Thought Catalog


50 Sweet Things To Say To Your Boyfriend (That Every Man Secretly Craves Hearing)

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 08:15 PM PDT

Milly Cope
Milly Cope

1. “I’m lucky to have you as a partner.”

2. “I miss you when we’re apart.”

3. “You make me so happy.”

4. “I love you.”

5. “I can’t wait to grow old with you.”

6. “I’m so attracted to you.”

7. “I’m happy to see you.”

8. “You make me feel supported and safe.”

9. “I love the way you love me.”

10. “When I think about you, I smile to myself.”

11. “You’re so handsome.”

12. “Your smile gives me butterflies.”

13. “I love it when you put your arms around me.”

14. “You always make my bad days better.”

15. “You make my heart happy.”

16. “You’re the only one who can make me feel this good.”

17. “I’m so glad I met you.”

18. “I can’t wait to see you later.”

19. “You do such a good job of taking care of me.”

20. “You always know how to turn me on.”

21. “I love seeing you smile.”

22. “I love hearing you laugh.”

23. “You look good today.”

24. “I love touching you.”

25. “You make me feel so lucky.”

26. “I’m grateful to have you.”

27. “I love how hard you work.”

28. “Life with you is so much better than I thought it could be.”

29. “I love doing things that make you happy.”

30. “I love falling asleep with you next to me.”

31. “I think my friends are jealous I got such a great guy.”

32. “Remembering that I get to come home to you makes bad work days manageable.”

33. “You are my favorite person.”

34. “You’re the guy I’ve always been looking for.”

35. “You make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world.”

36. “I never thought I could be this happy with someone.”

37. “I love how you always have my back.”

38. “I appreciate you.”

39. “You make me feel so loved.”

40. “My life is so blessed because I have such a great partner.”

41. “You always smell so good to me.”

42. “I love hanging out just the two of us.”

43. “No one else can make me belly laugh like you.”

44. “You could make any girl happy, I’m so lucky you chose me.”

45. “I love it when you cook for me.”

46. “I’ll love you forever.”

47. “I love the protected feeling I have when I’m with you.”

48. “I never knew someone could make me so happy.”

49. “Thanks for being you.”

50. “I can’t help but brag about you sometimes.” TC mark

Read This When It’s 3 AM And You Feel Alone

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 08:00 PM PDT

Thought Catalog Tumblr
Thought Catalog Tumblr

Read this when the day turns to night as the moon replaces the sun, as the light turns to dark and the voices telling you you're not good enough come out to play.

It's something about the darkness that makes you feel so alone. There is no longer the company of the sun shining on your skin to make you feel alive or the familiar voices of friends surrounding you.

At night there is only silence and the dark silence always breaks you, as much as you try to stop it.

You feel alone and you feel like you're drowning in your own thoughts and sadness. You look at the clock, you stare at the phone watching each minute pass hoping you'll fall asleep soon so you can wake up again when the sun is up.

There's something about being alone at 3 AM that makes you feel like the whole world is against you. You think about every life choice you've made and how you could have done so much better. You think about all the regretful choices you made, if only you knew then what you know now how things would be so much different.

You feel so used to the pain, almost as it's no longer sadness you feel in the darks of the night, but instead you feel numb. You feel nothing. The tears that you cry aren't sobs anymore, they're silent; they just stream down your face without a sigh, almost as it is a routine.

The emptiness you feel makes you exhausted, but you still can't sleep. You feel nothing at the same time you feel everything and your mind just constantly wanders. You think of everything while feeling nothing, it a strange twist of emotions you can’t really explain.

It's the time of night you convince yourself that no one likes you. You tell yourself no one would notice if you just packed up and left.

Your brain tells you that you'll never find real love because you're not worthy of it. You think about how much you hate yourself, you completely destroy everything you've been working on about self-love because the voices are so powerful at 3 AM when you're trapped alone with your thoughts in the silence of the night.

You wish you had someone to talk to, you wish you had someone by your side, you wish anyone was by your side because then maybe you wouldn't feel so alone. But there is no one there.

The negative thoughts continue to flood your brain and it kills you inside. You start thinking you did something to deserve this pain, you start worsening the self-inflicted pain because that's really all it is. It's you turning the knife in yourself a little deeper.

It's hurting yourself a little more because maybe you find comfort in the pain, maybe you find comfort in the sadness you feel in the night.

But remember this, you're not alone when it's 3 AM and you're feeling alone. You’re not the only one who is feeling this way. You're not the only one who has experienced this hallow sadness you just can't escape. You're really not alone, no matter how much you feel it at 3 AM.

When the sun comes up and the familiar voices return you won't feel so alone.

You're so much stronger than you give yourself credit for, you're so much wiser than you think you are and you are brave. You may feel alone and lost, but you're not. The world needs you, the people in your life need you and I promise you they would notice if you disappeared.

Everyone creates their own future and you are so much more than the voices in your head at 3 AM.

Don't give up, don't let the thoughts from the night cloud your mind during the day because things will get better, I almost guarantee it. TC mark

43 Women Confess The Sexual Questions They’re Dying To Ask Men (But Are Afraid To)

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 07:15 PM PDT

thoughtcatalog.com / Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz
thoughtcatalog.com / Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz
Found on AskReddit.

1. Do guys taste their own cum?

"Do guys taste their own cum? If so, did you like it?"


2. Do guys ever compare their dick sizes with each other?

"Do you ever compare/talk about your dick sizes with your friends ? Not like 'Hey let me whip it out and show you,' but in the way girls talk openly about their tits?"


3. Why don't you just sit down to pee?

"I would like to know, why don’t you just sit down to pee? It’s tidier. Is there some judgment guys face for not sitting down to pee?"


4. Why don't you make noise during sex?

"Why are guys so non-expressive during sex?"


5. Why are you so hung up on your dick size?

"Why are so many men ridiculously insecure about the size of their penis?"


6. How does it feel getting an accidental boner?

How does it feel getting an accidental boner? Do people notice? Do girls/guys get the wrong idea?


7. How deep up your ass is your G-spot?

"How far do I have to stick my finger up your guy's asshole before I hit the G-spot?"


8. What do you think about your girl calling you Daddy?

"Guys, what do you think about your girl calling you Daddy? During sex and outside of sex."


9. Do guys watch gay porn?

"A lot of girls watch lesbian porn, do guys watch gay porn?"


10. Do penises float?

"This one is from my friend and I didn’t want to google it for her: Do penises float? Like, if you’re taking a bath, does your penis float up, stay down, go somewhere in between?"


11. Why do you scratch your balls and then sniff your hands?

"The ballsack scratch ‘n’ sniff: what are you inspecting for? Do you just like examining changes in the musty odor, or does the change in odor signify something special I’m not aware of?"


12. Do you guys swing your penis around like an elephant trunk when you’re naked?

"Do you guys swing your penis around like an elephant trunk when you’re naked? If I had a penis this is exactly what I would do."


13. Kissing your partner after a BJ—yay or nay?

"Kissing your partner after a BJ—yay or nay?
Also, I’ve seen a lot of guys say that women are ‘intimidating.’ I’ve actually heard this from my ex—I’m 5’8″ and 140 pounds, and shy as fuck; how do I intimidate anyone? I mean, I know a lot of guys are afraid of rejection, but the worst a girl can do is say ‘no,’ and it’s not the end of the world. What gives, and how can I make myself less intimidating?


14. Have any of you hated cunnilingus but learned to love it?

"I’m curious, are there any men here to hated cunnilingus and learned to love it? Any tips to make that happen?

Background: I have an amazing boyfriend whom I love very much—he’s pretty fucking awesome except one tiny thing: He’s only ever gone down on me once, the first time we hooked up. I give him a great (if I do say so myself) BJ at least once, sometimes twice and on some occasions even three times a week. He fucking LOVES them, and yeah duh, because oral is awesome.

I’ve never had issues with this before—exes have worshipped my vagina in the past. I’m super clean, shaven, open and experimental… etc.
He’s a bit… sensitive to criticism and I don’t want to make him feel like I’ve been unfulfilled this whole time, and it’s honestly my fault for not mentioning it thus far (1 year). But… halp! What should I do? What if he really does just hate doing it?

He’s the type of person that just won’t do things if he doesn’t want to. I feel like there’s a reason he hasn’t done it. I know that when we look at porn together he’s not super into the up-close vagina shots, maybe he just really doesn’t like looking at them? I dunno. Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated. (:

tl;dr – How to get a guy to want to go down on you if you suspect he’s not into doing it."


15. Why do you always choose gingers?

"Why do you always choose gingers?"


16. What’s the fascination with cumming on faces?

"What’s the fascination with cumming on faces? And do you really still find the face pretty after you’ve done it?"


17. How do you feel about a girl being the first to say 'I love you?'

"How do you feel about a girl being the first to say 'I love you?' How soon is too soon for this to happen in a relationship? How much will it fuck up what you’ve got going if the girl says it and you’re not there yet?"


18. Is a foreskin high-maintenance?

"I have a question about foreskin. Ok, so on a daily basis, what do you have to do to keep it clean? Is there a lot of maintenance required? When you pee do you have to pull the skin back or do you just pee freely without moving it?"


19. What does it feel like to stick your dick in someone?

"I've always wanted to know what it feels like to stick your dick in someone."


20. Is there a 'technique' you use for downtown landscaping?

"Is there a 'technique' you use for downtown landscaping? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a guy with red bumps or missed spots."


21. When guys pee at a urinal, do you pull just the shaft out, or the balls, too?

"When guys pee at a urinal, do you pull just the shaft out, or the balls, too?"


22. Is there a difference in how vaginas feel?

"Is there a difference in how vaginas feel?"


23. Do we look stupid when we suck in our cheeks while blowing you?

"Does that 'cheeks sucked in' blowjob look when we look up at you actually look good? I think I look stupid doing it."


24. Do you fantasize about your female friends?

"A friend of mine confessed about it when he was drunk. But is it really that common for guys to think about naughty stuff about their female friends?"


25. Do you guys care about stretch marks?

"Do you guys care about stretch marks? I have A LOT of stretch marks at my butt and my legs from a growth spurt when I was a teenager and it bothers me. I’m afraid to have sex because I automatically assume guys are turned off by stretch marks and find it disgusting.

Also, make up or no make up? I look so much better with make up but I can’t bother to be honest. Although I’m afraid some men will not find me as attractive without makeup as with make up…"


26. Are you disappointed if a girl cums super fast?

"Is it disappointing if a girl cums super fast (like maybe she’s just the kind of girl who gets off at the drop of a hat) or do you give yourself a pat on the back (for being so good that she came that fast)?"


27. Why do most guys love doggy style sooooo much?

"Why do most guys love doggy style sooooo much?"


28. Do you get big and little orgasms like we do?

"Do you guys get big O’s and little O’s like we do?"


29. Do you notice all our flaws like we do?

"Do you notice all our flaws like we do? Like if we’re fucking do you think ‘oh, gross, look at that cellulite’ or ‘that stretch mark is disgusting’ or ‘hmmm, she appears to missed a patch shaving on her legs’. Do you notice when we’ve gained a few pounds whilst we’re riding you? Honestly?"


30. Would you feel emasculated if a girl proposed to you?

"Would you feel emasculated if a girl proposed to you?"


31. Is it true that there are two little hidey-holes that your testicles can get sucked up into?

"Is it true that there are two little hidey-holes that your testicles can get sucked up into? If so, does it feel weird? Does the scrotum just hang empty like a sad flag? I heard about this once and I’m fascinated by it."


32. How do you sit down without squashing your junk?

"How do you sit down without accidentally crushing your twig and berries?"


33. What do guys expect after sending a dick pic?

"What do guys expect after sending a dick pic? Would a girl sending a close up of just her pussy be actually arousing?"


34. What the deal with balls?

"What the deal with balls? Should we play with them during a hand job/oral? What’s a good move? I’ve never been able to say, 'Hey, you want me to, uh, touch your nuts?' during sexy times. Feels weird, man."


35. Do you really jerk off daily?

"Do you really masturbate (almost) daily?"


36. What do you think about after sex?

"What do you think about after sex?"


37. Do you ever think other dudes are hot?

"How often do you guys acknowledge the attractiveness of other guys? Not necessarily tell them but do you guys ever think of ‘this dude is hot’ or something like that in passing?"


38. How mortified would you be if you get shit dick?

"Why do you like anal so much? I POOP out of there! I’m a fan of anal it’s just surprising because poop. How mortified would you be if you get shit dick? That’s my biggest fear with it. Not tryna shit on my man."


39. Does it make you feel insecure when we jerk off during sex?

"Does it freak you out or make you feel insecure when girls use their hands to help things along on our part? I often am 'hands on' myself so that I can climax inside and out at the same time, but it took a while to get comfortable enough go full bean flip. "


40. Do you pee a little every time you poop?

"Do guys really pee a little every time they poop..? As in, does the act of pooping physically make guys wee a bit?"


41. How do I straight-up ask a guy why he hasn’t gone down on me yet without making it awkward?

"How do I straight-up ask a guy why he hasn’t gone down on me yet without making it awkward? Is it me or is it just cause he doesn’t like going down on girls? I don’t think it’s me, BC my last boyfriend LOVED going down on me. So I’m just trying to find a way to bring it up without making him uncomfortable or the situation uncomfortable."


42. Are circumcised penises easier to keep clean?

"Are circumcised penises easier to keep clean? I’ve learned about smegma and how if you don’t thoroughly clean under the foreskin you will have a seriously gross peen, but is that also a thing for circumcised guys?"


43. When you cum, does it feel like pissing in the same way doing anal kind of feels like shitting?

"When you cum, does it feel like pissing in the same way doing anal kind of feels like shitting? Since guys’ cum comes out of the urethra I’ve always wondered this." TC mark

I’m Going To Love You Forever, No Matter What

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 07:00 PM PDT

iStockPhoto.com / svetikd
iStockPhoto.com / svetikd

You are quite literally, engrained in me.

We met on a sidewalk, and instantaneously it was like magic. We just got each other. We were rapid fire conversation, no awkward moments, hand-in-hand automatic friendship. We were, "Your mom seems so cool," and "I bet this dress would look great on you." within 20 minutes.

We just made sense.

And honestly?

We STILL make sense.

You are one of the few people who I have ever met who just gets me. Who rolls with me whether I'm feeling more 'go out to the bar' or 'go to bed at 10:20.' Who hears about me fucking my old roommate and just says, "Was it fun?" instead of freaking out. Who reminds me to never trust a Ryan or a Derrick but to always trust my gut.

You are someone who feels less like a best friend, and more like a fingerprint. You're just a part of me.

And here's the thing.

I know things are kind of weird right now.

I know you are figuring things out and deciding what you want to do and who you want to be and finding what feels right for you. I know you're looking at that five-year plan and trying to not be intimidated but also are maybe not totally in love with it. I know you're in the middle of the California heat and it's really beating down and you don't want to be swallowed by the impeding fire but you're also trying to not run.

I know you're going through it.

And what I'm saying is: I get it.

And what I also get? I get that we're different.

I get that when faced with a crossroads or a big moment or even just a life decision, you and I will almost always react differently. You are more feeling, I am more thinking. You are more art, I am more spreadsheet. You are more sleep it off, I am more stubborn.

And that's fine.

Because I think, I really think, that's what makes us work.

I think what makes us work is that while we are so automatically understood, we are so different. If we'd attempted to be twins, one of us would have tried to absorb the other. We were not meant to be mirror images, instead strangely opposite but very alike counter parts.

But I want you to know, no matter what you do or where you go:

I'm going to be here.

Maybe it'll be next to you, trying to decipher Spanish or French or Italian and looking for gluten-free options in whatever country we've settled. Maybe it'll be in some random Airbnb, laughing about shower pressure and neighbors and their dogs and taking ridiculous photos of ourselves on the attached balcony. Maybe it'll be over computer screens, through text and abbreviations and lols and Slack and whatever.

But whatever the maybe, it's going to be here.

Because love, this is me being sappy, but here it is.

We only get a few forevers in this life, but you are absolutely one of mine.

So know that no matter what, I'm here.

No matter the co-pilot, the decision, the choice, the zip code, the social media, the wording, the opinion, the hair color, the walking distance, the time in between texts, the boys, the girls, the jokes, the stories, the difference between now or whenever.

I'm fucking here.

You are quite literally, engrained in me.

And that, my love, my sun my stars my goddamn moon (lol) means we're in it to win it.

No matter what. TC mark

To The One Who Was Never Mine

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 06:00 PM PDT

 Scott Webb
Scott Webb

Hello Lover,
Soft glances over broken bottles
you’re getting ready to leave
with the morning air
and I can’t stop you
and I can’t watch you.
and I can’t hold you
back.
because you can’t hold back
what isn’t yours.
and you certainly were never mine.
sometimes I wonder
if I myself,
was ever mine.

But lover,
that misty morning
in December last year,
or decade,
when our lips brushed
and our bones gasped in wonder,
under the warmth of two hearts of stone,
that moment,
when the universe collapsed
and reformed
in the blink of your eyelids,
that moment,
is mine.
Like the countless others,
when the globe stopped revolving,
to admire
two cold beings
on fire.

All those moments,
that history books have forgotten about
all of them,
are mine.

My mother had taught me
in 2nd grade
that you can’t hold on
to anything at all.
Because holding on is sad
it takes away
the ability to live,
and dream
and allow happiness
to enter.

Maybe that is why,
I’ve learnt to let go
more than to hold tight,
and sometimes,
when the wind asks me,
about the lovers I lost
and the loves I didn’t hold close,
I laugh, but do not respond.
I can’t tell the wind
or the howling voices
of the universe,
that I’ve made museums
of human beings
inside me,
colonies of the ways,
they’ve formed me
live in between my skin cells
and every time
a new person decides to leave
I make a home for them
in the vacant galaxies
of my lungs
So that every breath I ever take
from here on,
smells a lot like,
them,
the loves that could’ve been
but never were.  TC mark

Maybe It Was Silly To Fall For You

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 05:00 PM PDT

Ashley Webb
Ashley Webb

Maybe it was silly to want it. To want your attention, however short and sporadic, despite the warning words of my friends. To want that rush, a rush I’ve never experienced before. The kind that left me intoxicated until I would sober up, and then crave that sweet intoxication all over again.

To want to be wanted. To want you.

You knew it, I knew it, but it felt too good.

Maybe it was silly to need it. To need it to become more, when these small bouts of your time and heart-eyed emojis just weren’t enough anymore. To need to know I could possibly be more than just another number in your phone, another girl to add to your lengthy list.

But that’s all I would be, could be. Without it ever being said.

You knew it, I knew it, but it felt too good.

Maybe it was silly to return to it. To return to the same old patterns and your familiarity. The exquisite highs followed by inevitable let-downs. To return to the same old behaviors that caused the end the first time around. A lot can change in a year. But it was apparent from this return that change was not possible for you and me.

You knew it, I knew it, but once again, it felt too good.

It wasn’t silly to end it. To end my annoyance and anger at your inconsistency and carelessness. To end your words and flattery that would only show up at your convenience. To end your certainty that no matter when you beckoned, I would come. To end it and consider you to be one of my most important, valuable lessons. To end it, and absolutely mean it.

You know it, I know it, and it feels really good. TC mark

50 Pillow Talk Questions For Late Nights And Early Mornings With Your Love

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 04:00 PM PDT

Bianca des Jardins
Bianca des Jardins

1. If I died, what would you put on my tombstone?

2. If we were on a TV show, do you think the viewers would ship us?

3. Before you met me, did you think you’d be alone forever?

4. Would you rather spend eternity in hell with me or in heaven without me?

5. When did you realize you were in love with me?

6. If every person you killed made you live another ten years, how many people would you kill?

7. How would you describe me to someone who’s never met me?

8. If we bought a dog, what would you want to name it?

9. Have you ever dreamt about me?

10. Would you have a superhero themed wedding?

11. Are you excited for work tomorrow?

12. What’s the weirdest song that makes you think of me?

13. If I landed a job in another country, would you move there with me?

14. What would you do if I dropped dead right now?

15. What type of wedding dress do you think I’d look best in?

16. If you had to choose between dying and breaking up with me, which would you choose?

17. Do you consider yourself successful?

18. How often do you masturbate to me?

19. Do you think you’re getting more attractive as you age?

20. What do my lips taste like?

21. Were you nervous during our very first date?

22. How many pets would you consider too many?

23. What was your favorite movie when you were a little kid?

24. In your opinion, what was the best sex we’ve ever had?

25. What crappy movie do you secretly love?

26. If you had unlimited funds to take me on a romantic getaway, where would we go?

27. What’s your favorite photograph of us?

28. If I killed someone, would you call the cops on me?

29. Where do you picture us living in ten years?

30. Is there anyone, besides me, that you’d go to jail for?

31. How many hours (or days) does it take for you to really miss me?

32. What’s the longest amount of time you’ve spent on line to see a movie?

33. Would you rather work for a living or stay home with our future children?

34. If I suggested something super kinky that you were freaked out by, would you give it a try anyway?

35. If we won the lottery, what’s the first thing you’d do with the money?

36. What type of alcohol should I stock the fridge with?

37. What movie have you seen lately that you think I’d love?

38. What was the first thought you had when we met?

39. If you could magically learn a new skill, what would it be?

40. Who’s your favorite couple on television?

41. What do your friends really think of me?

42. What do you remember about our first kiss?

43. What was the best day of your life so far?

44. In your opinion, how long does the perfect round of sex last?

45. What’s the best birthday gift I could ever get you?

46. Where do you want to go on our date next weekend?

47. Do you think our children would be adorable?

48. What’s your favorite cuddling position?

49. What’s the worst nightmare you’ve ever had?

50. How was your day, baby? TC mark

I’m Christian, My Husband Is Muslim — This Is How It Works.

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 03:15 PM PDT

iStockPhoto.com / CoffeeAndMilk
iStockPhoto.com / CoffeeAndMilk

First and foremost, I wrote this post for myself. I must remind you that I am no teacher. I am simply a human with a soul, sharing my perspectives and experiences with you. We will all be accountable for our actions one day.

It’s 2:19 in the morning and my husband begins his fast for Ramadan in half an hour.

He went to bed about 10 minutes before me but he always waits up for me, which I love.

I usually go to bed so late as my mind comes alive at night and I find it easier to write then.

I thought I would be done writing for tonight but I guess I'm not.

I want to have sex with my husband right now, but I can’t. As I said he is about to begin his fast in 28 minutes, which doesn’t leave us with enough time annoyingly.

Sex amongst other things is something that one has to abstain from when fasting.

Which is why I am now on my phone writing this, whilst he has just fallen asleep in my arms.

And no, I am not fasting because you see, the thing is, I am a Christian and he is a Muslim.

Yep. You read that correctly but just in case you didn't – I am a Christian and he is a Muslim.

Why did I marry a Muslim man?

It is not a question I thought I would be asking myself; let alone answering, only 9 months into my marriage.

But here I am — doing just that.

Unfortunately my answer isn't as straightforward as, "I couldn't find a good Christian man so I married a Muslim man." If only that was the case. In fact I wish my husband were Christian. Because truth be told, all I ever wanted was a husband who loved God like I did, maybe even more.

I pictured us going to church together, praying together, and singing gospel songs together (even though I can't sing).

But I let that picture fade away over the years.

Writing about this decision is something I have been itching to write about for years.

But I have never been itching to share it.

I have often kept quiet on this topic because I don't feel the need to have to explain my choices in life.

So rather than explain this choice, I will try to tell my story.

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.

The reason I am telling it now, is because someone recently asked me if I was planning to convert for my husband and it kind of caught me off guard.

Not because this was the first, or the second time I have heard such a question, but because it shocks me every time when people genuinely feel they have the fucking right to ask such a question, especially people who are don't even believe in God!

In hindsight, I know people don’t mean any harm, but the next time someone asks me this question post this article I’m going to politely tell them to fuck off.

But for now – let me take you right back to the start.

And for me it starts with the search of God.

The search for God is a reversal of the normal, mundane wordly order.

I have grown up as a Christian my entire life but I didn't start searching for him until I was 19 after my I broke up with my ex-boyfriend and my self worth was shattered.

In the search for God, you revert from what attracts you and swim towards that which is difficult.

You abandon your comforting and familiar habits with the hope (the mere hope) that something greater will be offered you in return for what you've given you.

On this search, I found that I knew not only that there was God, but that I was a child of God.

When I understood that, when I comprehended that, more than that, when I internalised that, ingested that, I became courageous.

Very courageous.

People who knew me prior and still know me now could probably attest this.

I stopped living to please people.

I really did.

I started to become honest with my feelings and myself.

And in the vain of honesty — the true reason why I had wanted to marry a Christian guy was because it just sounded right.

It sounded perfect.

It looked 'right'.

People would look at us and think we have all our shit together. And that feeling of admiration from others – I wanted that. I needed that.

I wanted to be the status quo but the truth is, that when you follow God, there is no such thing as being the status quo.

God now have a divine place in MY life.

When my husband came into my life, he not only knew this but he understood this and wanted to help me on this journey.

As I have said countless times in previous blog posts I didn't look for this love. I really didn't. I didn't even think I wanted this love let alone let alone deserved this love.

But God knew I n-e-e-d-e-d this love.

I legitimately do not believe that he would have wanted me to turn it away.

Love is very strong, stronger than we can even fathom.

Love isn't something you have to look for; it will find you. You don't have to run to what you think love is because when it's genuinely meant for you it will catch you, and never turn you lose.

This is what happened to me.

It still humbles me that this force that makes leaves and fleas and stars and rivers and you, loves me. Me, Linda. It’s amazing.

I am really blessed to have what I have and who I have in my life. I have worked hard to get here. When I say "here" I mean arriving in and to my happiness.

The day I walked down the aisle to greet my husband, I saw God, I swear I did. And I knew I couldn't turn back.

I didn't want to turn back. I wanted to run as fast as I could to the front to be with my maker.

It is actually quite remarkable that the picture I once had in my head at the start still manifested in some shape.

Having a love like ours is difficult. I am not going to lie to you. And I know it will be even more difficult when we have children.

But I couldn't imagine doing life with anyone other than him and God.

One day, far from now, when the sands of time threaten to fall no more. I will read my words and I will remember why I married a Muslim man.

(As the late Muhammad Ali has said, "We all have the same God, we just serve him differently. Rivers, lakes, ponds, streams, oceans all have different names, but theu all contain water. So do relgions have different names, and they all contain truth, expressed in different ways forms and times. It doesn't matter whether you're a Muslim, a Christian, or a Jew. When you believe in God, you should believe that all people are part of one family. If you love God, you can't love only some of his children"). TC mark

What It Feels Like When You’ve Finally Moved On

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 03:00 PM PDT

 Danielle Drislane
Danielle Drislane

It's a weird feeling when you realize that you have finally gotten over someone and have moved on. It's really surreal. You couldn't believe that it's actually happening and that you doubt yourself a second because maybe this is just a phase and after a few days you'll realize that you're still in love with him.

But no. You're not. Not anymore.

This time, it's for real.

He doesn't give you butterflies in your stomach anymore. He doesn't make you feel like your chest is about to explode anytime because of so much joy and love you have for him. You don't smile through your eyes just because you're looking at him.

You don't wait for his messages anymore.

You don't wonder about where he may be or who is he with anymore. You don't have these contradicting thoughts in your head whether you should send him a message first or not because you don't want to be so desperate and obvious that you're still in love with him.

You don't intentionally go to that place where you used to hang out, anymore. You'd rather go home directly after work and watch television or call your friends and have dinner with them, instead. You don't have this heavy feeling in your chest that you have to carry around like it's not dragging you down.

You don't have to pretend to be happy anymore because being happy comes naturally now. You have lesser sleepless nights because he's not on your mind that much anymore.

He makes a cameo on your mind from time to time but it doesn't bring back all the pain that you have felt before. It doesn't make you want to cry or want to listen to sad songs all day long.  He's just simply up there in your mind.

And you don't think that the sad songs that you hear are written for you, anymore.

When you see him, you still feel something. That's normal. But when you see him, you don't want him back anymore. You don't wish in your head that he would talk to you first or that he wouldn't leave too early. You don't try to flirt with him to make him realize what he's missing. You don't try to make him jealous by talking to your other guy friends a little bit flirtatiously.

You know he's there but you don't mind so much anymore. You focus on yourself now and what you're doing with your life. You have finally established a routine that doesn't involve him. You can finally smile unpretentiously and your chest feels lighter than ever.

You finally have moved on.

You've tried and have done enough to fight for him. But victory is less likely when you're the only one who fights.

You may never have thought that this day would come. But it is here now.  And it was worth the wait.  TC mark

14 Guys On The Painfully Honest Reason They Fell Out Of Love

Posted: 08 Aug 2016 02:00 PM PDT

@ThoughtCatalog
@ThoughtCatalog

1. “We both began to wonder what else was out there. We were each other’s first serious relationship, only relationship basically, and I think the fact that either of us wanted to know what else was out there, made us wonder how real our love was to begin with.” —Zack, 26

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2. “We were only staying together because we were with each other for so long. Once we could accept the fact that maybe the past 7 years wouldn’t amount to what we thought it would, we could accept that we were no longer in love.” —Colin, 29

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3. “We both didn’t have that connection we had when we first started dating, and I think we tried too hard to try and revive it. You can’t force a connection that’s already been lost.” —Ryan, 27

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4. “I think it was just the realization that she wasn’t the right person for me. I wasn’t the right person for her.” —James, 26

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5. “We moved to a new city together, I changed, she stayed the same. We should change together, change shouldn’t be one-sided when it comes to love.” —Omar, 27

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6. “Our sex life died, and the love went with it. Sex is so important to a relationship. When we stopped having it, everything was gone.” —Austin, 28

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7. “She cared far too much about her career and not enough about our relationship. I understand that a relationship doesn’t have to be your entire life, but balance is key, and she couldn’t balance me with her job.” —Luis, 27

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8. “I fucked up and cheated, she said she could forgive me, and she did give me a second chance, but just because she stayed with me doesn’t mean she ever fully trusted me again. Her lack of trust is what made me fall out of love with her.” —Ty, 26

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9. “We both went to different colleges and grew apart. High school love is overrated. You don’t know what the hell love is when you’re 17.” —Bobby, 25

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10. “Our relationship just got boring. It wasn’t her I got bored of, it was everything else. We stopped trying new things together, we stopped challenging each other, which led us to want new experiences without each other, new experiences with new people.” —Corey, 28

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11. "Distance is the killer of all love, don't believe anyone who tells you differently. I had to move 300 miles away from my girlfriend. We thought we could do it, but we clearly couldn't. Skype just doesn’t cut it, especially when it comes to sex. I don't know who it was harder for, me or her." —Brandon, 27

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12. “She lost a job she loved, and when she found another one, she was blatantly unhappy. I couldn’t be her only source of happiness, it wasn’t enough.” —Geo, 28

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13. “We had to move in with her parents for 5 months while we attempted to find a new place to live together, and within those 5 months, shit hit the fan. We were miserable, and the fact that we couldn’t overcome this obstacle together, which in my opinion wasn’t that big of an obstacle, showed us that we shouldn’t be together.” —Marc, 26

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14. “My job involves a lot of traveling. We lived in 12 different states together, and the entire time it was just her going wherever my job would take me. She stayed with me through all of the moves, which I was extremely grateful for, but it got to the point where I wanted to know what it was that she wanted for herself, rather than just following me and my job, and she didn’t know. I think that’s when I fell out of love with her, when I became her entire world, and she didn’t have one of her own.” —Jay, 29 TC mark