Thought Catalog

25 Real Two-Sentence Sex Stories That Will Make You Really Horny (Part II)

Posted: 04 May 2016 08:30 PM PDT

Photo by
Photo by

1. "She was a waitress at a fancy event I went to, a sultry sex goddess who leaned in casually and whispered, 'Fuck me from behind and come on my back.' Two hours later, I did just that.”

2. "I pushed him to the edge, circling my tongue around the tip of his cock and inching it up and down the shaft. Then I mounted him and bounced up and down until he climaxed like crazy."

3. "I get hard just thinking about my dick sandwiched between her beautiful tits. Every thrust between those mountains of breast flesh gave me an orgasmic rush and I squirted more than ever, ejaculating a snow blizzard of come all over her chest."

4. "We were grinding on the dance floor and I tingled with pleasure as I felt the massive serpent stiffening between his legs. When he unfastened his pants later that night, I gasped and thanked God for the gift of his cock."

5. "My date's reputation in the blowjob department was unmatched, and her five-star Jenna Jameson level performance did not disappoint. She licked and sucked and slurped and swallowed just right."

6. "It was the middle of dinner and  I was horny AF, so I grabbed my own tits, licked my lips, and signaled my boyfriend to come hither. He crawled under the table and I straddled his face and let him lick my clit right there until my needs were met."

7. "My husband and I stay in every Saturday night and film ourselves fucking for strangers on the web. We both get hot putting on a show for other sex thirsty couples."

8. "Five years ago, I fucked twins on vacation in Jamaica and that night’s been my go-to jerk off fantasy ever since. Two pairs of boobs jiggling around plus two cunts and two mouths on my dick equals heaven."

9. "He watched me finger myself until I was dripping wet and then he plunged it deep and hard again and again. I never stopped touching my clit and it was like I orgasmed inside and out that night."

10. "She made me feel like a total porn star, the way she moaned and groaned and worshipped my dick. I wish I'd hit record ’cause I'm getting rock hard remembering the way she squirmed around, getting all moist and ready for it.”

11. "My nipples were poking right through my top that day at work, he knew it and I knew it. The sexual tension became too much, so he pinged me to meet him in the empty closest on the 2nd floor and we fucked with our clothes on."

12. "We were sexting back and forth the day my mobile rang and she moaned, 'Talk dirty to me, baby. I'm touching myself.' It was the best phone sex I've ever had."

13. “He nibbled my flesh from neck to toes and nipples, turning me on until I screamed, 'Fuck me, you tease!' He complied, happily.”

14. "Her plump red lips practically screamed, 'Give me cock.' Who was I to deny her the pleasure of the D?"

15. "Swapping was never my thing, but we met the sexiest couple a few months back. Now we fuck each other's wives the first Friday of every month, then we sit around naked, eating pizza together, and it’s the best fucking part of my life."

16. "She was into BDSM—nothing crazy, but handcuffs and whips and stuff. I had no idea how awesome it would be to get tied up and spanked, but as soon as it was over I was begging to be punished again."

17. "I love pussy and penis equally, so when my husband asked for a threesome, I was totally game. Any time I can suckle on titties between mouthing balls, I'm a satisfied lady.”

18. "Last year, my wife gave me a ‘hall pass’ to fuck whoever I wanted for 48 hours straight and I maxed that shit out. In the span of two sex crazed days, I boned two blondes, a brunette, and a redhead until my dick so sore I thought it might fall off."

19. “'I'm hungry for your pussy,' he texted, minutes from my doorstep. He wasn't a romantic, but he was a badass in bed and the orgasms were mind-blowing, so who cares really?"

20. "Middle of her mid-year review, the 20-something who works for me spread her legs, taunting me with that classic no panties, Basic Instinct thing. Obviously I couldn't concentrate, so I drew the blinds and fucked her and then gave her the raise she wanted."

21. "He asked how I masturbate so I whipped out a vibrator and showed him firsthand, then I tickled his balls and we took turns playing with the thing. By the time we were fucking, I'd had two orgasms already."

22. "I dove face first between her legs the second I got home after being away for a month. Turns out a little pleasure delay is the key to unforgettable, animalistic banging."

23. "Her vagina smelled as good as it tasted. If I could drink a smoothie of her pussy juices every single morning, I would."

24. "He was 15 years older, but I didn't care. The bulge in his pants belonged inside me, so I went for it like the rabid naughty girl I am."

25. "'My pussy is the missing piece to the puzzle of your cock.' That's what she said the first night we met, and I’ve been her willing sex slave ever since." TC mark

64 Men And Women Share The Freakiest Sh*t They’re Into And Why (Absolutely NSFW)

Posted: 04 May 2016 08:00 PM PDT

via Flickr - Max Power
via Flickr – Max Power

Some of these are pretty intense. You have been warned. 

1. Giving Them What They Want

Fulfilling other people’s fetishes. Yeah, thats a fetish. I have a couple things on my list of will never do [scat, blood, other biohazards] but past that I’m willing to try usually.

Nothing turns me on more than having my partner’s eyes widen in near-shock as I spontaneously do something he’s often thought of but never done.

2. Fur Is For Sissies!

Being totally tied up and savaged. I prefer handcuffs with no fur on them. Fur is for sissies!

3. Halfway Only

Half undressed. It’s always a shame in porn when they wear a sexy outfit, then just take it off.

4. ISO Dominant Male

I like to be dominated. I like it when a guy has his way with me. He might pull my hair while he takes me, or just tell me what to do in bed. Or maybe he has me lie still while he touches me, bringing me close to climax, but making me wait for permission to cum. Spanking, light bondage, etc is all in.

God, I need to get laid… the problem is I keep finding guys who just aren’t very dominant.

5. Woah!

Sending my younger friends into the past where I know its a complete possibility they will end up getting some from their mom.

6. Stockings

Girl in Stockings…and nothing else.

That’s all, I’ll be going now.

7. Glade?

As a teen I had a fetish for a particular brand of air freshener.

Gave me an instant hard-on.

Now that’s messed up.

8. Sleepy Lovin’

I’ve got a thing for sleeping girls. Yes, it’s weird, but I never acted on it until my current girlfriend.

She’s into it, though, and sometimes as a special treat, she’ll get super wasted and pass out, or take heavy duty sleeping pills and tell me to fuck her while she’s out cold.

9. Getting Off On Drama

Pretty banal for me, but I’m a sucker for context.

If I just go and have sex, whether its pretty powerful or just sport fucking, thats great.

But if there is some story or some event that surrounds it, not necessarily romantic but just exceptional, that gets me off immediately. Dramatic, I suppose.

This is what Harlequin makes it’s cash off, I suspect.

10. Nickelodeon Fetish

I’m bisexual and into BDSM, but the thing I consider weirdest is that I’m a wet and messy fetishist.

I like to see girls slimed, covered in mud, pied in the face, or just generally messy. Growing up with Nickelodeon was a strange and interesting experience…

11. Not Just Any Sweater

I love women who wear soft sweaters (angora, mohair, etc.). I don’t know what it is, but if a sexy woman is wearing a soft sweater, I’m immediately and irretrievably infatuated.

12. ISO Guys Who Don’t Think Anal Is Gross

I have a thing for anal, and yet, as a general rule, manage to find the only guys in the world who think it’s gross. Go figure…

13. Eating Ass

I have a huge fetish for eating ass, but shit scares me. It’s always awkward telling a girl “I want you to take a shower and scrub your butt so that I can ram my tongue in your ass.”

14. Pegging

Just women who like to take control. Not bondage, but where they know what they want and will take it. If this includes certain, um, strapped on things or not is cool with me.

15. “Can Do It For Hours”

Cunnilingus. I love love LOVE going down on women, and can do it for hours. I often love it more than fucking, and love it more than getting head. There’s nothing I love more than women who REALLY appreciate it.

16. Life Saving Health Care

I like to watch videos where doctors and paramedics try to resuscitate fat men who are having heart attacks.

17. Not Real Violence But Almost

I love wearing skirts and just a small t-shirt, no underwear, and then having a man push me up against a wall and just have his way with me. So, almost like rape, I guess. No real violence, though. But the whole “I’m having sex with you and there is nothing you can do about it” turns me on.

I guess I have a slight thing for BDSM. I’ve learned that I’m submissive with boys, but nearly always dominant with girls. It doesnt bother me, it’s just how it is.

18. Public Nudity

Not so weird, but I am absolutely enthralled with public nudity, whether it is in a crowded public area or secluded mountain trail, and whether it is nonsexual or public humiliation/bondage. On that note, girls that flash poorly (pull shirt down, turn around for the camera, then pull shirt back up) or completely spreading themselves is an instant turn off.

19. Transforming Into The Other Gender

Am I the only one that likes the idea of transforming into a woman (I’m a man) and having wild sex? It started out as a fetish for purely lesbian sex, evolved into a fetish involving myself taking part in lesbian sex (obviously as a woman), and these days it can involve myself as a woman having sex with guys and even pregnancy as well (one of my more normal fetishes is pregnant women and insemination in general, so of course it factors in here).

Strange thing is that I’m not gay, or even feminine. The idea of having sex with a man as a man is completely unappealing to me and so is getting a sex change — there’s nothing appealing to me about artificial women (often too ugly, don’t actually function sexually as women etc). It’s all about being a fully functional woman, or more recently a “female” hermaphrodite.

I believe the term for my fetish is autogynephilia. It’s really my only active fetish these days, the rest are offshoots.

Also, I should note another strange thing: I have a perfectly healthy sex life with my fiancee. I rarely fantasize about being a woman unless I’m masturbating alone.

20. Still A Fetish?

Biting. Is that too normal to be a fetish nowadays?

21. Make That Money, Baby

I get turned on by women with MBAs.

22. A Musician’s Fetish

I like my women built, son. It’s so frustrating when my friends and i are scoping out a chick and no one else notices the ass. But not just the ass– the angle it makes with the small of the back. and the rate at which the small of the back arcs into the back.

Also, if you bang on her ass like a bongo, there needs to be a decent sound. that’s how you know it’s ripe, like a watermelon. Her hip bones should make a good woodblock, and her thighs should just have just the right amount of tension to get that kwwww sound.

23. It’s Tiring To Always Be In Charge

Pegging. Not femdom though, that doesn’t do anything for me. Occasionally I get that itch and would like to have it scratched by my girlfriend.

It’s tiring always having to be the top.

24. Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!

Once in the name of fantasy fulfillment:

I swallowed… out of a shot glass.

25. Objectify Me

I like being objectified and I like it rough. Me and lady gaga seem to enjoy the same things.

26. Anatomy Is Everything

Well defined collar bone and tendon on inner thigh = heaven.

27. A Difficult To Bring Up Fetish

Expansion fetish here: basically it means I like girls who are going through some kinda transformation process. Originally started out with girls turning into animals and anthro animals, got sick of the animal part, and now I’m more into chicks whose boobs are growing or if their bodies are changing or growing in general… Never told a partner this, seems to hard to work into a sex conversation.

28. Shaved, But Not Down There

Bald women…I adore them. Luckily I have developed enough game over the years that every woman I have dated longer than a few weeks has shaved her head. Honestly most women seem to think about it at some point and I think when they find out they have steady sex until they can grow it back out they go for it. It can go badly though so be warned.

29. “Roaming”

I’m a big fan of hands. I like a nice pair of large, manly hands roaming all over my body.

Gotta go.

30. We Save It For Weeks

Mine is cum. Not just merely facials (which I love), but anything to do with cum. Bukkake, gokkun (drinking), cum on clothes, in hair, on food, etc.

It’s so intense that my girlfriend and I will actually save up my spunk for weeks on end by freezing it. Then, we’ll thaw it out and have our own mini-bukkake.

We’ll take the thawed cum and smear it on each other. She will dip her tits into it and I will lick it off, I’ll dip my cock into it and have her give me a blowjob, we cover her tits in it and I titty fuck her, etc. etc.

I would eventually love to be in an actual bukkake with her (so the cum is warm and fresh), but the logistics behind that are staggering (guys who want to cum on a girl probably wouldn’t be interested in cumming on another guy and guys who want to cum on another guy probably wouldn’t be interested in cumming on a girl; plus all the other issues you deal with).

I didn’t even mention our “cummy shirt.”

She will wear this small, blue shirt for me to cum on, then she will wear it around while it dries, then it goes away without being washed. So far it has about 15-20 loads on it.

31. Weight Gain

Weight gain. Yeah, I know- this one is really weird. The most common time this comes up is if someone grumbles that they gained some weight, or they’re stuffed, or their pants don’t fit. Sometimes I watch shows like The Biggest Loser and get really aroused looking at the before and after (imagining them reversed, of course), or thinking about the people who were kicked off the show and will gain it all back. The most unrealistic fantasy is my s/o somehow getting fatter and fatter as I have sex with them.

32. VERY Rough Fantasies

I know that asphyxiation is usually something that stimulates men, but I get extremely turned on when my current boyfriend chokes me while we are intimate. Although I have never actually been sexually abused, I often fantasize about being raped or put in extremely terrifying situations. The whole BDSM realm really interests me.

33. “Make Golda Meir Proud”

As a Jew, one of my biggest fantasies has always been to sleep with a German girl. And I want her to yell at me in German the whole time, like only an angry kraut could. And I want to give her the hate-fucking of a lifetime, something that would make Golda Meir proud.

34. Take Away My Right To Choose This

Being a rather dominant personality, I constantly fantasize about men who take charge. I want you to back me against a door, put one hand around my throat and shove the other one into my panties. I want you to take away my right to choose this. Unsurprisingly, I’m also into being tied up, blindfolded, and lovingly flogged. I’ve only recently come out of the closest as a pervert and I haven’t had much luck finding boyfriends who are into it. If I were a man and my girlfriend wanted me to tie her up I’d fuckin’ jizz in my pants before she even pulled out the ties. Oh well.

35. Good Jealousy

I want to watch my girlfriend fucked by another man. Just thinking about it turns me on. It would make me view her in a 100% sex-object like way, like watching a pornstar get fucked. It would also make me jealous, but not in a bad way. More like a “Oh yeah? Now let me show you how its really done” kind of way.

I thought I could never tell her this, but we recently had a big night out a club and wound up taking some E’s. In a fit of ecstasy-fueled honesty, I admitted my fantasy to her and she got super excited by the idea. She even wants to do the reverse and watch me fuck another woman.

36. Dress Up Play

I’m male and enjoy fully dressing up as a female rubberdoll with big torpedo tits, latex mask and ballet boots.

37. Tee Hee

Tickling. Either doing the tickling or watching it.

38. The Struggle Is Real

I like men to give me a pedicure while I whip them. It’s a hard life.

39. Mind Control

I have a fetish about people being either drugged, hypnotized, tasped (read Larry Niven) or otherwise made completely helpless and subservient to the will of another, but they like it despite themselves. I thought I was the only one like this until I happened upon (that’s “mind control”).

There are some movie scenes that totally get me hot, like the scene in Rush where the heroin dealer makes Jason Patric shoot up Jennifer Jason Leigh to prove that they’re not cops (which they are).

The look on her face after the drug takes effect is just priceless. Paradise.

PS – I’m a female, for whatever that’s worth.

40. Pee

I have a bizarre fascination with piss. Sometimes I feel great about embracing it and sometimes it’s the most embarrassing thing ever.

41. Armpits

I don’t really obsess over them or have some collection of armpit porn or anything but they turn me on

I love my girlfriends armpits, the way they smell, they way they look, shaved, unshaved, stubbly, whatever. I’ve came on her armpits before and fucked them with lube.

42. Cavernous Voices

Men with deep voices arouse me.

Alan Rickman, Jeremy Irons- Hell, even voices lower than that. I’m kind of surprised that there’s not a fetish website for this sort of thing.

43. Being Ignored

Fucking from behind, but she’s completely disinterested. Like she’s doing paperwork or something.

44. Insemination

Nothing gets me off quicker than a man coming inside me.

45. Chastity

Not the Christian kind. The medieval kind. Except the dude gets locked up, not the girl.

I am so happy to have found a girlfriend who not only likes it, but LOVES it. She’ll lock me up, make me please her, then tease me or make me do slavework or something else.

After a few days, all I can think about is how much I want her, how god damned horny I am, and what I can do to serve her or make her happy.

I’ve gone as long as 3 weeks without being able to touch myself.

46. Big Baby

I’m an adult baby. I’m into being diapered, dominated, and babied by someone. I’ve got tons of paraphernalia including bottles, an adult sized pacifier, tons of diapering supplies and diapers, stuffed animals, and onesies and other baby clothes. My boyfriend even has an adult sized nursery at his house for me. So I think I win this thread.

47. Family Affairs

I have a specific and presumably uncommon incest-related fetish. Basically, I like porn featuring the son (whom I identify with) fucking his mother while his father is an active participant in the proceedings. I like it even better if it’s a swap featuring the son fucking his mother and his father fucking his daughter or his son’s girlfriend/wife.

48. Loves Being Abandoned

(Female) I’m into typical bondage, spanking and choking stuff, but what really gets me going is being restrained and gagged and then abandoned. I like it when he goes and makes himself some food and comes back and makes me watch him eat it while I’m unable to move or speak…and then maybe left alone for a while longer waiting for him to choose when I’m ready. The best is when there is the risk of being found by someone else this way.

49. Highly Specific

My other fetish? Huge natural lactating breasts squirting milky goodness all over my body while being fisted after a good enema. All the while having my balls and member tied up together. It helps if all parties are thoroughly shaven and wearing lubricated latex corsets and red thigh high-heeled women’s boots.

50. Bored Of Blow Jobs

I fantasize at blowing a guy who’s completely disinterested in the affair — like I’m under a desk and he’s reading or doing work while I’m sucking him off underneath.

51. Defilement Of Innocence

I have posted about this before, but guys with Asperger’s syndrome turn me on incredibly. There is something so sweetly gentle and innocent about them that just makes me want to… DEFILE them.

52. Eat Me, Drink Me

I’m into furry stuff. I’m bisexual when it comes to furry porn, but not with actual people (totally straight in real life).

I’m also a voraphile: this means I enjoy fantasizing about people (and animals, furries, etc.) swallowing me, and me swallowing them (occasionally). It’s mostly the “being in the throat” that turns me on. Also, large bellies (mostly from someone being in the stomach); this is probably an extension of the vore fetish and is sort of a pseudo-pregnancy-fetish.

53. “Go For It”

Feeder fetish. Not to the extent of the the movie feed or anything like that, I just really like fat girls and I like to watch girls indulge in food. I always encourage girls, even those that I have no interest in, to eat. If I’m at a restaurant or cafeteria with a girl and they are trying to decide between two things I’ll suggest both. Or if they’re contemplating dessert I’ll tell them to go for it.

54. Big Eyes

I love girls with big eyes. I like to take my dick and poke them in the eyes, although I do it gentle. I know it might be frowned upon but I can’t help it.

55. Getting A Woman Off Over And Over And Over…

I really love getting a woman off. I know…it sounds cliche…but seeing a woman’s face when she cums and knowing that I caused it is fucking awesome I have always had a hard time reaching orgasm due to a lack of sensation so I made it into a challenge to see how many times I could get a woman off before I was finally able to. I will do just about anything to make a woman cum. I can go for hours. I once made an ex cum 17 times in 2 hours (Aprox every 7 minutes) before she couldn’t go on any more. I don’t even need to cum during these sessions as my satisfaction lies in her satisfaction.

56. Humiliating Transformations

Men forcibly being physically transformed into animals.

The more humiliating, the better.

ALSO men growing boobs against their will.

This is paired with a nose fetish.

I’m fun…

57. Poop Lover

I’m a coprophile (that’s the ol’ scat thing).

Some points: A: Contrary to popular opinion about people who like this sort of thing; I’m a very normal, soccer playing, musician/programmer. I like going out and getting drunk, I like socialising. I’m not socially inept. I have perfect hygeine, and I’m even somewhat good looking (no Brad Pitt, but at least 6/10 :]).

B: I don’t need it to get off. Normal sex is fun, too. Also, I didn’t ‘turn into’ liking it from all those shock videos on the ‘net. It doesn’t consume my sexuality. I want the same thing in a person that everyone wants; like smarts, funny etc., and I want to get married and stay monogamous one day.

C: Call me sick if you like; but it’s not like that. ;) Not gonna explain it all, but to me it’s a very loving thing.

Ciao o/

58. More Common Than She Thinks

I like to watch myself giving head on film WHILE I give head. “Here’s one I prepared earlier”, or something in that vein or similar.

59. Damn

I want to be fucked with a gun.

60. Lycra

For me, its Lycra. Started out as one-piece swimsuits (I suspect from spending my formative years at the local swimming pool). The idea that there was this completely naked girl right next to me, covered with a thin layer of stretchy…..

Well, you get the idea.

Since then, it’s branched out to anything lycra. Gym wear, leggings, catsuits. Luckily I have a girlfriend who is up for indulging my kink. I have quite the wardrobe for her.

Oh, and also-girls completely naked except for sneakers. Drives me mad, and I have no idea why!

61. Woah

I like ejaculating on my own face.

62. Oil

Oiled up flesh. Hardly anything turns me on more than the idea getting greased up and having an oil wrestling match.

63. Dat Throat Tho

Here’s a strange one. When a woman swallows. And I don’t even necessarily mean it that way – if a woman is drinking something in a certain way, or swallows something whole, or gulps audibly, there’s just something about that which seems incredibly sexy to me. I know it’s really weird, but am I alone on this?

64. Look At Me While You Do That

I used to have a bf who would fuck me while I pretended to sleep… it got me off because it was a weird way of objectifying me, I guess. Also, if I had my way, I would love to watch a guy fuck someone else while only looking at me. TC mark

13 Women Reveal What Their Man Does That Makes Them Drop Their Panties Immediately

Posted: 04 May 2016 07:00 PM PDT

Alf Santos
Alf Santos

1. “When he appreciates the things I do for him. It’s amazing what a small thank you will do.” —Melissa, 25


2. “When he breathes on my body before he kisses it, OMG. It’s like the hottest tease I’ve ever experienced.” —Kaycee, 24


3. “If he does the dishes after I cook, he knows he’s getting laid.” —Ashley, 26


4. “After he gets out of the shower and walks around with just a towel on, it gets me in the mood. Especially since he always showers in the morning, I’m a horny morning person.” —Morgan, 24


5. “When he kisses my cheek for no reason. It’s the sweetest thing, and sweet has a way with me.” —Britt, 26


6. “Anytime I see him hold a baby, I’m like OMG please have mine.” —Elaina, 25


7. “Sexting. I know he isn’t around to enjoy the panties being dropped, but I enjoy myself. Me, myself, and I. It’s actually a compliment to him that his sexts are good enough to make me masturbate.” —Nelli, 25


8. “If he starts playing Rihanna’s new album, oh baby. ‘Kiss It Better,’ panties to the floor, for sure.” —Dana, 27


9. “He has these one pair of jeans that make his butt look so cute. When he wears them I just want to rip them off of him.” —Cynthia, 24


10. “Kisses on the neck, that does it for me, but they can’t be slobbery. I want you to kiss my neck, not drool on it.” —Nicole, 25


11. “Sounds so superficial, but if he buys me a gift, preferably something I can wear, not eat. Me dropping my panties isn’t a thank you, it’s involuntary. You buy me jewelry, my panties drop, it’s like a chemical reaction I can’t control.” —Lindsey, 27


12. “When we both get all dressed up, might be for a wedding, or a night club, or wherever we’re going. When he’s in a suit and tie, and I’m in a hot dress with my makeup and hair done, I definitely want to have sex. We both only look that good every so often, have to take full advantage of it.” —Alex, 26


13. “If he decides to hop in my shower unexpectedly. I mean obviously we’re both already naked, but when he catches me off guard, it’s like oh he must really want me if he can’t wait for me to be done and wait his turn.” —Janelle, 25 TC mark

This Is What Your Guy Is Like In Bed, Based On His Zodiac Sign

Posted: 04 May 2016 06:00 PM PDT

wendy liu
wendy liu

Ladies, Gentlemen (and everyone in between), please do me a favor and pour yourself a drink, turn on "Gimme Gimme Gimme" by ABBA, and feast your eyes on this appetizing astrological dish. Bred somewhere in between the men's luxury lifestyle world, and the highly active dating life of a single gal in Manhattan, I give you a saucy little horoscope that shines the spotlight on men. Whether you regard it as mystical garbage or brilliant insight, if one thing is for sure: it's entertaining. It also comes with the disclaimer that I assume no actual responsibility for your futures whatsoever. I'm not an astrologer. I'm an observer and entertainer of these concepts, to be taken lightly (facts and horoscopes are not exactly married). Is there truth to this? That's for you to decide.

If you happen to fit the stereotypical mold of your sign, congratulations. If you don't identify with it at all, good for you just the same.

On another note, if your lovers know what's good for them, they'll read up on this. Without further adieu, please allow astrology to assist your love life…


(March 21st to April 19th)

I doubt I've ever met an Aries man who couldn't charm the pants right off of me. That's not to say I submitted every time, but Sir, you are trouble. Put it this way: wherever there's an Aries man, opportunity awaits. His charm has rivals muttering, "Oh, it's not fair" in his general direction. He seems to always have a large collection of admirers at his disposal, which is annoying to anyone trying to take him seriously. We'd better be pretty damn sure of ourselves if we want to end up with him because an Aries man rarely changes his ways. At worst, he has a tendency to be self-involved to a fault; a one-man show. At best, he is an absolute demon in the bedroom; a burning, churning, cosmic explosion of star dusted superiority. His poster child Mr. Hugh Hefner, will tell you all about it. The best advice here would be that if sex were a scary neighborhood, he shouldn't go there alone. Just remember, Mr. Aries, there are two people here. Giving is receiving.


(April 20th to May 21st)

Is it just me, the industry, or are Taurean men running ramped through the streets of New York City? This seems to be the most dominant sign in town. It's either that or that he is just the most outspoken about his sign. A true alpha male, he's aggressive with a sort of discretion that most people find intriguing and attractive. When he enters a room, heads will turn (and sometimes roll). "Who is that?" is the common inner dialogue in response to his presence. If not for his devastating good looks (he's usually "really, really ridiculously good looking"), then for the way he commands attention with subtle intensity. A master of deals, discussions, and decisions, he gives us a real run for our money. He takes care of business and the same goes for sex. He's just a busy kind of guy. While he tends to take on a number of projects at once, he doesn't forget to stop and smell the roses (or the weed). On that note, maybe he shouldn't smoke so much of it! Just saying.


(May 22nd to June 21st)

If it takes two to tango, then we'll do the horizontal mambo with this guy any day. Double the pleasure, double the fun, is the name of the game for the exciting Mr. Gemini. A man of great versatility, few signs have as dynamic a personality as he does. His bedroom escapades are no different either. Every love scene with him is an Oscar winning performance. Mr. Gem is the Bugatti Veyron of the dating world. He has a speeding problem and will blow through lovers like nobody else. If (and only if) he finds someone worthy, he will slow down his roll. The fact that he is so open-minded makes him a lot of fun. He also has a way with words. They don't call him the Wordsmiths of the horoscope for nothing! His words will cut like a knife or slay like a giant, depending on his mood. Yes, moods. He has many. Try to keep up. However, he is easy to love. Eccentric and clever, we want him at every party. Sometimes villainized and other times glorified, there is never a dull moment with Gems. "If you're not having fun, it's your own damn fault" would be your mantra. Let's pillow talk later. Call me.


(June 22nd to July 22nd)

Crabs assemble! Anyone who actually thinks they can assemble a group of crabs is hilarious because Mr. Cancer always goes his own way. He's not a lone wolf but he's not a follower either. He mingles in a variety of social networks (and lovers), and rarely hangs out with people who are just like him. He likes variety and is bored easily. True, for crabby gentlemen everywhere, life is a luxurious voyage of wining, dining, and effortless winning. Dirk Diggler put it best when he sang, "You're a winner!" in Boogie Nights. When he wins us over, we are at the mercy of his boyish charms. He's got us doing kinky things we never dreamt of doing. Forgive the stereotype, but he always seems to be really good in the kitchen too. He puts the corny old adage "What's cooking, good looking" back into our vocabulary. He's passionate about good hospitality, and it's a mutual exchange that suits him best. Even if he is a softy on the inside, he's got a rather hard exterior.  Anatomically speaking, that's not a bad thing at all (wink-wink).


(July 23rd to August 22nd)

Few types of men are more in touch with their primal instincts as Mr. Leo is, and if a lion's pride is a powerful thing, then he's as fierce as they come. For the electric Leo man, there are many, many admirers. Confident and talented, he has serious sexual prowess. His only hope is to live up to your fantasies of him. He'll eat us for dinner if we let him. Naughty boy! For Mariah Carey fans everywhere, it was most likely a Leo she sang about in "Dream lover, come rescue me." His naturally vibrant and magnetic personality is hard to ignore. He is infectious! Once he has plagued our hearts, we don't want to be cured. Sometimes he can be intimidating, but as we get to know him, he's just a cuddly kitten. At worst he's a stage hog, and at best he's a born performer and natural porn star (whether he makes it a profession or not). The only thing holding him back would be a bad case of stage fright. Just relax, sir. We believe in you. You're a star. Let's shag like minxes.


(August 23rd to September 22nd)

If being a good guy is cool, then consider him Miles Davis. There's none more devoted than the Virgoan guy. He's a true romantic who will give his heart and soul to the right person. Lucky for you, he harbors no commitment phobias whatsoever. He's an honest, sincere, and stand-up kind of guy. While honesty comes with his territory, getting to know him is another story. He doesn't open himself up to just anyone. He tends to be guarded and a bit on the judgmental side. He will scour the Earth before settling on anything less than what he thinks he deserves. He may come off as unobtainable and inaccessible but that's part of his appeal. People tend to admire him from afar because he has an out of reach air about him. He requires someone that he can see eye to eye with. When the dating market is scarce, he doesn't compromise himself. Patience is a virtue that he does indeed possess. There are so many people who would love to go mattress dancing with him. He has more options than he realizes, he is just plain picky. Good for him. Stick to your guns Mr. Virgo! Stay strong. Slow and steady wins the race.


(September 23rd to October 22nd)

I feel like being a Libra is like being in a cult. Are you in the Libran circle of trust? Lord hath no mercy if you're not. You do not want these guys on your bad side. For as dedicated, doting, and focused as they are (in love and in life), is as relentless as they are to succeed in everything they do. That includes driving you into the ground if you cross them. A worldly, educated, well-rounded guy like Mr. Libra is typically top dog somewhere in the professional world. He'll see to that. Just remember, Mr. Libra is always right. With the balance that this sign suggests, is it any small wonder that they usually live up to the pressure? There is little this guy can't handle, and he makes an excellent problem solver. Responsible and dependable, you can turn to him for anything. He's got a hell of a lot to offer and a level head on his shoulders. Just don't cross him because he may be prone to holding a grudge. Have mercy, sir. You're sexy when you're mad.


(October 23rd to November 22nd)

Playing into double standards and gender wars, Scorpio would be the most controversial. This is where guys are being scrutinized, as opposed to girls (usually it's the other way around). While Ms. Scorpio tends to be valued for her sensuality and provocative nature, Mr. Scorpio gets a bad rap as a womanizer and playboy. Touché. Scorpios everywhere are typically donned as the sexual Mt. Olympus of the horoscope. Too bad the science of sex comes down to raw chemistry (to each his own). Mr. Scorpio has an insatiable sexual appetite, but the riddle of his existence thrives in extremes. Whatever it is about him; strengths, weaknesses, quirks, nuances, etc. it's going to be extreme. Sir, you are INTENSE. He loves things that are shiny and new but is prone to scandal. For anyone who ever got burned by a Scorpio, it's the oldest story in the book. Indulge, indulge, indulge, but just remember one thing, life is shorter than you think. Here's to hoping your Mr. Scorpio more than just a hot minute (and that minute is hot).


(November 23rd to December 21st)

"What do you mean, oh… when you nod your head yes, but you wanna say no…" comes to mind with this guy. If I had $1 for every Sagittarian I've ever met who contradicted himself, I'd be bidding on prime real estate in Central Park East. You are the "Lost Boys" of the modern world. Sagittarian men live with an eternal adolescence and stay young at heart even in their old age. A playful lover who is always down to explore, he loves to scope out new prospects. Is he faithful? Let's put his status there at "grade pending" because loyalty is a crapshoot with him. It's hit and miss. He doesn't discriminate race, body type, age, or gender (on occasion) when it comes to lovers, so consider him among the world's most experienced lovers. As playful as he is, he has a hitch. Sometimes he takes it too far. Need an example? He is the type to break up with someone just for the makeup sex. He should tread lightly in the event that someone comes along who takes it all too seriously. You know what they say; revenge is a dish served cold.


(December 22nd to January 20th)

What is Mr. Capricorn supposed to do with all that energy? Don't worry; he will channel it in productive ways. Focused and determined, he is completely capable of meeting his goals. In other words, he knows how to get what he wants. He is not susceptible to foolish jerking off (pun intended). He's a smart guy with a resistance to temptation and vigor for fun. It just depends on what he sets his mind to. "Eye on the prize" would be his mantra. His bar is set high so if you want to be with him, you better hope you measure up to his high standards. He will involve himself with people who are nothing short of extraordinary. He's a social climber, a clever businessman, and strategist. He knows how to use his resources. He also knows how to use his body as a vessel for ultimate pleasure. Let's call him "the professional". After you've been with him, you'll feel as though you've been with the king. Yes, it's true; the sexy, able-bodied mountain climber of your dreams is none other than Mr. Capricorn. You are the real deal, sir.


(January 21st to February 18th)

Right now, Aquarians everywhere are singing the theme "Let's party like it's 1999." It's no exaggeration in saying that Mr. Aquarius is a strange breed. Said to be the great humanitarians of the zodiac, we find him doing good things for Mother Earth and it's dwellers. Ambassadors of going green, preserving the Earth, and fighting for justice, he is a soldier of human welfare. While he is known for being good hearted and righteous, he can also be a loose canon when it comes to relationships. He prides himself on his freedom and won't be caught dead in a conventional union. There's nothing he hates more than being tied down, yet he equally abhors loneliness. That's quite the conundrum. He is prone to a perpetual cycle of intense, romantic collision followed by solitude due to counteracting habits. George Peppard as Paul Varjak in Breakfast at Tiffany's put it best when he said "You call yourself a free spirit, a “wild thing,” and you’re terrified somebody’s gonna stick you in a cage. Well baby, you’re already in that cage. You built it yourself." Yikes. When they say there's no hope for him, it's garbage. As he ages, old habits die-hard and he develops an appreciation for stability. He may have some regrets but there is also good news: his libido never wavers. Those lusty impulses he had as a teenager stay with him until the end of time. Lucky fella.


(February 19th to March 20th)

A personal favorite, Mr. Pisces lives on the border of bizarre and brilliant. From Kurt Cobain and Alexander McQueen to Albert Einstein and George Washington, Piscean men are capable of a great, many things. He is a force to be reckoned with. To expound on his virtues is to write the recipe of what legends are made of. Complex and as deep as the sea, he is romantic, tragic, prolific, and tormented all at once. Is there such a thing as his perfect match? He is so unique, that one would have to wonder if he would ever be satisfied. He tends to want what he can't have. He also has the talent of seeing through people's nonsense, to a point of reality that others may find too heavy to handle. Sometimes his life gets dark, but he is magical and don't let him forget it. Stay with us, lay with us, and let us satisfy you. You deserve the world. TC mark

Submit your astrology article to Thought Catalog here.

29 People Share The Creepiest Urban Legend From Their Hometown

Posted: 04 May 2016 05:45 PM PDT

Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Found on AskReddit.

1. Charlie No-Face

"When we lived in western Pennsylvania my uncle would always tell me about Charlie No-Face. He was in some kind of electrical accident as a kid that fried off his nose and his eyes. My uncle told my sister and I that if we were out at night, Charlie No Face would appear and try to steal our faces off. As it turns out, Charlie No Face was an actual guy named Raymond Robinson and he was in an accident that disfigured his face like that. But the ghost story part obviously wasn’t true. I’m reading other comments in this thread and it sounds like my uncle stole liberally from the Mexicans’ La Llorona."

2. Mothman

"Mothman. In a 13 months period between 1965-1966, the town of Point Pleasant, WV reported seeing a winged beast with big red eyes. The last report was the beast standing on the Silver Bridge. And then the silver bridge collapsed. The beast wasn’t reported again afterwards."

3. The flying woman who eats unborn children

"There is a creature in Filipino folklore that is a beautiful woman who detaches her torso from her lower body at night. Apparently her top half flies around landing on the rooftops where pregnant women are sleeping. It has a tongue that reaches down into the belly button of the pregnant woman and eats her unborn child. The only way to kill it is to find its lower half and put salt on it."

4. Clownman

"Clownman. I lived right outside Pittsburgh, PA as a teenager, in a little, poor, town called Swissvale. The next communities over are Rankin and Braddock, which are steel production heyday ghost towns that have been plagued with poverty. A strip of woods, lined by a train track follow the river upon which our communities reside. Right next to the river looms the decrepit abandoned steel mill I believe once called Carrie Furnace. As teenagers do, my friends and I used to cut through the park, across the tracks, and to the river to drink, smoke pots, and hang out. Eventually, we started exploring the steel mill. I loved it. The graffiti and sculptural artists, the wildlife that randomly took over, the bums who made it home, etc., all made it a worthwhile adventure. I became comfortable there. Then my friends told me about an abduction and rape of a teenager whose naked and bloodied body ended up strung up on a set of city steps. The killer was an insane man who dressed as a clown with a horrid, bloodstained mask. 'He lives in the woods and in the steel mill. He walks the tracks with a butcher knife he hasn’t even bothered to clean. Don’t come here alone.' I got into a fight with a boyfriend one night and stubbornly decided to walk alone from the river—across the tracks, and through the woods. I got to the tracks, turned and looked at the steel mill. Further down the tracks I saw a figure. I couldn’t see a face, but the baggy pants were rather clown like. I ran like you wouldn’t fucking believe. I’ve never felt fear like that before. It was probably a bum. But who takes chances with an urban legend like that?"

5. The savage albinos at the top of Mount Umunhum

"We have a mountain range where in from called Mount Umunhum. It’s said to be ridden with savage albinos up at the top. Now large parts of this mountain are just normal black top roads with houses. But as you drive further up the houses become more scarce and the Forrest becomes thicker. Eventually you’ll see a sign for the Umunhum peak where the savage albinos supposedly live. The creepy part is that it’s a dirt road and two cars cannot go up it at one time. And you can’t really turn around. My friends and I would always go up trying for look and explore around 2AM. We never got very far before turning around through the one side opening on the road which we were always terrified of because it was really difficult to maneuver it and would have been so easy for the savage albinos to get us. Apparently they drive around in a white truck and play tricks on people to get them to pull over before the others ambush you."

6. The Jersey Devil

"Along time ago in the Pine Barrens, a desolate empty place in the middle of a marsh. A pregnant mother was in the middle of giving birth to her 13th child. This was the worst birth of all her children, the unborn baby fought and tried to stay put, but the midwives were much stronger and had successfully birthed more troublesome babies in the past. The mother (Mama Leeds as she was known) couldn’t handle the pain, she screamed and cried as the weather outside went from a cool October night into a violent storm (thunder, lightning, rain and wind); it was almost as if the mother and the storm were one.

At the peak of the painful birth he mother cried out “This child is cursed!!! He has been laid by the Devils seed. I CURSE THIS CHILD!!! LET IT BE A DEVIL!!!” As she cursed the child, Mother Leeds passed out. Eventually the midwives brought her round and placed the child in her arms. He was a beautiful child, clean pink skin and chubby arms and face. But the child began crying, and as he cried his skin turned black and serpent like. Horns sprouted from his head and his body elongated. The chubby little fingers and toes melded into hooves and a tail began thrashing about.

Terror and chaos ensued, the demon child was now twice the size of a grown man and monstrous. The midwives were the first ones to be eaten before the devil went after his siblings and disappeared into the storm.

Thus begins the tale of The Jersey Devil.

7. The Pope Lick Monster

"We’ve got something around here called the ‘Pope Lick Monster’. Some type of goat/man creature. Legend is that he will lure you out onto the railroad crossing and you will fall to your death. A girl died just this week."

8. The 13 curves

"A friend of mine’s hometown has a length of road through some hills that winds around with 13 curves, Referred to as the '13 Curves.' Legend has it that near or on Halloween a couple who recently married sometime in the late 50’s early 60’s got into a car accident navigating the road. Now on Halloween if you drive the road at midnight, the bride, bloodied and glowing, appears before your car trying to get you to crash. The story changes by region, but having driven on the road on Halloween there is definitely a creepiness to it, also the road is very dangerous to drive at night, some turns are so sharp if you don’t slow down to 10 MPH you could easily lose control."

9. Purple Aki

"My area (Northern England) has a rumor of a man called Purple Aki, whose skin is so black it looks purple. He goes up to people that work out and says 'Hello Boys! Let me feel your muscles!,' makes them do a few squats then drags them into an alleyway. He then says 'Pop or Slash?' Pop is anal rape and Slash is carving the 'P.A.' onto your asscheeks and then anally raping you."

10. Charlie, the man who could never get off the train

"OK it’s not immediately scary but when you think about it, it is. Charlie; the man who had just enough money to get on the train but not enough money to get off. It’s supposedly the reason why the Boston MBTA cards are called Charlie Cards. It sounds silly, but imagine never being able to get off a train.(They used to charge a nickel to get off above ground.) You would pass by your stop every day but could never go home. You would become a prisoner on a goddamn train. Wasting away to nothing. That always scared the shit out of me when I was a kid."

11. The 'H' Man

"There is a local legend about a campsite I used to go camping at here in upstate New York. Legend says that there is a man they call 'The H Man' that lives out in the woods near the campsite. One year a group of Boy Scouts were camping out there and one of the boys went missing. They didn’t find him until they started packing up to go home, as they were cleaning up and packing up their belongings they found the missing kid. He was dead under one of the mattresses with an 'H' carved into his chest. They say when the H Man kills campers, he carves an H into your chest. Growing up camping here, all of us kids were terrified of the H Man. They said if you go exploring deep enough into the woods you can find his home. Well, there IS an abandoned house deep in the woods we found one time. (I was shitting my pants.) Creepy thing was, it was sooo deep in the woods but there was no roads leading to it, no paths leading to it. Just a single abandoned house. Sitting in the middle of the woods. If you go camping in Minerva NY, beware of the 'H Man.'"

12. The Whistler

"We have one in Venezuela called 'El Silbón' (The Whistler) typical of the wetland plains and prairies regions we call ‘Llanos.’ Description is usually of a very emaciated man dressed in cowboy’s (llanero) rags with a wide brim hat that hides his skeletal face. He roams the countryside and patches of bush at night, with drooping shoulders, downcast stare and a heavy bag full of bones and half decomposed remains slung over his back.

There are two distinctive features, however, that make him particular: he continuously whistles, a high chord progression C-D-E-F-G-A-B-C that goes higher in tune with every note – and is unnaturally tall and strong, with some accounts describing him as towering over 6 meters in height.

His origin is not clear, with some tales stating him as an accursed parricide. But whatever he is, is feared by lone travelers. Specially drunk or unfaithful men that travel through the country. Story has it that his ominous whistle is suddenly heard very loud and close, yet the source cannot be pinpointed—and contrary to logic, when the sound gets lower and appears more distant it is an indication of his immediate proximity.

He will then kill by strangling or by concussion and devour the victims and throw the bones in the bag. Can be seen occasionally wading over the high walls of haciendas/fincas and honest prayer should keep him away."

13. A midget-sized creature that lives in the woods and steals children

"There was a tale in Andros (Bahamas) that there used to be a midget-sized creature that lived in the woods and would steal children (as I was told). Then, recently, they found evidence of there being a midget sized creature that lived in the woods. Turns out it was a three foot tall ground dwelling owl….I heard about the child stealin’ from locals when I lived there. It’s not mentioned in the wiki."

14. A fertility god whose dick is so big he has to tie it around his waist like a belt

"There’s this one Paraguayan legend about this God with a huge dick that impregnates women. Basically he just goes around with his monster dick fucking all the single women in Paraguay and gets them pregnant. His name is Kurupi. His dick is so big he has to tie it around his waist like a belt."

15. The ghosts of the snowmobilers

"I used to be a Boy Scout. The creepy thing about this story was that it’s actually true. At a camp I used to go to a few years ago, one of our senior patrol leaders told most of the troop that back in the 70’s, there were these two guys who were on snowmobiles and they were riding on some of the trails. They had to go to the bathroom and they went to the small shed that had a few toilets in it. But with the amount of snow that had fallen, it collapsed and the two guys died. Their bodies where found when the snow melted in the spring and legend has it, in the winter time at the camp when nobody is their, you can see their ghosts roaming the area. I asked some of the older staff there and two guys actually did die like 40 years ago in the camp's old bathroom."

16. Burning the Ouija board

"The stories of Ouija boards always mess with me a little. My mother told a story of when she and her friends used one. After messing around with it mom’s friends asked playfully asks when she’s going to die. It spells out tomorrow, she starts freaking out and then without a question it’s starts spelling goodbye. My mom’s friend starts crying my mother said she was could see her hands die. She could see bone and rotting flesh slowly creeping up. They burned it that night with some holy water. Pretty religious upbringing so grandma had to get her bottle to help horrified teenage girls."

17. The evil words on the tombstone

"I live out in a rural area that was settled a long time ago. The story goes that in the days of the first settlement there was one teenage girl who was very into the supernatural and began to experiment in witchcraft. At the same time that she was experimenting with witchcraft several villagers noticed that suspicious things were happening. They had a bad harvest that year, several people had gotten sick and a small boy even died.

The villagers were lamenting their hardships when somehow it came out that a teenage girl was experimenting with dark magic. The villagers became enraged and rallied to have the girl burned at the stake. They asked her if she had any last words. She asked that her last words be put on her tombstone and she recited a long speech.

These words were placed on her tombstone. It is said that anyone who reads the words out loud at her grave will have misfortunes for a short time after reading the words and that if you curse her name that any nearby churches will burn down.

I have visited this grave. I don’t believe in the supernatural but I can’t explain what happened. My friends and I went to the grave. We had been telling ghost stories beforehand so we were all a bit jumpy. We approached the grave late at night close to midnight. There was a horse farm nearby and we could hear the horses whinny. It was a rather bright night as the moon was out in full. We arrived at the grave and one of my friends reads the text on the tombstone in full. Nothing happened.

Until we heard a very loud and seemingly very close neigh from the nearby horses along with the thundering of hooves running, which at the time sounded incredibly closer than it should have possibly been. I will am not ashamed to say I and my friends squealed and ran as fast we could to the car. I jumped up front while the driver jumped in. He could not turn on his car. In the panic two girls jumped on my lap and everyone was screaming we needed to get out of there. I slammed the door. Little did I know one of the girls had her hand still on the outside of the car. I slammed the door on her hand. The door was locked even though no one had locked the doors beforehand. I had to manually unlock the door as this girl screamed with her crushed hand in the door and then I opened it. The car started. The lights came on. I shut the door again and we drove off.

Luckily this was a car that did not have metal around the window so while it was painful it didn’t exactly break anything. I will say though that whether it was all in our heads or if there was something more at play I will never know. I do know that I don’t plan on going back anytime soon."

18. The wooden crow that flies

"There was a cemetery about a mile from where I grew up (in the middle of nowhere) that dates back to around 1850. Everyone who died in the area was buried there for a while, but it’s been owned by one family for about 60 years, so they’re the only ones who use it now.

One of the graves has a big crow carved out of wood, I think, and painted black. It’s ominous as hell and always creeped me out as a kid. It was always there, brooding over the grave.

We drove by one Sunday on the way to church, and the crow fucking turned and looked at me! I almost shit my pants. It flapped its wings and flew away. I swear to god, that fucking thing was perched there in the same position without moving for years, until one day it flew away. I never saw it again. I still have no idea what the fuck the deal was. Was it a real bird that always happened to land in the same spot and perch there perfectly still while I was watching, day after day, year after year? Or was it a carved bird that I hallucinated flying away? Or was it something else?

Either way, I’m not setting foot in that goddamn cemetery ever. And I’m still irrationally afraid of crows."

19. The wooden statue of a monk

"In my old town by the Church there was a wooden statue of a monk. It was really tall and thin, and the wood was all cracked. All the kids in the neighborhood had a tale about it, why it was there, who he was etc. The one that stood out in my mind is that if you stood with your back to him at night he’d visit you later. Nobody had the bottle to stand there for long enough, so we’d never find out.

Then there was a story he appeared on an episode of Strange But True, which was a show on ITV that talked about ghost stories and the like. Apparently an old woman noticed he wasn’t where he should be and was in fact feeding the ducks close by.

But I recently I found out it was made in 1992, only about 3-4 years before I heard the stories."

20. The haunted house and the rope

"One of my friends told me this a long time ago; she heard it from someone else (obviously).

A group of guys, high school friends, make a bet involving a local haunted house. One guy says he can spend the entire night inside of it without leaving. His friends take him up on it, but just to make sure he doesn’t pull a fast one, they insist he be tied to the upstairs banister with a rope. Guy agrees. They tie him up and leave.

Next morning they come back to get him. He’s a little out of it and says it was fine, but that’s all he says. He wins the bet and collects.

Life continues; the friends finish high school. All go away to college except haunted-house guy. He stays around in town, moves from dead-end job to dead-end job. He doesn’t go out and loses touch with the others over the next couple of years.
One day the friends hear that haunted-house guy has killed himself. This comes as a huge shock and they all have questions. They are all horrified to learn that he hung himself with the rope they used to tie him up that night in the haunted house."

21. The midget-sized creature near the castle

"I can’t remember the name of the creature. It was said when wandering uphill towards the castle in my hometown at night, a midget-sized creature would jump on your back and cling to your shoulders until you reach the castle moat. he then would just let loose and get lost. Been told this as a child, you can’t imagine me watching out at this hill even for years. In retrospective this little guy seems like a lazy ass bitch demanding free rides home."

22. The bloody leg print on the Colonel's tombstone

"The following story is part truth and part legend.

Many tourists have visited Bucksport Cemetery in Maine because of a supposed curse. The man who was the victim of this curse actually lived and died in Maine. Colonel Jonathan Buck fought in the American Revolutionary War. He formed the Fifth Colonial Regiment.

Later he founded 'Buckstown,' which became known as Bucksport, Maine. He died in 1879 but not before, according to legend his mistress cursed him. Some state there is visual proof even today that this curse lives on.

The Bucksport curse was first mentioned in an article in The Cambridge City Tribune written by J. O. Whittamore in 1899.

As the story goes Colonel Buck had a mistress by the name of Ida Black. The two were happy until Ida's looks began to fade. At which point the Colonel found himself a new younger mistress. During the mid-1800’s Maine was in the grips of witchcraft hysteria. Buck decided to use this to his own advantage.

In order to dispose of Ida he accused her of being a witch. Buck was believed because he was a leading citizen of the community. Ida was found guilty of witchcraft and sentenced to burn at the stake.

It is said as she burned she placed a curse upon the Colonel. She warned that she would haunt his grave. As the crowd and Colonel Buck watched she proclaimed that she would 'dance upon his grave' at his death.

When Jonathan Buck died in 1875 evidence of Ida Black's curse was noted. Shortly after the colonel's death a 'bloody leg print' appeared upon his large grave monument.

Many people over the years have tried to remove it but it always reappears. Descendants of Colonel Buck have even replaced the stone twice but the bloody print always returns. Reports state that the print always appears more pronounced on the anniversary of the Colonel's death.

23. The plantation owner's ghost

"There’s an old grist mill up in northeast Georgia that sits on property that the locals say was once a plantation. Story goes that the owner of the plantation treated his slaves poorly and even murdered one of them (whose ghost apparently can be seen on the property), so the slaves were said to have revolted and dragged the plantation owner up to the attic of the grist mill and lynched him. If you drive by at night and the conditions are right, and you turn off you headlights and drive slowly down the hill past the grist mill, if you’re lucky you’ll see a faint bluish glow and the outline of the plantation owner in the upper window of the mill. I’ve seen it; most of my friends have as well."

24. The Wendigo

"This story relates to the Wendigo. A bunch of friends and I were out one night to do some urban exploring, hiking through woods, etc. (What else is there to do when you live in bum-fuck nowhere?)

We were walking up a hill towards a connecting public park that was just kind of an open field with walking paths surrounded by dense woods. Standing on the edge of a tree line we looked out into the open field and saw what we all thought was a deer. Not that strange; deer are everywhere. We walk out into the field some more while watching the deer. As we get further out into the field, this 'deer' stands up on two legs and covers about 100 yards in what seemed like only a few strides. This freaked us the fuck out and we left as fast as we could.

I've been in the woods nearly all my life and I've never seen anything like that. Scary."

25. The Haunted House of Okinawa

"In Okinawa the was a house near the USO on Kadena Air Force Base that was abandoned. A man killed himself and his family in it. It was said to be haunted. It was even part of the ghost tours they gave on base. Reports that the outside lights would turn on by themselves and creepy things happening. One story was that a woman could be seen washing her hair in the sink in the kitchen through a window. The creepiest thing by far, was that this house shared a chain link fence with the daycare building. My friend's mom worked at the day care. Children, 4-5 y/o, would constantly throw toys over the fence. When asked why, they said they wanted to play with the children on the other side. All of the kids saw these other children, but the adults could not. It throughly freaked out anyone who worked there."

26. The little girl behind the tree

"There is a tree in my hometown and its trunk is shaped in a way that at night time there is a little girl peeking out from behind it and the freaky thing is it follows you until you drive beyond it."

27. Dead Children's Playground

"Back when I lived in Huntsville my home was ~100 yards away from the 'Dead Children’s Playground.' During the day it was just a place parents could drop their kids while they visited buried loved ones, but during the night it’s also a huge fog trap due to a giant rock wall around half of it. Supposedly swings move on their own and you can hear children laughing. We used to go out there at midnight all the time but apparently you have to go at “the witching hour” which I’m guessing is past my bedtime."

28. The Stüpp

"The Stüpp is a type of werewolf from German folklore. It usually waits around crossroads at dusk and after dark and leaps on unsuspecting passers. And that’s it. While other werewolves would promptly tear your face off, the Stüpp just stays clenched to the hosts back like a backpack, forever. As the person struggles to get the creature off, it grows in size meaning the more they struggle the greater it grows until the person either has their legs broken or shattered, or they die of exhaustion. Here’s the only Wikipedia page that I could find on it."

29. The Crawling Bags of Grain

"My mum told me this story about the village where she grew up in Scotland.

The village’s earliest known settlement is from 3000 BC, so it’s old. It’s been home to the Picts and the Romans. Nowadays there is a small woodland and the rest of the surrounding land is farmland. The woods used to be much larger, they are what survives of a large forest that almost completely surrounded the village. Legend says the forest was home to witches.

When the forest was being cleared for expanding farmland a lone witch came out of the forest to tell the villagers to stop. She said the trees would not forgive man for their destruction and if the villagers did not heed her words then all of their land would become infertile. And all the women.

Frightened, the villagers agreed but asked for a small part of the forest. A deal was made that this, and only this, land could be cleared. The witch also said that for every harvest of every crop grown there, one sack of produce must be taken to the edge of the forest and left.

This practice was followed for hundreds of years until the villagers abruptly tore down much of the remaining forest to grow wheat and build a mill. Again a strange woman came from the forest into the town and threatened the villages. She said they had broken the promise and would suffer. This time the villagers took the woman and hanged her. Her last words were that the price was now three sacks.

The man who built the mill was scared and after the first harvest he took three sacks into the woods. Unlike his neighbors his crops did not fail and his wife became pregnant. Always he paid the woods their due and before long he was the richest man in the village and had three beautiful, healthy daughters.

Unfortunately the man grew greedy and thought he’d no longer pay his three sacks. The next morning his youngest daughter went missing. The whole village came to help look for her, but the man asked that his men run the mill as normal so he didn’t lose any money. There was soon a commotion at the mill; some of the workers had fainted others were crying, some were shouting. The man came to see what was happening. A horrified worker told him they had started up the mill as normal, but blood had poured from between the stones. They had found his missing daughter.

Distraught the man sold his land and fled the village with his family. The mill was torn down and years later a silo was built there. By the 1960’s the silo was ancient and crumbling. It was also rumored to be haunted either by the farmer, his daughter or the witch. Sometimes all three.

This part is my mum’s story. One day she and her friends had a bet to see who could spend a night in the silo. One boy who was always boasting of his bravery volunteered. Between them my mum and her friends conspired to keep this a secret from their parents by lying about camping in each other's gardens. That evening the boy, John, climbed the silo loft and mum and her friend gave him a bag of food, a blanket, and a torch. They told him they’d be back in the morning but were actually planning on coming back later to frighten him.

They had waited a few hours and snuck back to the silo and alarmingly they could her John sobbing and crying for help. They found him quite a way from the silo pulling himself along on his stomach. John had jumped out the silo loft and broken his ankles. He was carried back to his parents' house and taken to hospital. After the inevitable week of punishment my mum was allowed to visit John. She said he still looked as terrified then as he had that night. She asked him what happened. He said he told his parents and the doctors that he fell but the truth was he saw something. Not long after he was left on his own he could hear something shuffling around in the loft. He used the torch to see but there was only empty grain bags. He tried to ignore the noise but finally it sounded like it was moving toward him. When he shone the torch on the grain bags again he saw that they were crawling, dragging themselves along the floor towards him. Thats why he jumped.

The silo’s long been demolished but they’ve built home there now. Week!" TC mark

This Is Why I Will Wait For You To Love Me

Posted: 04 May 2016 05:27 PM PDT

Ermin Celik
Ermin Celikovic

You totally have bad days where you feel lost and undecided. And that’s totally okay. You’re allowed to have those days because I feel lost sometimes, too. On these days, please know that I am here to wait until you get all right. I am your partner through the good and the bad. That’s what I’m here for.

When you’re ready, I hope you would talk to me and tell me what’s going on and where we stand. So believe me when I say I will wait for the reason that I can.

I will wait for you because I believe in you. I suppose I know you well enough for the years we’ve been friends. I believe when you told me that this break is just temporary. I believe when you told me that this is your own battle to fight. But believe me too, when I said that I will wait for you because I love you enough to give you my whole trust and respect your space.

Everyone tells me to just leave and brush it off. I know there’s a deeper reason. I just want to know it when you’re ready. I hope one of these days I would wake up to your call, telling me that you're finally okay and you're sorry for causing me pain. I wish you well, babe.

I have waited for 6 years for us to know that we have something special. For sure, I can wait a little more longer.

Perhaps, my love for you is so strong that nobody can shatter it. Not even your vague explanation could make me hate you. Even if you told me that this is yours to fight, I hope you know, that I'm with you on this. I will wait even if it takes time, even if it breaks me, even if it hurts.

I will wait for you. TC mark

Here Is What Energizes Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type

Posted: 04 May 2016 05:00 PM PDT

Jeremy Cai
Jeremy Cai

ENFPs and ENTPs are energized by exploring and synthesising new ideas.

ENFPs and ENTPs lead with extroverted intuition – a cognitive function that gains energy through brainstorming and exploring new ideas. When these types are low on energy, they recharge by speculating about new plans or projects they can take on, and new adventures or opportunities they could partake in. Nothing rears these types up quite like the emergence of an exciting new idea.

INFPs and ISFPs are energized by analyzing the deeper meaning behind events.

INFPs and ISFPs lead with introverted feeling – a cognitive function that gains energy through uncovering the deeper meaning behind the events of the user's life. When these types are low on energy, they recharge by meditating on their experiences and coming to conclusions about what those experiences mean in the greater scheme of things. Nothing leaves these types feeling refreshed quite like a long bout of emotional introspection.

INTPs and ISTPs are energized by piecing together logical systems.

INTPs and ISTPs lead with introverted thinking – a cognitive function that gains energy through constructing an overarching logical system as to how things logistically work. When these types are low on energy, they recharge by reflecting on how new information fits into their existing schema of understanding, and searching for consistencies or inconsistencies within that system. Nothing leaves this type feeling refreshed quite like clicking the puzzle pieces together of how a system functions, and perceiving shortcuts or potential manipulations that could exist within that system.

ENFJs and ESFJs are energized by interacting with the people around them.

ENFJs and ESFJs are extroverts in the typical sense of the word – their dominant cognitive function, extroverted feeling, gains energy through interacting with others and feeding off the energy of the people around them. When these types are feeling spent, they recharge by immersing themselves in the company of loved ones. Nothing leaves these types feeling refreshed quite like spending time in the presence of a positive, upbeat people.

ESTPs and ESFPs are energized by interacting with their immediate environments.

ESTPs and ESFPs lead with extroverted sensing – a cognitive function that gains energy through manipulating its external environment. When these types are low on energy, they recharge by getting out of their heads and interacting with the people and environment that surrounds them – be it through socializing, exploring a new location or participating in physical activities, almost nothing is off-limits for these adventurous, present-oriented types. Nothing leaves ESTPs and ESFPs feeling refreshed quite like exploring the world that surrounds them and sampling new sensory experiences.

ISFJs and ISTJs are energized by internally organizing their experiences.

ISFJs and ISTJs lead with introverted sensing – a cognitive function that gains energy by cataloguing the user's experiences in a practical and orderly fashion. When these types are feeling spent, they recharge by taking alone time to organize their thoughts, draw parallels between their past and present experiences, and consider how to best proceed in the future, based on what has worked best for them in the past. Nothing leaves these types feeling refreshed quite like taking the time to put their thoughts – and corresponding plans – in order.

ESTJs and ENTJs are energized by setting and achieving new goals.

ESTJs and ENTJs lead with extroverted thinking – a cognitive function that gains energy by identifying tangible solutions to problems that exist in its external environment, and then effectively carrying out the corresponding action plan. When these types are feeling drained, they recharge by injecting order into their lives, and aligning themselves with a new set of goals. ENTJs and ESTJs are problem-solvers through and through – nothing refreshes these types quite like laying out and executing a new action plan.

INFJs and INTJs are energized by analyzing plans for the future.

INFJs and INTJs lead with introverted intuition – a cognitive function that gains energy through examining all possible courses of future action, and pinpointing which one will ultimately be the most meaningful or beneficial. When these types are feeling drained, they recharge by taking time alone to analyze the situation at hand and consider it from various different perspectives. Then and only then do they feel confident acting upon their intuition about what's best. Nothing refreshes these types quite like pinpointing the best of all possible options. TC mark


Pick up a signed copy of Heidi’s new book “How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Personality Type” here.

39 Sexy Ways To Express How Horny You’re Feeling Right This Second

Posted: 04 May 2016 04:42 PM PDT








































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Some People Will Only Love You When You Stop Loving Them

Posted: 04 May 2016 04:41 PM PDT

Natalie Allen
Natalie Allen

Some people won't appreciate you until you're gone. When you no longer provide them with the support they took for granted, when you no longer send the sweet messages they ignored, when you no longer welcome them with open arms every time they knock on your door in the middle of the night and when you no longer wait by the phone for their call.

Some people won't realize how much you loved them until they find nobody else who can love them just as much. When they can't find someone who loves everything they're ashamed of, who looks at them like they're the only thing they've been wishing for or someone who makes them feel like they're home – safe and protected from all the chaos and noise of the world.

Some people will only try to get your attention once you stop giving them yours. When you stop being their biggest fan, when you stop liking all their posts, when you stop calling them in the middle of the day to say how much you love them, when you stop buying them things they mentioned they wanted in a random conversation and when you stop dropping everything to be there for them when they need you.

Some people will only try to win you back after they lose you. When they remember that you have options, when they remember that someone out there will treat you better, when they remember that you're not going to accept being an option forever, when they remember how selfish they were the whole time and how they never made you feel like you matter.

Some people will only miss you when you forget them. When you forget to call on their birthday, when you forget their favorite song, when you forget their secrets and when you throw away their memories. When you forget the way they made you feel.

Some people will only respect you when you walk away. When they realize that you compromised yourself for them, when they remember the number of times you went out of your way to please them, when they recognize that you've forgiven them time and time again, and when it hits them that you walked away because you've had enough – because they confused your patience and understanding with weakness, and confused your vulnerability with passivity.

Some people will only love you when you stop loving them. When you no longer miss the touch of their hand or the sound of their voice. When they can see that you've changed and you don’t look at them the same way you used to. When you no longer think about them before you sleep or drive by their house to make sure that they're okay. When they are finally ready to open their hearts to you after they broke yours into pieces. Some people will never get a chance to love you again because your heart will belong to the one who doesn't need to lose you to learn how to keep you.  TC mark

To The Girls Who Haven’t Found Love

Posted: 04 May 2016 04:36 PM PDT

Eutah Mizushima
Eutah Mizushima

It's any of us, it's you, and it's me. And we haven't found it for all the reasons in the world. Because guys just suck even more as they get older, because dating is hard as hell once you're out of school and in the real world, because who in the world knows how to be consistent and communicate in the day of age where our apps are changing every two weeks. It's not like we don't try. Don't get me wrong; I've done the apps. I've tried the OkCupid, the Tinder, the swiping left on the millions of guys that also have resorted to that option because I just don't know where else to look. And this is the part where you're gonna tell me, "Don't look, let him find you." Where? In the female populated profession that I decided to choose? While I'm working 10 hour shifts to go home and collapse in my bed? At this point, the only way he will find me is if he so happens to break into my apartment, and honestly, that's not how I hope to meet Prince Charming.

The worst part is that I know he's out there. He's somewhere in the grocery aisle, wishing he had a great recipe for mac and cheese, and waiting for me to enter in his life. But I'm tired of waiting for him. He needs to jump on an Uber and come to me because his two feet are simply not working fast enough. He's out there though. And I want to meet him.

Have you ever felt that you have all this love to give and no one to give it to? Yeah, family and friends are nice and of course, we love ourselves, but we want to surprise someone at work with lunch on a rough day, or hold their hand in a movie at a really scary part, or man, dare I say, fall asleep on someone's chest. It really is the simple things that we want, but we can't seem to find it from anyone, anywhere.

And we can't find it, we, well I'll say me, I start thinking the problem is me. It's not even that I'm looking. I go to work, go to my apartment, and go to see my family. If anything, I'm not giving myself an opportunity to look. But I've encountered men in my life who have caught my attention. They have made me wonder, "what if?" But they don't seem to reciprocate the feeling back. So then I'm wondering, am I just undateable? Am I just unlovable?  Am I grotesque? Am I destined to be a tea lady who has a lot of owls?(long story)

I don't know about you, but I refuse to believe that. I refuse to believe that love won't be mine one day. It's hard to fight that belief on some days, I'll be honest, but one thing I'm realizing is that you can't force love. Yeah you may want it, crave it, desire it, but if you force it, it still won't satisfy that hunger. It'll still leave you with that empty feeling in your stomach asking, "is this really it?" Who wants that?

I haven't found love yet, but I want it to be magical. I still believe in fairytales and happy endings. I want the love I find to be the heater to my cold nights, the ice cream on my happy days, the light in this world that seems to get darker and darker by the day. I want that love to come to show me that all the past frogs were frogs for a reason. They left me hungry, and I'll finally know why.

I haven't found love yet, but when I do. Man. Let's just say I can't wait to finally feel what it's like to be full. TC mark