you like an old friend, and you will talk for hours about all of the beautiful memories you have shared before it has to run to catch its train or make it home in time for dinner. See, happiness is going to find you many times throughout your life, but happiness will also leave.

Happiness will leave to help you grow, to help you feel things it only ever would have masked within you. You will learn how to befriend your sadness, you will learn to let it hold you. You will learn that you could not rely on happiness in certain areas of life, that it simply did not fit into the experiences that grew their lessons from grieving and heartache. Sadness will lace its fingers between yours, it will hold your hand and tell you that it understands your pain, that it understands your need to simply come to terms with your anguish and your remorse. Sadness will invite all of your demons out to lunch, it will make you talk to them, it will make you sit across from them and look into their eyes. Sadness will make you face yourself.

Then, after days, or months, or years, after lessons have tangled themselves around your questions, after understanding has melted into your skin, you will hear a familiar knock within your chest. You will feel a familiar sense of Spring thawing within your ribcage, laughter will no longer crack within your throat. Slowly, but surely, happiness will tiptoe back into your life. It will sneak through a window you didn't realize was open, it will tuck itself with the wind to greet you on a rainy day. It will hide within the ink of your favourite book, dance within the melody of your favourite song. Happiness will thrive within the spaces between seconds, between the horizon and the sky. You will find it at the bottom of coffee cups, in the salt of the sea. You will appreciate its presence, you will feel its warmth.

Yes, happiness leaves; but when it comes back you are always stronger, for you have understood what it means to make it out of the wreckage, you have learned how to survive in the dark. TC mark

Pasted image at 2016_02_26 03_41 PM

Read more writing like this in Bianca Sparacino’s book Seeds Planted In Concrete here.

5 Dark, Twisted, And Hilarious Horror Movies On Netflix

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 06:30 PM PDT

Empire International Pictures
Empire International Pictures

With House of Cards and Daredevil both premiering on Netflix this month you might have enough to stream already. But just in case you don’t, and, just in case you’d rather see some good old fashioned blood and guts, we combed through the streaming selections on Netflix to see what’s worth seeing.

Horror-wise, Netflix does alright. It usually has a solid selection from old school classics (The Exorcist) to modern favorites (The Babadook). But there’s a special subgenre of horror that deserves more attention. Horror comedies are often overlooked for being too scary or too goofy. But when you catch one that gets it right, well, the results can be fantastic.

You don’t have to be a horror fan to appreciate the following films, but it does help. A lot of the comedy in them comes from a self-aware sense of humor about the genre itself. But they have goofy laughs too which all types of movie fans should be able to appreciate.

(These movies are taken from the American Netflix menu. Apologies if any aren’t available in your area.)

Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

Tucker and Dale VS Evil
Tucker and Dale VS Evil

Starring: Tyler Labine, Alan Tudyk, Katrina Bowden, Jesse Moss

A glory of misunderstandings and misconceptions, Tucker and Dale vs. Evil is a mess of well-known horror tropes turned on their heads in the name of comedy. Set in the woods, the title characters are rednecks, the types you’d see in Deliverance, but Tucker and Dale are really just normal guys vacationing at their dream cabin. They just happen to be in a horror movie. So when a gang of college students run into them on their own getaway, they assume the boys are degenerate killers. It’s a smart, wickedly funny film that defies expectations throughout. [2010, 89 minutes]



Starring: Stephen Spinella, Roxane Mesquida, Jack Plotnick, Haley Ramm, Wings Hauser, Ethan Cohn

The brainchild of auteur Quentin Dupieux, Rubber is the story of a killer tire. Yes, for those unfamiliar, a tire is the villain of this very self-aware piece of horror comedy and it’s a formidable presence. Through telekinesis, the tire, named Robert, can make your head explode (among other things) if you cross him. To explain this ridiculous conceit, Dupieux frames his story by introducing a group of people at the beginning who gather to watch a film in the desert. A sheriff tells them many things happen in cinema “for no reason.” And Rubber is one of them. A meta-commentary on film, horror, and the people who love them, it might be too smart. [2010, 82 minutes]

Bad Milo!

Bad Milo
Bad Milo

Starring: Ken Marino, Peter Stormare, Gillian Jacobs, Stephen Root, Mary Kay Place, Patrick Warburton

If you don’t know about Bad Milo!, you’re in for a treat. This was one of the funniest subversive films of 2013. Its disgusting premise will make you vomit and smile at the same time. Duncan (Marino), under intense pressure from his boss, mother, and sweet wife (Jacobs), visits a doctor to investigate his recent stomach pains. They discover he has a gross little demon living inside him who springs forth from Duncan’s behind to kill the people who make him too stressed out. In an effort to curb the violence, Duncan befriends the cuddly little turd which leads to some very funny scenes. [2013, 84 minutes]

Summer of Blood

Summer of Blood
Summer of Blood

Starring: Onur Tukel, Anna Margaret Hollyman, Dakota Goldhor, Jason Selvig, Dustin Guy Defa

Here’s what would happen if Wes Anderson made a horror movie. Summer of Blood is the Onur Tukel show. The Turkish actor plays a misanthropic hipster named Erik whose social ineptitude costs him his girlfriend and leads to a depressed conversation with a vampire who promptly converts him to the dark side. Now a bloodsucker, Erik struggles through post-breakup life, turning dates into new vampires and discovering he has a talent for hypnosis. The quiet indie comic sensibilities applied to the horror genre in this film are a blast even if the story is somewhat lacking. [2014, 86 minutes]



Starring: Jeffrey Combs, Bruce Abbott, Barbara Crampton, David Gale, Robert Sampson

The Godfather of the horror comedy genre, Re-Animator lives in film history for its absurdity, incredibly bad special effects (in a good way), and cult status. The movie critic Pauline Kael once called “pop Buñuel” is a must-see for horror fans of every generation. The story follows a medical student obsessed with bringing the dead back to life. His experiments prove successful but each test subject becomes a violent zombie, a nasty side effect. Be warned, this film is gory as hell, but the extremity only adds to the hilarity. Combs is a marvel as Herbert West in one of the horror genre’s most insane camp performances. [1985, 86 minutes] TC mark

This post originated on Zimbio

13 Women Confess The Craziest Mid-Breakup Move They’ve Ever Pulled

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 06:00 PM PDT


1. “I may or may not have ripped the speakers I bought him for Valentine's Day out of his wall. I regretted it for a second, but like… now I have a dope new pair of speakers.”

— Juliana, 21

2. “I keyed his brand new BMW. I was in high school and we were both fucking nuts. He paid for it. He was like, 'you right, you right…'”

— Kira, 23

3. “After I found out he cheated on me with his ex, I stripped his bed and threw the sheets I bought him in the middle of street. I'd bet anything his sorry ass slept on a bare mattress for a week.”

— Winona, 25

4. “Told him I was gonna fuck his brother. Hahahaha.”

— Michelle, 22

5. “I sent his mom a lengthy email detailing what a consummate douchebag she'd raised. Included some intriguing details about his coke habit. Oops!”

— Vanessa, 23

6. “Complicated story. Rest assured, I told him he'd find his belongings scattered all over Midtown.”

— Qiana, 27

7. “He cheated on me with two different girls from my sorority, so I slept with his roommate in his bed, filmed part of it from the neck down, and sent him the video.”

— Elise, 24

8. “Oh, LET ME TELL YOU. After supporting him (and his kids) financially for years, my 40-year-old leech of a boyfriend announced that he'd met a younger woman on some idiotic app called Yerdle and that he was moving to Long Island to be with her, conveniently right after I'd switched to a lower-paying job. I punched him in the face. No regrets. Dude is still unemployed, and his Yerdle boo now supports him.”

— Kirsten, 32

9. “He told me I'd live a boring life and that his would be filled with passion and art and meaning. I told him I hoped he'd find all those things and fucking choke on them.”

— Genie, 26

10. “I burned all the t-shirts, sweatshirts, etc. he'd given me during our relationship. Posted vids of the bonfire on my snap story. Very dramatic. Don't think he expected anything less.”

— Belle, 21

11. “I included a bill for the blood test I had just done to confirm that I was not, in fact, pregnant in the box with all of his stuff when I went to go drop it off at his place. I knew he wouldn’t pay it, but I just wanted to be brat.”

— Carrie, 25

12. “Despite his several follow-up phone calls and texts, I simply didn't respond to a breakup email. Because, I mean, it was a BREAKUP EMAIL.”

— Jo, 27

13. “I was breaking up with my first *real* boyfriend over the phone and in the middle of all the crying he excused himself for a minute. He came back and said 'I just threw up. That's how sad I am.' I really wanted to be sympathetic—I felt terrible, he sounded like Anne Hathaway when she was hyperventilating through 'I Had A Dream' in Les Mis, but all I could say was, 'Ew, that's so gross.' Then I hung up.”

— Gemma, 24 TC mark

Sext: I Have This Dream Where You Are Biting My Bottom Lip Until It Bleeds

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 05:30 PM PDT

sext: I have this dream where you are biting my bottom lip until it bleeds.

sext: I have this dream where you lean down to kiss me and it feels natural.

sext: I have this dream where you are on a cloud reaching out to me and I coyly run and hide, then suck on your finger till thunder sounds.

sext: I have this dream where we are happy and fulfilled by each other.

sext: I have this dream where you want to kiss me in public.

sext: I have this dream where you ask me about my day and do not follow it with an invitation to come over when your parents are asleep.

sext: I have this dream where we tell the truth until it nauseates us.

sext: I have this dream where you throw pebbles at my window every night to lull me to sleep.

sext: I have this dream where I do not try to sell you an idea of myself.

sext: I have this dream where you finger the commodity of me then whisper, I want the real thing.

sext: I have this dream where I nibble your neck and someone else's name does not spill out.

sext: I have this dream where I ask you what you want and light floods from your mouth into me. TC mark

Why A Touch Of Madness Can Sometimes Be The Key To A Happy Life

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 05:00 PM PDT

Damian Borja
Damian Borja

"Love that is not madness is not love." ~ Pedro Calderón de la Barca

A touch of madness can help us experience love to the fullest and understand exactly what 'crazy in love' means. It helps us love unconditionally, fearlessly and foolishly. No one ever forgets their first 'mad' love or first time they really gave their all. You can only experience the euphoria of love when you allow yourself to be madly drenched in it.

"It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane." ~ Philip K. Dick

The society we live can drive us crazy in so many ways. If everything that surrounds us can turn crazy and chaotic, then we have to adjust to it. a touch of madness will help us get through the unexpected events that happen to us, it can help us deal with the people who give us a hard time and it can help us navigate our way through the absurd rules that we blindly follow.

"I have found both freedom and safety in my madness; the freedom of loneliness and the safety from being understood, for those who understand us enslave something in us." ~ Kahlil Gibran

A touch of madness makes us a mystery to those around us – no one knows what we will say or do next, no one knows where we will go or if we will ever come back. There's freedom in madness, freedom in people not expecting you to conform, and freedom in changing without having to explain to everyone. A predictable life is a boring one.

"No great mind has ever existed without a touch of madness."  ~ Aristotle

A touch of madness can unleash the great potential we have as artists or as human beings. By creating things and putting all our madness in one project, we can create a masterpiece. By putting our madness to good use, we can help others and help ourselves. Help someone get out of trouble, change someone's life, break certain rules, run away from things that we don't love. The most powerful minds are those who dared to be different, those who rebelled, those who took a different path, and those who were labeled 'insane' and 'mad' at some point. Madness should be another word for genius. Sometimes madness can change the world.

"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." ― Friedrich Nietzsche

Ironically, madness can sometimes be wisdom. Madness prompts us to step outside our comfort zone. When you stop taking life too seriously, when you dream big, when you take a big risk, when you tell someone you love them, when you move alone to a new country, when you a quit a job you hate, when you dance like no one is watching, and when you unapologetically become who you really are, you will find that madness is actually liberating and sometimes the only way to keep your sanity in this world.

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.” ~ Steve Jobs. TC mark

Why The Most Beautiful People Love The Feeling Of Falling In Love

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 04:30 PM PDT


I'm infatuated easily, too easily. I love the rush that happens almost instantly. I crave the instant physical and emotional attraction with crazy emotion involved. I love that it's quick; an obsession that you know will soon die out. It will only occupy your mind a certain amount. It keeps things interesting; it brings out different parts of you. It teaches you about yourself a little more, it helps you realize what makes you feel alive.

Infatuation is shallow, while love is deep. It's not serious; it's more fun like flirting with temptation, it becomes sort of a new guilty pleasure for a period of time. It's having your mind completely consumed with something or someone new. It's just the idea of being in love with an idea of something or someone, rather than actually being in love.

I became infatuated with you; it was never more than that. I had a burning craving for you inside me, but it soon died out like the last flicker of a candle in a dark room. You were all I thought about, you consumed me. You made everything else irrelevant; I wanted to be with you always. I wanted to talk to you and touch you and feel you. My infatuation with you grew with desire; it was delusional. It was loud and undefined; your name came out of my mouth like word vomit I couldn't control. Then just like a typical infatuation, it was gone. My infatuation left unannounced and I became infatuated with something new.

I became infatuated with places. Places I've never been, but only seen pictures of. I became obsessed with the idea of going there. I imagined the food, the people, the mountains and the beaches. I imagined the view and the air.

Maybe it would, maybe it wouldn't, I might never know.

I became an infatuation with my favorite restaurant. Always craving it, always ordering the same thing. I always needed it I told myself, even when I didn't. Even when I wasn't hungry, I just wanted it because it sounded good. It was an urge I couldn't satisfy any other way. That's the thing about infatuation, no matter what it's with no one or nothing else can satisfy the desire you have in you for whatever you're yearning for.

The cycle begins again, with a new person, a new place, or a new restaurant.

But infatuation is selfish; all we're doing is only trying to please ourselves for a certain period of time. We don't care much about what is on the other end or who might get hurt, because we want ultimately want to feel satisfied. We just drop it; no longer wanting whatever it is. You leave it to be washed away and picked up by someone new, whoever is looking for the next piece of them, where you couldn't find yourself.

I'm in love with infatuation because the pleasure it fills me with. Always growing, always learning, always feeling completely satisfied with life one way or another. I love being infatuated with different parts of my life, always, because in this life there are a million and one things to fall in love with every day. Why not take advantage of that? TC mark

15 Signs That It’s Actually Impossible For You To Arrive Anywhere On Time

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 04:00 PM PDT

1. Part of your ‘getting ready’ routine involves coming up with the apology text explaining why you’re going to be fifteen minutes late.

2. And you usually start crafting it in your head before you’re even sure that you are going to be late (but lol, you’re pretty sure though).

3. You also have to set aside at least two hours for fixing your hair and choosing an outfit, mostly because you’ll spend an hour and forty-six minutes of that time laying on your bed either watching Netflix or doing nothing.

4. The number of instances in which you sent the “On my way!!” text while you were still putting on pants is inappropriate.

5. You’re even late when it comes to getting into your Uber on time. Somehow, in-between you ordering the Uber and actually getting inside the car, three other things come up that demand your immediate attention. Usually what happens is you just get overconfident about being able to brush your teeth, grab your bag, and hunt down your keys in the two minutes it takes for the Uber to get to your front door.

6. When being late is absolutely not an option, such as a job interview, a wedding, or a plane you have to catch, you give yourself at least a one or two hour cushion period on top of the amount of time a normal person needs. And you still end up running down to the very. last. minute.

7. The number of times you hit the ‘Snooze’ button every morning is actually offensive. It’s pretty much the main reason that you arrive to work every single day sweating and out of breath.

8. And when other people joke that they hit ‘Snooze’ three or four times before they get up, you’re just like “Aw, that’s cute.”

9. When plans are being made in the group text, you will always be called out when everyone is discussing what time to meet up.

10. Usually they just pick a time and then add on a twenty minute grace period for when they assume you will arrive.

11. You make plans in your head to arrive super early instead, thinking That’ll show them. But then you fall into a black hole of pointless things like bingewatching YouTube videos, reading Wikipedia articles about things you don’t care about, and scrolling through Instagrams of the kind of people who use ‘Fit Tea.’ And the next thing you know, you’re crafting your ‘why I’m gonna be late’ text.

12. When you are under absolutely zero time constraints, there is never any traffic and you hit every single green light. But when you’re running sixteen minutes late, everything that could possibly delay your commute even further will absolutely happen. Such is life.

13. Then when you tell your friends about all these insane reasons why you were late(r than usual), they just smile disinterestedly because you giving your ‘this is why I’m late speech’ is simply standard practice.

14. You’re unsure of what it feels like to walk anywhere in a leisurely manner. Because you’re always the person walking around that leisurely person because you’re already running so far behind.

15. People often say that lateness is a sign of arrogance, as if your time is more important than that of others. And you definitely understand why they would say that and why they would feel that way. But in actuality, your lateness is usually just a sign of you being an overly-optimistic idiot. TC mark

25 Dates Every Girl Needs To Take Herself On At Least Once A Year

Posted: 27 Mar 2016 03:30 PM PDT

I firmly believe that you can't have a fulfilling romantic relationship until you're okay spending time with yourself. Learning how to be alone with yourself, your thoughts, your emotions and your crazy brain isn't always easy, but it's worth it. It will make you a more secure, chill partner to someone in the future. You're stuck with you for the rest of your life, so reward yourself for stickin' around with fun solo dates. Like Marilyn Monroe said in The Prince and the Showgirl:

The Prince And The Showgirl
The Prince And The Showgirl

1. Have a beer and spend some time browsing Pop Culture Died in 2009, the greatest Tumblr of all time.

2. Leave your phone in the car and go for a walk without any distractions.

3. If you really, truly can't leave your phone for more than an hour, make a really dorky playlist of all of your favorite songs from junior high on Spotify and then listen to it while you walk.

4. Netflix and chill – without a grabby-hands partner trying to distract you.

5. Buy yourself a new dress, wear it out of the store and take yourself to dinner. Or at least for a fancy cocktail.

6. Do something you'd only do on your own, like eating (X) while watching "House Hunters" for hours.

7. Stop by the MAC store (or your favorite cosmetics counter at Nordstrom) and get your makeup done, just for fun. You don't have to go anywhere, just get prettied up and take a few selfies.

8. Marathon your favorite TV show – but do it without your phone by your side. Pay attention!

9. Watch an old movie. I recommend anything with Marilyn Monroe or Carole Lombard, or "It Happened One Night."

10. Is your favorite guilty pleasure band coming to town? Take yourself on a date, dress up and have fun.

11. Spend an hour or two wandering through one of those huge, legendary used book stores. Read a few pages of poetry.

12. Get a box of wine, perch it on the corner of your tub, fill said tub up with bubbles and enjoy. I like to prop my laptop up and watch PBS documentaries on Netflix while I soak.

13. After you're done soaking, do a face mask, paint your nails and fulfill all your childhood fantasies about being an adult woman. You know, the green face mask, towel turban and cucumber slice montage kind.

14. Buy yourself flowers. Make an event of it and visit the fanciest florist you can find near you, then splurge on the extra-large bouquet.

15. Go to the movies alone. No friends, no partner, no nothin' – just you.

16. Spend the afternoon with your vibrator. It's always there for you, and you don't even need to make it a fancy meal.

17. Take as many selfies as you want. Change outfits. Change up your hairstyle. Have a glamorous photoshoot like you did as a teen in your Myspace days.

18. Are you feeling extra fancy (and flush?) Spend the night in a slightly-nicer-than-Holiday-Inn hotel. Order a mimosa or a glass of wine from room service, then watch "SVU" until you fall asleep. Get a room with a Jacuzzi if you're in need of extra pampering.

19. Do you have an Aveda Institute in your area? Book a facial and massage and relax for less than a fancy spa.

20. Sit at the bar alone and talk to the person next to you. Bonus points if it's an old person! Don't stare at your phone and scroll through Twitter. Make a connection with someone.

21. Take a weekend trip to visit a friend or family member who lives an hour or two away. Listen to all your favorite music on the drive and sing along – no one's there to hear you warbling.

22. Cook something crazy for yourself. Pick a recipe from Martha Stewart, Chrissy Teigen or the Pioneer Woman and make it, then enjoy it by yourself at the table like a proper young lady.

23. Bring the book you can't put down to the park. The last time I visited New York, I legit spent almost two hours on a park bench reading "Fates and Furies." It was awesome.

24. Go see a psychic.

25. Indulge your inner Monica Geller and clean your house. No one will ever know that you spent an hour organizing all your clothes by type, texture and color. Isn't that the beauty of a little alone time? TC mark