Thought Catalog

30 Ridiculously Foolish Tweets That Will Make You Laugh Your Ass Off

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 03:00 PM PDT

1. Yes, so similar…

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2. Those things didn’t exist in the 90s…

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3. WTF

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4. Our country is 100% doomed

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5. Girl, you do what you want in bed — but keep it to yourself.

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6. Plz let this one be fake.

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7. What calendar are you using??

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8. What a keeper.

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10. Nobody knows. Maybe it’s on his sekrit birth certificate

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11. I can’t even.

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12. The answer to everything is yes.

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13. *logs off the internet forever*

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14. me 2

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16. brain power must be what’s LOADING. . . .

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17. that hashtag though

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18. u r so close to the answer

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19. okay have fun

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20. LMAO


21. does this girl ever learn??


22. GEE, I wonder how

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23. plz tell me more about the country Antartica

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25. You should be taken for quartz?

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26. orly?

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27. this must by why people are afraid of HGTV

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28. No Words.

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29. H-E-L-P.

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30. Idk, who knows?

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Loving Someone Is A Bit Like Holding A Small Bird

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 02:41 PM PDT

Razvan Narcis Ticu
Razvan Narcis Ticu

Once, a bird flew in through an open door of my house and darted frantically around the living room and kitchen. Eventually, it calmed and hid behind a decorative pot on a high shelf. I quietly climbed up up on a step-stool, reached behind the pot and somehow managed to enclose the bird in my hand without it getting away. I could feel its small form fluttering and struggling inside my hand, and I was careful to keep my fingers loosely closed around it so that I didn't squeeze too tightly while I carried it outside to release it.

Loving someone is a bit like holding a small bird. Care is required in the handling of the bond between hearts. Love's paradox is that it's both an incredibly powerful thing, and delicate in nature. Betrayal or neglect are not the only ways that love dies. It can also be smothered or crushed. By clutching out of fear or possessiveness, we may kill it. Negative experiences in past relationships may make us fearful of losing this wonderful love we have discovered, and so our instinct is to grasp tightly. Ironically, this choke hold on a heart can stifle the other person and lead to the very loss of love which we are afraid of.

Embrace your lover's heart in openness and trust. Hold love softly, and grow confident in the connection you share with them. Give it room to breathe, flutter its wings, and soar freely from your open hands. We cannot force love, but we can nurture it. With that nurture, our love will grow stronger and fly to new heights. Fear constricts our hearts, but trust expands them. Choose to trust love. TC mark

People Who Are Truly Happy Don’t Need To Label Themselves (Or Others)

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 01:00 PM PDT

Carrie O'Brien
Carrie O’Brien

I want to be a psychoanalyst. I want to be a journalist. I want to be a researcher. I want to work with refugees. I want to be a traveller.
We only ever allow ourselves to choose one thing, don't we? And, as I have been so far unable to do this, I have been labelled and boxed into the unequivocally, "lost," "unsure," and "finding herself" categories.
These stamps, understandably, have caused me great anxiety on a deeply personal level.

On a daily basis, I find myself asking: Is there something wrong with me? Why can't I pick one thing and stick at it? Am I afraid of commitment? Am I not really very good at anything? And without this one true calling, this goal, what really is my purpose?

The problem with these questions is that they suggest that we all have one destiny, our one true calling; do one great thing and focus on achieving this, no matter what we would prefer to be doing.

However, Emilie Wapnick has questioned this line of thinking: "Ask yourself where you learnt to assign the meaning of wrong or abnormal to doing many things – I'll tell you, you learnt it from the culture."

If like me you have many different interests, desires, ambitions, Emilie has not called you lost or unsure, she refers to you as a "Multi- potentialite."
In my family, there is a real tendency towards pigeon-holing, labelling each other and placing each other in boxes. Take for example, my brother Jack, "Jack's the real money-earner, Jack's the successful one, Jack's the marketing expert."

Yes, he is all of these things. But this ignores all the other things I know about my Brother – like that he has a real passion for drum n' base, that he's funny, the life and soul of the party and yet although he might not like to admit it, is kind and thoughtful to the point of sending me gifts from Australia during some really tough days. That he once had a teddy mouse called Super mouse, and that when he was 8 years old, his hamster named Ryan Giggs had the biggest funeral a furry animal has ever seen in our back garden. And that he really likes Ethiopian food.

You see, Emilie's "multi-potentialite" reference shouldn't just apply to the career we align ourselves with but also with our whole self, our whole being. Jack is not wholly one thing. He's dynamic, multi-layered with completely apparent opposite interests and passions. He has so many sides to him, and I can see that he is constantly gaining new sides as he travels along through life.

The problem with working towards just one true calling is that it suggests humans are static, unchanging, steady beings. But I know this to be untrue. Just look at the fluidity of each of us – the way our minds shift, the different paths we choose to take, our altering dreams and ambitions.

The most troubling aspect of assigning a human with one true calling is that you deny all that they can be. Unlike Emilie, I don't believe there are just a select few of us that are multi-potentialites, I believe that each and everyone of us are multi-potentialite's and we are capable of so much more than the boxes we are placed in.

We need to stop labelling each other, it's neither healthy nor accurate.

Instead, let's start inspiring each other to be all that we can be by asking not what our one true calling in life is, but what kind of things we want to do and be within our one life? TC mark

Read This If You Refuse To Let Your Anxiety Overpower You

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 11:00 AM PDT

Brooke Cagle
Brooke Cagle

I was born three months premature and weighed only about a pound upon delivery. Everything about me was so weak, but everything about me was also so strong. I was tiny and fragile and looked like something out of a horror movie. But, my parents told me I fought like hell. I guess I had some strength within me.

The first time I had a panic attack was in high school. I was eating dinner with my parents, when all of a sudden I couldn’t breathe. I ran to my room, trying to take deep breaths and to clear my head of any negative thoughts.

But, the tightness in my throat wouldn’t go away. As I inhaled the best as I could, my breath became shallow and I felt no oxygen pass through my lungs. My throat felt like it was being clenched by someone else, like someone was wrapping their hands around it and squeezing it with all their might. In that moment, I truly thought I was going to die. And my life changed.

I don’t know what made it stop. I just remember my whole entire body shaking uncontrollably, and being paralyzed with fear of the unknown. I remember my sister getting my parents, trying to do something to calm me down. I remember my mom turning on a Taylor Swift CD, and my dad telling me it was going to be ok. I remember my teeth chattering together, and my fingers twitching back and forth every second. And then after what seemed like a very long time, the shaking stopped. I could take a deep breath again. I could feel ok again.

But these attacks don’t happen just once in someone's life. At least they didn’t in mine. I was diagnosed with a rare condition called “Vocal Cord Dysfunction” as well as Generalized Anxiety Disorder. When these attacks occur, my vocal cords close while I’m trying to inhale. It feels like my body is choking on itself and there is nothing that feels quite as terrifying as that does.

I thought it would be something I would grow out of. I thought it would be something I could move on from or ignore it until it was gone for good. But anxiety is a strange and terrible beast. It sneaks up on me at work. It tells me “hello” while I’m boarding a train. It seduces me while I’m riding an airplane. It attempts to shock me, and to chase me. And sometimes it wins. But I am a survivor. I will fight like hell just like I have done before. And I will survive and live through this.

I have come to understand that anxiety is something I will always have to deal with. And it is something I will always have to learn to accept. I’m not at the point yet where I can control it. Some days, it still controls me. If you are struggling right now with anxiety as I am now, I hope you never feel defined by your anxiety, even if you feel like it has a strong hold on you. You are bigger than it. You are stronger than it.

Anxiety tells us that we aren’t tough enough and that we don’t have what it takes to knock it down. Society will tell us that that it is weak to ask for help.

But we are the furthest thing from weak. It may take months or many years, but one day we will be able to sit on a train without fear. We will be able to walk to work without shaking. We will be able to ride an airplane without crying. We will be able to live our lives fully and face those demons head on together. TC mark

Read This If Everyone Says You’re Worth Loving, But You Still Can’t Seem To Find Love

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 09:00 AM PDT

Drew Wilson
Drew Wilson

I can't write down a list of the names (or I should say "the ghosts") that have told me something and made my face turn red.

I'm being explicit with their word use. That's how that magic works. It's rarely physical. Words can connect us in ways that skin cannot.

Some people invest months telling me every day that I'm handsome. They say I'm sweet and funny. Sometimes, when I'm sleepy or drunk and I talk without having any consideration on consequences, I can be kind of sexy.

Then again I'm going to emphasize that is only the result of combining certain words that somehow make sense.

I've been told that I'm kissable, that I'm huggable. I've received some invitations to "sleep under a star blanket," just because "it'll be cute to live that scenario with me.”

Others have pointed out how lucky will be the person I'll marry someday. But nobody actually wants to do it.

Nobody thinks I'm good enough. Everybody is pissed at how long I hold a person I have feelings for during a hug. The pitch of my voice is insufferable whenever I say I'm glad, happy or satisfied with the company of certain person. I'm just too intense for expressing my thoughts and feelings.

And I'm so used to people who vanish, that I've learnt to excuse them.

I have this hypothesis where I think I'm a non-solved mystery in the universe. As a result of that uncommon category, people will comment on it and spread the word, after all, they all sound and look interesting.

But truth is, a quick research washes out every attempt on understanding such an unnecessary answer you could live your life without.

And that's exactly what I am. TC mark

Social Media: Wrecking Relationships Since The Days of MySpace

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 08:01 AM PDT

IMG_1402Ahhh, social media. It's the crutch of our generation; the bane of our youthful existence. We love it, we hate it, we love to hate it. But most of all, we're addicted. Whether it's Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, SnapChat, or MySpace (please, oh God, don't let it be MySpace), we simply can't get enough.

But, consider this: could social media be negatively impacting the quality of our romantic relationships? I know, I know, I'm a PR Girl – I'm supposed to absolutely **aDoRe** social media, and I do! I really do. But I'm also realistic, I'm observant, and I'm raising my hand because I've been personally victimized by social media, and I'm 99% sure that I'm not the only one.

Think about it. Is your boyfriend "best friends" with another female on SnapChat? Or did he just tweet at a blonde with suspiciously slutty eyeliner? Or wait, HELL TO THE NO… did he just 'like' that bitch's Instagram selfie!

We've all been there. No, we're not very psycho, or needy, or insecure. The problem is the constant prevalence of accessible, real-world competition that makes us feel like shit. Odds are your boyfriend's social media habits do not differ exponentially from your own. We're all young, we're all in college, and we all talk to members of the opposite sex. Get over it! However, social media puts that innate tendency in the technological spotlight, totally on display for investigative girlfriends.

Let's explore a few of the worst offenders, shall we?

Twitter: How is it possible that 140 characters can inflict so much heartache? So your "BAE" just tweeted at slutty eyeliner blonde. Crazy GF mode: initiate! You follow her handle until you're on all 40K tweets of her grammatically incorrect feed. You might pretend like it doesn't bother you, acting all nonchalant at first. However, your cool cover will be blown on Friday night when you're incoherently drunk and your sweet boyfriend tries to buy you a drink: "No, you stupid asshole," you'll scream in a mixture of tears and pure obliteration. "Go buy a drink for your Twitter whore!" Embarrassingly, I speak from experience.

Facebook: Don't even get me started. Facebook relationship statuses were created for one reason, and one reason only: to destroy the happiness of the involved individuals. In the event of a break up, or even a 2 week "break," the first thing a girlfriend checks is her relationship status: it's the eternally awful mind game of who will be "single" first. As if breaking up wasn't bad enough, now Facebook blasts the entire juicy situation over the Internet. Not to mention you're stuck with an extremely public time capsule of couple pictures and old wall posts, along with 20+ texts from "concerned" friends asking, "OMG I saw FB what happened!!!!!!!!" No, thanks.

Instagram: Oh good, an entire social media dedicated to #MCMs and #WCWs. I swear to the holy Lord, if I see one more girl #MCM her boyfriend, detailing how effing amazing and wonderful and smart and talented and athletic and handsome and perfect he is, I will personally report her for being inappropriately ANNOYING. There is nothing worse. Awww, your boyfriend got you two dozen red roses and a $350 Coach purse for V-Day? STFU, you spoiled braggart; love and affection aren't supposed to be bought. Instagram provides the perfect platform for girls – and guys – to constantly compare their romantic satisfaction with their photo-savvy and forever smug counterparts.

While Twitter, Facebook and Instagram are the worst, they're definitely not unique in their relationship-ruining abilities. SnapChat, Pinterest (wedding boards, oh my!),, and even MySpace can completely alter the way you interact with your S.O. The next time you're feeling especially pissed off, take a step away from your iPhone and really think about why you're mad. If the anger originates from a post on any social media platform, reconsider. You are stronger than the Internet, and hopefully so is your relationship. TC mark

You Are More Brave Than You Know (So Stop Second-Guessing Yourself)

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 07:00 AM PDT


When we think of bravery we often ponder the heroes and heroines in popular movies and television shows. We think of dangerous battles, jumping from high places, looking evil right in the eyes and defeating it. And that might be one type of bravery, but it’s not the only type — and perhaps not even the bravest type.

Bravery is pushing yourself past the point where you want to give up. It is staying up late talking to a friend. It is standing up to make yourself heard. It is confronting authority, even when it’s safer to keep quiet.

Bravery is enduring. Bravery is waking up knowing that nothing will be handed to you, that things will be messy, that shit will go down — but forging on anyways. Bravery is knowing something might not work out, knowing that pain is possible, but still trying. Still fighting. Still going.

Bravery is believing that tomorrow can be better, even when it seems like you are surrounded by darkness on all sides. Bravery is feeling depression, anxiety, loss, pain and experiencing them without succumbing to them. You don’t have to be fearless to be brave — you just have to take one shaky step forward.

Bravery is knowing that life isn’t perfect, and that it might never be, but loving it anyway. Bravery is loving everyone — even their flaws. It is  loving yourself — even your flaws. And people can let you down, and you can let yourself down, but bravery is trying to love in spite of that. Loving even when you feel the hot breath of hate against your neck.

Bravery is trust. It is trust in an age where we don’t trust each other, where everybody seems two-faced, where love seems like something we hear about from our grandparents or watch on Netflix. Bravery is the soft kiss that says, “Everything will be alright,” and the tight embrace that says, “We are here for each other.”

Bravery is giving a dollar when you only have one to spare, and not knowing whether your money will be well-used. It’s trusting yourself into the hands of someone else, knowing that they might screw you over, but choosing to believe the best in people anyway. It’s giving someone the opportunity to fail, putting yourself on the line in the process.

Strength and power aren’t always bravery. Sometimes the bravest things are done with a stutter and tremble. Sometimes the bravest thing is getting out of bed, even when you know the day is going to be hard. Sometimes the bravest thing is cutting off a toxic friend, or helping up a loved one, or paying the bills, or taking you child to work, or pushing yourself one tiny inch out of your comfort zone. Sometimes bravery is just going to bed, ready to try again the next day.

How to be brave? You’re doing it right now. TC mark

The U.S. Government Finally Admitted ISIS Is Committing Genocide. Why Aren’t We Doing Anything About It?

Posted: 09 Apr 2016 05:00 AM PDT

Flickr / Игорь М
Flickr / Игорь М

Three years ago, as I sat in a cozy coffee shop writing a Huffington Post entry on the Syrian Civil War that remains depressingly relevant today, people died in Syria. They died for no other crime than that of being more human than their executioners. They died, and the world did nothing. Our country did nothing. As masked men strode through Houla and Idlib and Homs and Latakia, as they raped wives and killed husbands, as they pressed cold guns against the soft hair of children whom parents had coddled only a small while before, the world watched.

The thought that it is in human nature to push a pistol against a child's head and to squeeze the trigger is terrifying. Yet this is happening even today, now, as I sit here typing this new entry in a new coffee shop—privileged—and as you sit reading my words. Indeed, Secretary of State John Kerry recently admitted that this greatest form of theft—murder—has become so targeted as to constitute genocide.

This genocide is being dealt by ISIS, an unprecedented cancer that's metastasized since that last article. That the Syrian conflict has radicalized in this way is the result of a shameful yet understandable five-year silence. It's a silence that immobilizes us humans when we see something we know to be wrong, and when we sense hatred that is too strong to comprehend. It's the silence of the countries that bore witness to the Rwandan genocide in 1994, the silence of my younger self on the playground when I watched others be bullied for fear that if I intervened I, too, would be shamed.

Now, as ISIS monsters stride through villages, crucifying Christians and burning Yazidis and erecting slave markets the likes of which we'd all thought banished to a too-dismal past, the world's silence has grown so loud as to be deafening. We are standing by as genocide strikes. We—we Russians, we Iranians, we Chinese, we Saudis, we Turks, we Europeans and, yes, we Americans—are putting our national interests above human life. We're allowing the ISIS monster to consume more land, more humans, more souls, to consume indeed the very soul of a religion itself. Enough already! Enough.

"But the international community isn't silent!" you say. "Kerry just called out ISIS for genocide!" Please. Does the world condemn ISIS? Yes. But talk is worthless without meaningful action. Secretary Kerry's determination—finally—that ISIS is committing genocide is welcome but toothless. We are loud with our voices, yet we are silent in the only way that matters. You can't stop genocide with words and drone strikes.

Still: The State Department acknowledged an ongoing genocide for the first time since 2004. This should be a first step towards more concrete action. No, there are no easy solutions; yes, the path will be hard, speckled with potential missteps. We must not repeat the blunder of unilateral action. But an effective international military coalition—which we should encourage more forcefully—is desperately needed. There's just too much at stake to "let things play out."

We know how letting things play out ended in 1994. TC mark