Thought Catalog


26 One-Sentence Sex Stories That Show How Women Want To Be Touched

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 08:15 PM PDT

Twenty20, tailoredphoto
Twenty20, tailoredphoto

1. He reached a hand under my skirt and played with my clit while everyone else on the train went about their business, oblivious to the tiny moans that slipped from my lips as I threw my head back in orgasm.

2. I could feel his cock pulsing between my lips as the sweet taste of semen dripped down my throat.

3. I dug my nails into his skin until I could smell the faint scent of blood mingling in the air with our carnal sweat.

4. He threw me up against the wall, mouth skating over my neck, teeth biting into my lip, and fingers sliding into my pussy.

5. He tore off his tie and used it as a blindfold, so I was unable to see his hands slip off my underwear or his tongue inch toward my clit.

6. He stuck an ice cube in his mouth, let it dissolve against his tongue, and then used that tongue to make intensely chilling circles around my clit.

7. He hugged me from behind, one hand reaching under my shirt to fondle my tits and the other hand reaching under my skirt to play with my pussy.

8. The handcuffs closed against my wrist as his mouth closed around my nipple.

9. He fucked me up against the window, my ass pressed against the glass, and whispered about how he hoped the neighbors were watching every second of it.

10. I asked him how close he was to orgasming, but he was so entranced by my warm pussy and my bouncing tits that moaning was the only answer he could give me.

11. I straddled him as we kissed, and I could feel him getting harder through his jeans, wordlessly telling me I was hot as all hell.

12. He thrust into me as he rubbed the vibrator against my clit, intent on making me come before he had the chance to.

13. His thick hands massaged my back and his thin lips pressed against my neck, delivering a sweet sensation that not even an orgasm could match.

14. He led me into a bathroom stall, dropped to his knees, and stuck his head up my skirt to eat me out while people bustled all around us.

15. He had his head in between my legs, tongue running circles around my clit, and when I let out a long moan, I could feel him smile against my pussy.

16. As we spooned, I could feel his dick harden against my wiggling ass, and I knew it would only be a matter of time until we were both out of our clothes again.

17. He surprised me by showing up at my office, climbing beneath my desk, and making me come with his tongue before my boss had the chance to walk in and fire both of our asses.

18. He played with my hair as his dick slid back and forth against my clit, but as soon as he pushed it inside of me, he yanked my hair and took total control of me.

19. He bent me over the couch, my head against the cushions and my ass up in the air, so he could thrust into me and spank me at the same time.

20. His bright blue eyes flicked up to meet mine while his tongue ran up and down my clit, making sure I was enjoying the moment as much as he was.

21. He tied me to the bed, so I was unable to push his head away after he made me orgasm against his lips.

22He picked me up at 2AM, drove me around town while blasting our favorite tunes, and then pulled over to fuck me on the hood of his car while staring up at the stars.

23. He whispered lines from his favorite poem against my hair as he fucked me against our bookshelf, filled with novels we’d read on rainy days.

24. He woke me up with oral beneath the sheets and a tray of breakfast on the nightstand.

25. His hands dug into my hips, leaving bruises shaped like fingerprints, but that was nothing compared to the marks he left on my heart.

26. While he slid his cock in and out of me, he moaned about how much he loved me, and once it was all over and our naked bodies were cuddling beneath the sheets, he whispered the words again. TC mark

When You Fall In Love With A City

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 08:00 PM PDT

Anubhav Saxena
Anubhav Saxena

Falling in love with a place is so much different and more complex than falling in love with a human being.

Everything about the city excites you at first, as you explore it and learn the hot spots, the side to avoid, the best places to eat and socialize. You question everything about the city just as you would question a new beau on a first date, learning every nook and cranny of its existence and being.

A city cannot speak, so you must learn it more slowly and methodically. The beauty of this is in the unending truths. Your own eyes get to reveal and revel in all of the secrets, good and bad, of your newest adoration. In a city in which you don't speak the native language, another added difficulty only adds to the romance of the relationship as you learn words by association and context.

You will memorize the streets, the store fronts, the barista at your favorite coffee shop. The turns you missed a dozen times you'll take without a second thought while retelling a story and laughing with new friends. You'll become a tour guide when family and friends come to visit and meet your new city, and you'll proudly show it off.

There will be the bad times you. Something will happen to make you question your love, whether it be heartbreak, a bad night out, or a failed excursion. At some point, as with everything, your city will disappoint you. But in that moment, real love will prevail when all else will falter.

The puppy love will fade and you'll be left with all or nothing. If it's nothing, the disappointment may drive you to looking for a new landing spot, a new place to start over. But if it's all, then you'll come to appreciate and love this new home even more.

It will become a home even if it is thousands of miles away from your roots.

In that moment, you will feel so settled and comfortable, that no matter how long removed you are from this place, you will always be able to return. Distance makes the heart long for lost loves and grow fonder, and returning will be the sweetest part. TC mark

27 Modern Acts Of Chivalry That Separate The Jackasses From The Gentleman

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 07:15 PM PDT

Twenty20, hmmessersmith
Twenty20, hmmessersmith

1. After you two hang out, he texts you to make sure that you got home safely.

2. He records the shows that he knows you can’t stand, so he can watch them after you leave and won’t miss out on any time with you.

3. If his phone beeps while you’re out on a date, he won’t even bother to check it, because he’s entirely focused on you.

4. He clears out a section of the closet for you to keep your clothes in, so you don’t have to keep carrying your entire wardrobe back and forth.

5. He turns the heat on in the car whenever you shiver, even if he’s already boiling hot.

6. He doesn’t argue when you ask him to wear a condom.

7. He changes his relationship status on Facebook to “in a relationship” before you awkwardly ask him to do so.

8. Instead of vaguely asking you to hang out, he specifically asks you on dates, so there isn’t any confusion.

9. He asks you out on those dates in person, so he can get an answer face-to-face instead of over a cell phone.

10. He deletes his Tinder account the second that he realizes you’re the only one he wants to be with.

11. He sends you good morning texts every single day, so you always have something nice to wake up to.

12. He lets you use his Neflix account, so you don’t have to pay for a separate one.

13. He lets you choose the music off of his iPod when you’re riding in the car together.

14. He goes down on you just as often as you go down on him (maybe even more so).

15. He gives you the passcode to his phone, so there aren’t any secrets between you.

16. He holds your pocketbook for you whenever you run to the bathroom.

17. He lets you use his charger whenever you ask, even if his phone’s battery is dying quicker than yours is.

18. He offers to pay for your meals, but doesn’t keep on insisting after you make it clear that you’d be more comfortable splitting the bill.

19. When you two run into a girl he knows, he explains exactly who she is and how they met, so you don’t have to spend the entire day wondering if they used to date.

20. He lets you hog the blankets and steal his pillows, as long as it means you’ll get a good night’s rest.

21. He keeps tampons in his cabinet and a garbage can in his bathroom, because he knows it’ll make period week easier on you.

22. He makes you breakfast after you spend the night instead of giving you cab money and sending you on your way home.

23. When you aren’t in the mood to have sex, he happily cuddles you instead of pestering you to change your mind.

24.  He “likes” all of your selfies, especially if no one else has yet, because he never wants you to question your beauty.

25. He lets you borrow his shirts and boxers when you complain about your dress being uncomfortable.

26. He offers to share his food with you, even if you keep claiming that you aren’t hungry.

27. He holds open doors for you and offers you his jacket when you’re cold, because some acts of chivalry never go out of style. TC mark

10 Things I Wish I Knew About Eating In Italy Before I Went

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 07:00 PM PDT

Thomas Schweighofer
Thomas Schweighofer

1. There is no such thing as free water.  If you want water at a restaurant you're going to have to pay up. Restaurants usually charge about 1.5 euros for a bottle of water, price depends on the size of the bottle and the location of the restaurant. The tap water in Italy is drinkable, and many restaurants will allow you to bring water from outside.

2. Restaurants charge you to sit down. Restaurants will charge you a "sitting fee" of about 2 euros to sit at one of their tables or counters. This is why many servers, especially in tourist areas, will try and aggressively sell you on why you should eat there.

3. Expect to pay for the "free" bread or chips at the table. Nothing is free at restaurants in Italy. Repeat. NOTHING is free. In America, we are used to indulging complimentary bread or breadsticks before our meal. But in Italy, they might bring it out without asking you, and expect to see it on your bill.

4. There will be smoking at outdoor restaurants. Having a relaxing glass of wine or cigarette during lunch or dinner is completely normal, so expect to be sitting next to tables of smokers. Many of the tables will already come with an ashtray, and several of the restaurants have cigarette vending machines.

5. Don't eat Chinese food! As a spoiled SoCal gal, I had a major craving for some good ole' dumplings, fried rice, and rice porridge. Yet what I got was the saltiest, strange food vaguely resembling "Chinese" food. Yup, never again.

6. Don't expect servers to be super smiley or accommodating. Since servers aren't living off tips they're much less likely to bend over backwards for you while maintaining a smile like they do in America.

7. Expect your coffee strong. Coffee in Italy is an important affair, and nothing like the cold sweet drinks we're used to at Starbucks. When I asked for an ice coffee at a café, they gave me an utterly confused look, and ended up giving me a coffee that was shaken over ice. Frappuccinos and iced Latte's are just not a thing here; with most Italians drinking a straight shot of espresso every morning or as a desert after their meal.

8. Five course meals are a must have at some restaurants. A few restaurants we tried to frequent would not let us dine if we didn't order at least three courses. The Italian dinner is a big deal and often comes complete with an antipasto/primo/secondo/contorno/and dolce. The antipasto is something to nibble on before the meal, often olives, nuts, or a glass of wine. The antipasto is the first course, usually a pasta, risotto, rice, polento, or charcuterie platter. The secondo is the second course, usually a chicken, fish, or meat dish. The contorno is a platter of vegetables that accompany the second course, and lastly, the dolce is the dessert!

9. McDonalds is neither quick nor cheap. When we stopped at a McDonalds in a more rural area, our order took almost 20 minutes to come out even though there was no one else there. There is definitely a more laid back culture, and they felt no need to rush our order. Plus, the McDonalds was pricier, with fish filets costing 4 euros and no soda fountain, only bottled juices and canned soda.

10. Breakfast is simple. We usually ate a really simple breakfast at a café or the hotel. There is no such thing as pancakes and waffles here, instead a piece of toast with tomato puree and a few slices of prosciutto will do the trick. TC mark

Here’s Exactly How To Motivate Your Partner, Based On Their Zodiac Sign

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 06:00 PM PDT

michela ravasio
michela ravasio

Aries

(March 21st to April 19th)

“Don't ever forget just how strong you are — in your mind, in your emotions and physically. You have the ability to move mountains with your heart, and your words, because you operate on such a level of extreme passion. Don't ever lose touch of that. You are capable of so much, and you will always come out on top if you just remind yourself of that every single day.”

Taurus

(April 20th to May 21st)

“Some people might call you stubborn, but you simply just know what you believe in, and that is rare these days. You are headstrong, and you have faith in your mind and your emotions. Don't let anyone tell you how to think or feel. You're extremely intelligent, you are strong, and when you trust yourself you are unstoppable. Keep pushing yourself to make all of those beautiful dreams a reality.”

Gemini

(May 22nd to June 21st)

“You are filled with fire — do not let anyone put that out inside of you. You have the capacity to make everyone around you laugh, you are interesting, and you have an incredible energy to you. You are the epitome of fascinating.”

Cancer

(June 22nd to July 22nd)

“The way you feel your emotions is incredible. You are in touch with every facet of your heart and its sensitivity. Your ability to believe in others, and to trust that we all hold good within us, is beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you that your vulnerability is a bad thing. Don't let your heart harden. Don't let the world jade you. Keep feeling, keep having faith in others. The right people know that you are a rare gem in this world.”

Leo

(July 23rd to August 22nd)

“You hold within you this charisma that stops people in their tracks. You are charming, interesting, and captivate everyone around you. When you speak, people listen. When you walk into a room, everyone stares. You capture people. You will always get what you want, so don't forget that this also applies to your dreams. Ask for what you need, and take it when it comes to you. Push doors open. Nothing can tie you down.”

Virgo

(August 23rd to September 22nd)

“In a world that keeps trying to cut corners, in a world that is quickening and moving at warp speed, you still stick up for detail, for perfection, and that is an amazing trait. You see things no one else sees, you are reliable, your words of advice motivate and inspire people, and you help everyone around you understand themselves a little more because you help to slow everything down. People admire you and appreciate your presence in their lives.”

Libra

(September 23rd to October 22nd)

“Your personality is just stunning. Your ideas hold so much merit and thought that they can truly change the world if you simply put them to good use. Don't let people push you around. Don't allow for people who may not understand you to make you feel unworthy of success, love and happiness. You are worth so much. Your heart is worth so much. Have pride in how unique you are. Take all of what you hold within you, and run with it — spread it around, and you will see just how much you inspire.”

Scorpio

(October 23rd to November 22nd)

“You need to understand that good people exist in this world, you included. Please, trust that not everyone is out to break your heart and hurt you. Not everyone has a hidden agenda. Your passion makes you feel the most incredible things, and when you push people away you deny them of the ability to experience just how deep and beautiful you are inside. People need to experience that, because you hold within you a love that changes lives. Your loyalty, your depth — it is otherworldly. Being on the positive side of that will truly open up the world for you.”

Sagittarius

(November 23rd to December 21st)

“Please understand that you do not have to destroy yourself in order to feel better. You are so fun to be around, you hold adventure within you unlike any other. People want to be around you, you have a way of captivating them. Don't get addicted to that, though. You have the ability to be alone, you are strong enough to stand on your own. You are strong enough to go on your own adventures, to make your life your own. Go out and live for yourself.”

Capricorn

(December 22nd to January 20th)

“You don't always have to be the person who is solely focused on money, and success. You have to understand that those things do not define you. You are worth so much more. You can be yourself. You can live without worrying about your next step, and the step after that. You can relax, you don't have to push people away, they are not going to ruin your progress or hurt you. Open yourself up to love, and simplicity. You need the balance, and you flourish when it graces your life.”

Aquarius

(January 21st to February 18th)

“No one will ever be able to understand you. This may make you feel alone, confused, misunderstood, but please — know that it is your greatest asset. You are on a level that no one can reach, and you have the ability to lead and dream and make incredible things happen because you are truly a genius. People are captivated by you, they want to know you, even if they can't comprehend your mind, they will always be fascinated by it. They will always appreciate it. Keep going, you will do much more standing out than fitting in.”

Pisces

(February 19th to March 20th)

“You are the most beautiful soul — the perfect balance of sensitivity and mind. You will always get what you want if you simply just focus and trust that you are worthy of success. Keep focusing on the positive, don't let the world hang heavy on your shoulders, you are allowed to put your load down. You are incredible, and you truly need to see that. You are worthy of so much — repeat that, and keep on repeating that until you truly believe it.” TC mark

55 People Reveal The Strangest Thing About Their Body

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 05:15 PM PDT

Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Found on AskReddit.

1. I cry when I pee or take a shit.

"I cry when I pee or take a shit. It’s not just tearing up, it’s literally tears streaming down my face. I have no pain, nor is it because I feel relieved. Nobody that I know experiences the same thing. (Sorry if I made any grammar mistakes. English is not my first language.)"


2. My nuts are comically tiny.

"I'm Asian yet have a bodybuilder’s physique, including legs. I’m 5’8″ but my penis is huge (9.5 inches and thick) but my nuts are regular size. So my penis looks normal sized compared to my legs/body and my nuts look comically tiny."


3. I have three nipples.

"I have a third nipple."


4. I have four nipples.

"Two extra nipples."


5. I was born without eyebrows.

"When I was born, I didn’t have any eyebrows. Dislike, they were fair, or light, I had none. They didn’t begin developing in until I was 6 years of age. After ten years, they are sketchy, at various statures, and look in no way like each other. No idea why."


6. I have a birthmark on the tip of my penis shaped like the continent of Africa.

"I got a birthmark on the tip of my penis that’s weirdly shaped like the continent of Africa. Ladies find it cute, which is why I’ll never get circumcised."


7. I have a micropenis.

"I have a micropenis. I’ve pretty much given up on dating. The only way I could ever be in a relationship is if a woman doesn’t care that much about sex."


8. I look like I’m going to murder someone when I comb my hair.

"If I touch the right side of my scalp, my lower eyelid twitches. I look like I’m going to murder someone when I comb my hair."


9. I am shaped like a shovel.

"I am shaped like a shovel. Seriously. Like, you know 'pear figures'? Yeah, I don’t have that. I am straight and then, BOOM! My hips billow out like the giant disappointments they are."


10. I do not recognize or remember faces.

"Brains are part of the body, right? I have Prosopagnosia (face blindness), which means that I do not recognize or remember faces. I can look at someone, turn around, turn back, and I won’t recognize their face. I don’t recognize my coworkers, friends, or family by face. I have a lot of funny stories related to this…"


11. If I touch my clit on the toilet, I automatically pee.

"If I touch my clit on the toilet, I automatically pee. Like a pee button. It’s kinda useful for public restrooms where I want to be in and out really fast."


12. I have tits and a dick.

"Tits and a dick. Most people seem to find that rather weird."


13. It’s like a whole community of hair just said 'fuck it' and moved to my body’s equivalent of Florida.

"On the left side of my head, above my ear, I’ve developed a random bald spot slightly larger than the diameter of a quarter. Coincidentally, right below my right shoulder, I have a thick patch of back hair about the same size (my back is otherwise hairless). It’s like a whole community of hair just said 'fuck it' and moved to my body’s equivalent of Florida."


14. Certain sexual thoughts will cause me to sneeze involuntarily.

"When I have certain sexual thoughts, I get an involuntary sneeze reaction. It’s not all sexual thoughts, just the ones I find inappropriate. Like, I when I first started fooling around with my girlfriend (now my wife) at her mom’s house where we could get caught by her slightly younger sister, it happened a lot. But fooling around in general wouldn’t cause the sneeze unless I was about to suggest something a little naughtier than normal.
My wife knows now, so when we’re in bed and I sneeze her first reaction is to ask if it’s an innocent sneeze or something else. It’s only gotten me in trouble once or twice, like when her girlfriend casually mentioned threesomes and I sneezed immediately, which kind of pissed off my wife because she knew it wasn’t an innocent one. Her friends and sister, thankfully, don’t know about my sneeze reaction."


15. My mom says the mole on the side of my head looks like a penis.

"I have a perfectly smooth, mushroom-shaped, skin0colored mole on the side of my head and I’ve had it since birth. My mom says it looks like a penis, you know, nice stuff that moms say."


16. I have two pee-holes, and pee comes out of both.

"I have two pee-holes…they’re right next to each other and pee comes out of both."


17. I'm a guy and I have a huge butt and huge thighs.

"My thighs are really disproportionate compared to the rest of my body and my butt is bigger. I am a guy and this really doesn’t look good."


18. My penis curves upward and toward the left.

"My penis curves upwards but is also turned about 15° to the left. It’s weird. I can pee around corners."


19. I get pus-filled cysts over much of my body.

"I have a condition called hidradenitis supprativa. I get pus-filled cysts in my armpits, under my breasts, on my stomach, and along my inner thighs. It is pretty rare, and can be debilitating (I have a mild form, so if you Google it, be warned you’re gonna see some nasty shit). Had it since high school, and it sometimes will go into remission. It is now thought to be an auto-immune disorder of the apocrine system, but not much is known about it. I try to watch what I wear, because certain clothes will rub my skin and cause a cyst to form. If I get a cyst, I usually pop it myself and clean it up. Sometimes it can open a small sinus in my skin, which is gross. I have a lot of scars from it, and some cysts that I’ve popped and drained will sometimes refill. I’ve run across something that says menopause can make it go into remission, so I have that to look forward to. The human body is weird."


20. I have an amazing retractive penis.

"Retractive penis. 1in or less flaccid, big 7.5in hog erect. Kinda convenient actually, takes up less space, less likely to get hit, not swingin' around wildly, but this tactical advantage is cancelled out by my huge grandpa balls."


21. I can roll my stomach like an Indian belly dancer but I’m a white male.

"I can roll my stomach like an Indian belly dancer but I’m a white male. I have no idea when or how I discovered i could do it but I was very young since I remember doing it for show and tell in kindergarten.
Edit: Also, my second toe is longer than my first on both feet by a full segment. It makes it difficult to get comfortable shoes sometimes because they’re designed for the big toe to be the longest."


22. I get earth-shattering orgasms when jizz is inside me.

"I'm a woman and the thing that gives me the best earth-shattering orgasms is when my partner cums inside of me. Not the act of cumming (though I enjoy that too) but the actual jizz makes me orgasm for up to an hour after sex. Never found out of any other women experience this, none of my girlfriends do."


23. I can snap my toe like I'm snapping a finger.

"I can snap my toe. Like, finger-snapping…with a toe."


24. I can lick my elbow.

"I can lick my elbow. This is supposedly 'physically impossible,' and yet…here I am :P"


25. I have a sexually sensitive 'spot' between my clit and G-spot.

"Most women have lots of sensitivity in the clit and G-spot. I have a third 'spot' sort of between the two, located right at the top inside of my vaginal opening. Stimulation of that particular spot gives me the BEST orgasms, and when I’m turned on it even feels a little stiffer than the surrounding areas when I touch it with my fingertip."


26. "My hands turn blue when it’s cold.

"My hands turn blue when it’s cold. When it’s very cold they also have orange dots."


27. My penis moves around on its own.

"My penis moves around on its own. I get out the shower, towel off and sometimes I sit around butt ass naked and play Call of Duty. I’ll look at my dick and it’ll going from one side to the other or going in and out like a turtle. I heard that has something to do with it trying to get cool, but once it finds a cool spot, shouldn’t it stop moving?"


28. I have a T-shaped tooth.

"I have a T-shaped tooth."


29. I have these chicken-stick calves.

"Well, I’m 6’6″, and have a great shoulder to hip ratio, but I have these chicken-stick calves. They refuse to grow. So I like wearing pants to try and cover them up, because it looks really weird if I’m wearing shorts. Also, I sweat really quickly in my underarms, but nowhere else on my body. It could be like jacket and scarf weather, and after like 5 minutes outside I start pitting. It’s so annoying."


30. I'm male but my body is shaped like a girl's.

"I'm male but my body is kinda shaped like a girl's, in terms of ass, hips, thighs and waist. Someone reposted a picture of my ass/body to gonewild, tagged falsely as a girl, and it got like 50,000 views and universal positive comments, no one knew.

My life sucks.

Here, copying the damn ass pic up a level. NSFW."


31. My face is allergic to sunlight.

"I'm allergic to sunlight. But it’s local only to my face. I mean, it’s nice that it doesn’t cover all of my body and all, but it’s literally the worst place that I could think of. When I have a reaction I can’t speak for around 1 week, and after that it takes another week until I am at the point where I can utter more than simple words when necessary, as it is very uncomfortable to talk, still can’t say “m”, “p” or “b” though, that takes another week. One time I ended up being unable to eat for around 5 days (more than 120 hours), lost 5kg in that period.''"


32. I have hair on the penis up until close to the tip.

"I have hair on the penis up until close to the tip, and i have to pluck it out every week. :("


33. My belly is like an unpredictable balloon.

"My belly. It’s like an unpredictable balloon.

It will be perfectly flat one day and the next day I’ll look like a 9-month-pregnant man. Doctors are baffled and said its weird but assured me it’s nothing to be concerned about.

It really happens if I drink beer, the next morning my belly is huge and no amount of shitting/farting will make it go away, it just gradually goes away throughout the day or sometimes it’ll stay like that for a few days."


34. I always sneeze twice. No more, no less.

"I always sneeze twice. No more, no less. Two shall be the number thou shalt sneeze, and the number of the counting shall be two. Four shalt thou not sneeze, neither sneeze thou once, excepting that thou then proceed to twice. Five is right out. Once the number two, being the second number, be reached, then wipest thy nose on thy friend’s interior, who being naughty in my sight, does not say, 'bless you.'"


35. I'm allergic to caffeine.

"This is more internal, but I’m allergic to caffeine, meaning, give me a large cup of caffeinated coffee and I’ll end up blacking out and doing something/insulting someone and I don’t remember it. It started out with just shaking and irritation, but turned into a full fledged symptom of being wasted."


36. I can roll my eyes into the back of my head.

"I can roll my eyes into the back of my head. Decided it would be funny to do this during sex, and to say boyfriend’s name in a creepy voice. He didn’t think it was very funny."


37. I’ve had my ascending, descending and thoracic aortic section replaced with synthetic material. That shit’ll be sitting there in my coffin long after I’m dust.

"Probably my aorta. I have Marfan’s syndrome, a genetic disorder that affects the connective tissue. Morphologically speaking people like me tend to be very tall, very thin, pigeon-chested, long-fingered and -toed. Because it affects the muscles we tend to have poor eyesight and we’re not real good at bulking up. We’re usually creepily flexible and our spines are scoliosis city.

The most dangerous symptom, however, is a weakening in the aortic wall which can result in aneurysm (an enlarged bubble sort of) or dissection (a catastrophic tear that’s %40 fatal).

I had an aortic dissection 3 years ago. Since then I’ve had my ascending, descending and thoracic aortic section replaced with synthetic material. That shit’ll be sitting there in my coffin long after I’m dust. That’s pretty weird, I guess."


38. I have a freakishly long wing span.

"You know how your wing span is supposed to roughly match your height? Well I’m 6’3″ and my arms are 6’9″. Lots of rolled up sleeves in my world.


39. I am lopsided toward the left.

"My entire left side sits about 1/4 an inch lower than my right side. My ear is lower, my shoulder, my hip is lower, but you wouldn’t notice unless you looked at how I wear my clothing and that everything on my left side is almost always crooked."


40. I have almost no hair except for the five-inch nipple hair.

"I am almost bald, have no armpit hair and very little genital hair. But boy, I do have one 12cm long nipple hair."


41. I always had dry crusty earwax the consistency and texture of cornflakes.

"So when I was a kid I always had dry crusty earwax the consistency and texture of cornflakes. It would build up in my ear canal un til one day it would break off in one huge piece. My doctor said it probably wasn’t a big deal and not to worry about it, and every time I birthed an ear baby my friends would gather around and marvel. No biggie.

Fast-forward to puberty and no one has told me I need to wear deodorant. In fact I never smell. Well my feet do, but I can’t figure out if people are being nice cause I can literally NEVER smell BO on me. I now wear deodorant but mostly because it smells nice and I do sweat a lot. But all my sweat smells kinda pleasant actually.

So two years ago I’m YouTube surfing and find a video about Japanese cultural differences and one thing they mention is how hard it is to find deodorant. Apparently there are two different sweat glands, one that creates a feeding frenzy for bacteria and one that doesn’t. The Japanese just don’t have any of the former genetically. I’m sitting wondering if I have that gene as well when the woman says there is a very easy way to check if you have this gene: crusty earwax.

Mic drop."


42. My left collarbone is about an inch higher than my right one.

"My left collarbone is about an inch higher than my right one. It’s not super noticeable unless you’re looking for it, but it’s enough to make me a little lopsided and prone to shoulder pain. Also, I can burp on command."


43. I have an exceptionally stretchy Weenus.

"I have an exceptionally stretchy Weenus."


44. I'm a girl and I have a little patch of blonde hair on my throat.

"Ever since I was really little I’ve grown a little patch of blonde hair on my throat. I’m a girl so it would be where a guy has his Adam's Apple. My mom has taken me to the doctor a couple times to ask what it is and the doctors insist it’s just a form of a birth mark. I shave it now because if I don’t you can see the blonde patch of hair. Weird thing is my hair is naturally dark, and even when I shave it it still grows back blonde. And it can get kind of long too, and one time in elementary I was on the school bus and the sunlight had just hit it right and the girl next to me made fun of me and told everyone :( nobody knows about it now except for all of my new weird reddit friends! (And the mean girl from 4th grade)"


45. I have three testicles.

"I have 3 testicles. At least I hope the 3rd one is a testicle…! It feels the same as the others."


46. I have a long 'unicorn hair' that grows out of the center of my forehead.

"Occasionally I have a single, long, wispy hair that grows out of the center of my forehead. It seems to appear overnight, and can be like an inch long. We call it the unicorn hair. It’s almost invisible, but once my wife saw it, she looks for it all the time."


47. The world will sometimes seem much louder to me for about five minutes, like every noise is pissed off at me.

"I've had this thing, ever since I was a kid, where randomly the entire world would seem louder and more intense. Usually for about five minutes.

It used to happen monthly when I was a child, but it only happens once or twice a year now. So far I’ve never met anyone else who knew what I was talking about.

It’s like sound and movement becomes aggressive. Like every noise is pissed off at me. It’s kinda scary but also damn fascinating.

I assume it means I have psychic powers or my brain is a nest of tumors. Maybe both."


48. I'm really stretchy.

"I have hypermobile joints, which basically just means that I’m really stretchy. It affects my hands and arms more than anything else. Because of it, my neurologist thinks I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a rare connective tissue disorder."


49. My tongue is probably like six inches long if I pull it out all the way.

"I am the opposite of tongue-tied. I have no little connector-thingie so my tongue is fucked. It’s probably like 6 inches long if I pull it out all the way. I’m like Gene fucking Simmons over here and have learned how to do some weird shit with it. When I was younger the big joke was that i’d end up being a lesbian and I haaaaaated it. But I did. Look who’s laughin’ now."


50. My mom did drugs and alcohol while pregnant with me, leaving me with several birth defects.

"When I was developing my mom did an unknown cocktail of drugs and alcohol. My ears attempted to form twice then the canals merged together. As a result, I can hear sounds outside normal range on the high and low end but have a very hard time with hearing human speech. I have to be in the room lip reading to really fully grasp it. The little nub in your ear (where you would get a tragus piercing) I actually have two nubs one above the other where the outside of my ear started to form a second time but didn’t.

All my ligaments are either too long or too flexible causing my joints to just slip out sometimes. As a result I’ve sprained one ankle 5 times in one month, dislocated both hips (bucked off a horse), my knee (stepped in a hole while walking), my thumb (grabbing something), and my personal favorite dislocated my shoulder buckling my seat belt. Thankfully I’m pretty good at popping them back in without assistance.

Also due to drugs my gut fauna is a bit fucked. I cannot eat spicy foods, not just like Mexican spices but even like too much onion powder gets me. I end up throwing up immediately after eating it. I have to manage on a fairly bland diet as a result.

Moral of this story, don’t do drugs or drink when pregnant. You can fuck yourself up all you want but when it involves a developing life seriously just don’t do it."


51. God was drunk AF when he made me.

"I have one ball, one kidney, and an ecto-spleen (basically two spleens). God was drunk AF."


52. I'm immune to mosquito bites and poison ivy.

"I'm immune to mosquito bites and poison ivy. My friends hate me."


53. My belly button looks like a cinnamon roll.

"My belly button looks like a cinnamon roll."


54. I can ensure an entire Q-tip into my left nostril, straight to the back.

"My nostril is funny. I can Insert a Q-tip into my left nostril. It just goes straight in, straight to the back. Completely, without being visible. It doesn’t hurt. And my nose works fine otherwise. And no, I never did coke or the like."


55. My body is fucking weird.

"I'm a 5’7″ woman, wear a size 6/8 in top and bottom (my wedding dress was a size 8 and they’re usually sure sized), and am technically morbidly obese by body fat standards (~40%) . I am the definition of skinny fat.
Turns out I have a rare genetic condition that decreases the amount of free testosterone I have to virtually 0, meaning I have a really hard time building and retaining muscle mass. I started taking hormone therapy a few months ago after searching for a doctor that would give a woman testosterone (but not for gender identity reasons). I actually lift regularly and even with such low muscle mass, I can bodyweight squat (~180 lbs) and am pretty close to the 500 club. My body is fucking weird." TC mark

29 ‘INFJ Problems’ That Make This Rare Personality Type Truly Special

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 05:00 PM PDT

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TC mark

You’re Not Really A Couple Until You’ve Sent / Received These 50 Hilariously Loving Texts

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 04:30 PM PDT

Thought Catalog Instagram
Thought Catalog Instagram

1. Can't wait to see you!

2. Running 5 behind…

3. You’ll be there on time, right?

4. WTF where are you?

5. ???

6. !!!

7. Seriously. How late are u going to be?

8. Last night was sooooooo amazing;).

8. Let's do something DIFFERENT this weekend.

9. Missing you SO MUCH today!

10. Don’t forget to pick up a bottle of red on your way home.

11. Please tell me you're in the mood for Chinese food…

12. Did I mention that I love you?

13. A LOT.

14. You're sexy af.

15. Can we stay in tonight? Just us…

16. Don't forget to call your mom!

17. What's up with that Tweet you just sent?

18. Did you just ignore my call?

19. Who are you on the phone with? Why aren't you answering??!!!

20. If you don't unfollow all your exes right now, I won't fuck you later.

21. Whatever…so over it.

22. Tonight: You. Me. GOT.

23. Happy humpday, lover. #killmenow

24. Thanks for being you:)

25. You'll never guess what just happened….

26. I’m so glad we’re not like them.

27. Listen: You do you and I'll do me, k?

28. My head hurts.

29. UGHHHHHH

30. FML

31. Wanna run away and be bartenders in the Caribbean like in Cocktail?

32. Really?????

33. I didn’t mean it like THAT.

34. C’mon….

35. Aren’t we past the silent treatment thing?

36. What are you REALLY trying to say?

37. Shit, you're an asshole sometimes.

38. Eat me.

39. Whatevs.

40. You fucking suck.

41. I hate you.

42. Don't come home tonight.

43. It's over.

44. Don't bother reaching out.

45. I'm turning my phone off now….

46. Goodbye. For good.

47. hello?

48. I didn't mean it i'm sorry i take it all back please don't hate me.

49. I was an asshole i love u can we make up now?

50. Let's never fight again, k? TC mark

Shame On You For Playing With My Heart

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 04:00 PM PDT

Mayla Wind
Mayla Wind

I found calm amongst the vast ocean in your eyes. I wrapped myself up and got lost in the comfort of your existence to fend off the feeling of an empty heart. You quickly became my favorite fix, a drug of the toxic variety. You did to me what none others had done before, fed a part of my creative soul that was starving for so long. You ignited a feeling both euphoric and intoxicating. I was hooked. I fell far down the rabbit hole and forgot which way was up, feeding off the creative energy you supplied. I didn't want it to stop and as the effects faded, like most do, I was left in a frenzy.

But it was all an illusion. None of it was real. None of it meant a thing to you, because to you it was just a game.

Every stroke of your hand on my face broke a little piece of both of us. You told me it was over with her, that she was just a piece of your past clinging helplessly and hopelessly to your present. And I believed you. Shame on me, right? Shame on me for being the girl who believed the boy who brought sunlight to my cloudy day. Shame on me for believing when you told me that your life was confusing right now, but you wanted more with me. A “season two” if you will.

Shame on me for allowing my heart into something that seemed promising. For falling into routine mornings of music and coffee. For opening myself up to something that seemed new, exciting, inspiring.

But more than anything, shame on you. Shame on you for playing on the heartstrings of two women who wanted nothing more than your attention and honesty. Shame on you for trying to mend things with her while you took me to bed. Shame on you.

I didn’t understand the situation from the beginning but I was drawn to your magnetism. But it was all a facade.

You don’t know what you want, and you claim it’s due to this dire need to make everyone else happy. To make sure everyone else is okay and content. But it’s not that at all, because in the middle of the night when she sleeps next to you and you’re texting me…you’re only thinking of yourself.

It’s men like you that make it so hard for women to trust.

You know, the kind of man that wants to have his cake and eat it too. You damaged two perfectly beautiful souls because while you toyed with my emotions, you were dwindling her self confidence down to nothing. Painting this picture of a beautiful future for the two of you while your head lay snug on my chest. You got lost in your own false sense of reality where this was something normal, that you were doing no wrong. It’s situations like such that make the hearts of many women cold like stone, unable to allow the right ones in because we are too busy rebuilding from the wrong ones.

You were wrong, sometimes in all the right ways. The way you touched my mind and nurtured my body made me feel like I was the only one in the world you could ever touch that way. You blurred the lines of right and wrong so beautifully. Doing things and saying things that made me really feel that this was something, but it wasn’t. It was all lies.

You broke her heart, and you may have had me fooled, but you won’t break mine.

Maybe this was all a blessing in disguise. A screaming wake up call to actually follow my gut, cut ties, and move on. I do believe it’s time to stop falling into failed romances and start caring for the heart beating in my chest surrounded by a ribcage called home.

I am all I need right now.

I don’t need the nonsense brought about by a man who finds joy in breaking hearts. I will take care of myself, do what makes me happy, find what I love, and hold onto it. I will fill my heart, make it whole, and know that my relationship with myself is the most important. I come first. TC mark

Here’s The Type of Love You Truly Deserve

Posted: 26 Jul 2016 03:15 PM PDT

 Emily & Steve Photography
Emily & Steve Photography

You deserve the kind of love that is deeper than the ocean. A deep love is something that can't be defined by wealth or fame, it can't be measured by time or distance, and it can't be compared to anything that's pleasing in the eyes, but is relatively immeasurable and mysterious. The only measurement that can atone to it is "deep" — too deep, you can't even see the bottom, and too deep that it seems infinite. And love should be eternal, it should be endless, and it should imply commitment. One who is deeply in love wakes up every morning to give meaning to every experience, and does not seek for comparison or judgement.

You deserve a love that motivates you. One that whispers "keep going" when it gets too hard to make a step further, one that will open your eyes to every beautiful thing that roams the Earth. A type of love that will let you appreciate even the most difficult experiences; and will make you realize that every sad scene accounts for a happy ending. It is out there, and you need to remember that the love you deserve will make you appreciate life, a love that will motivate you to "keep living a meaningful life, no matter what" when circumstances become too tough.

You deserve a love that comes timely, for love is not found. It comes accordingly, when you are ready for it. You need to understand that you are a living proof of "love" and so, you don't need to seek any further. Love will come to you when you're committed enough to cherish it, to sustain it, to spread it and to keep it.

You deserve a love that finds a home in you . . . for love is the most comforting emotion that humans are capable of. It is a seed that grows to bear fruits of kindness, courage, compassion and hope. It is a tree that roots from trust, loyalty, and understanding. Every heart is a home, and that home becomes empty when love is missing. You deserve a love that does not make you feel homeless, and you deserve a love that somehow makes you feel responsible to nourish it. You need to become a welcoming home, to invite that love to come to you. A Home is a resting place, and so you deserve a love that will forever rest in you, for you and with you.

You deserve a love that sets you free — free from all the bad memories of the past, free from the ugly pictures you imagined about love, and free from the meaningless definition of love such as pain and mistrust. You deserve a love that allows you to leave when you no longer feel like you can stay, but most importantly, you deserve a love that will never give you the feeling of needing to be "FREE".

You deserve a love that can conquer all, even the hardest temptations and the most unbearable discouragement. A love that can withstand the strongest and raging storms, you deserve the type of love that will keep you safe.

Yes, there is a kind of love that is too beautiful to imagine . . . you just have to believe and see for yourself. For starters, take a deep breath and evaluate yourself – ensure that you are capable enough to handle that type of love, and that you are also willing to offer more than what you are bound to receive.  Remember, love is felt and is manifested through actions. TC mark