Thought Catalog

14 Foreplay Tips For Desert Dry Girls Who Have Trouble Getting Wet

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 08:00 PM PDT

Emmanuel Rosario
Emmanuel Rosario

1. When you’re relaxing on the couch with him, think sexy thoughts. Let your mind wander away from the television and fantasize about what you wish he was doing to you. When you’re sufficiently wet, initiate sex.

2. Or, if you want to get him in on the action, grab his hand and place it on your pussy. While you’re watching TV, he can absentmindedly rub until you’re ready to go.

3. Ask your partner to go down on you and bring you to the brink of orgasm. Some women are extra sensitive after they cum, so fucking him right after he eats you out isn’t the best idea–unless he stops before you orgasm and then penetrates you.

4. Start the foreplay hours before you see him by sexting. If you share dirty photos and thoughts throughout the day, you’ll be horny AF by the time you actually see him.

5. Ask him for a massage. It’ll be a turn-on to feel his hands across your skin, but it will also help you relax. The biggest reason why women experience pain during sex is because they’re too tense. You need to relax.

6. Masturbate in front of him. You know what you like, which means you should be able to get yourself wet in no time. And watching you will get him hard, so it’s a win-win.

7. If you’re uncomfortable touching yourself in front of him, then you can excuse yourself, run to the bathroom, and masturbate in there. Don’t make yourself cum. Just make yourself wet.

8. On your drive over to his house, listen to empowering music that puts you in the mood. You can even touch yourself a little when you’re stopped at lights.

9. Use lube so things are extra slippery. Just remember that the lube isn’t meant to replace your natural wetness. It’s meant to add to it. So if you aren’t wet in the first place, you’ll still experience discomfort.

10. You’re allowed to touch yourself, you know. During foreplay, rub your clit or play with your nipples if that’s what turns you on. Do whatever you need to do.

11. Cuddling doesn’t have to happen after sex. You could cuddle as foreplay. After all, there’s nothing better than feeling his hard-on rub against your butt.

12. Make-out for as long as you’d like. Some men don’t appreciate the lead up to sex, but to hell with him. If you need a high school style make-out session in order to get wet enough for sex, then keep kissing him until you can’t take it anymore.

13. Foreplay by playing strip poker or a sexy board game. Just don’t play any drinking games. All that alcohol might make you feel more frisky mentally, but it’ll actually make it harder for you to get wet physically.

14. When all else fails, ask your gyno for advice, because you might have low estrogen levels or an immune disorder. You might even be taking a birth control pill that’s messing with your libido. If there’s a physical problem, then she can solve it. TC mark

9 Dirty Sex Stories That Help Me Get Off When My Boyfriend Can’t Come Over

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 07:00 PM PDT


Sometimes I’m in the mood to be “in the mood” but my boyfriend isn’t around. That’s when I stumble over to R/GoneWildStories, where real people talk about their “gone wild” sex and hookup experiences. Here are nine stories I have read just this week. Enjoy, and maybe submit your own? ;)










If You Relate To These 7 Things, You Aren’t ‘Too Emotional’ – You’re An Empath

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 06:00 PM PDT


1. Upsetting images stay with you long after seeing them. Whether it’s as significant as a tragedy you saw on the news, or as common as seeing roadkill on the side of the road, you have a difficult time disconnecting from the pain.

2. You’re moved to tears easily. It’s not something you fear or try to suppress. If your eyes start tingling, you let it happen. It’s a cathartic release.

3. You’re able pick up on tiny changes in energy or body language, which can cause you to overthink situations.

4. You have zero poker face. Not only do you wear your emotions on your sleeve, you wear them all over your face too. There’s no hiding it.

5. It’s not uncommon for you to feel sympathy pains or aches if someone around you is sick. You’ve suddenly felt nauseous if a loved one is under the weather.

6. You have a difficult time being around narcissists. People who lack empathy for others are like aliens to you – you can’t understand how they operate. You assume everyone connects the same way you do. And upon meeting those who don’t, it can be very jarring.

7. You can get overwhelmed in crowds or with tons of people. Because you can absorb the energy levels and mindsets of those around you, it can lead to what some may think of as temper tantrums. That’s not what’s going on. You’re just so exhausted, you need to get away and have your space. TC mark

What Each Myers-Briggs Type Does At Disney World

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 05:00 PM PDT

Thomas Kelley
Thomas Kelley

ENTJ: Lives for anything that's not a ride. Probably enjoyed the Hall of Presidents. Most likely is carrying a fanny pack "because people can steal stuff out of a backpack".

INTP: Completely forgets to eat and winds up getting huffy from low blood sugar in line for Thunder Mountain Railroad. Is mollified after eating $40 worth of chicken strips from a basket shaped like Winnie the Pooh.

ENFP: Takes pictures with all the characters. Somehow even found the super rare characters like Captain Hook. Definitely instagramed a picture of their Dole Whip against Cinderella Castle.

ISTJ: Second most likely type after the ENTJ to have a fanny pack. They filled theirs with granola bars to escape what they insist on calling the park's "price gouging". Are true believers in wristbands and fast passes.

ENTP: Starts out not excited at all but then has a good time. Manages to find the wedding ring in the sidewalk outside The Haunted Mansion.

ENFJ: Is at Disney for the fireworks and parades. They also somehow talked their way into Club 33, the secret Disney bar.

ESTJ: Brings a huge DSLR camera and documents their whole trip in 4K. Surprises their friends with fast passes for the ride with the longest wait.

INFJ: Spends their whole trip in Epcot, trying everything. May also fall in love with one of the guys working in one of the countries. (Most likely either Italy or Canada)

ESTP: Goes on the biggest, scariest ride 100 times. After they've finally burned themselves out, they make their way to their second favorite ride, the Small World ride.

INTJ: Insists on making everyone stop at the big map at the opening of the park and plot out what everyone wants to see and in which order. Only wants to eat at Epcot.

INFP: Acts really chill until someone tries to drag them to something that's not a ride. Is definitely more excited about the log flume than anyone else. Is both shocked and overly emotional that Mr. Toad's Wild Ride isn't in the park anymore.

ESFJ: Finds someone's pass on the ground. Takes immediately to the lost-and-found office. Goes to have tea at the Grand Floridian.

ISFJ: Spends most of their time in the Wild Kingdom. Leaves only on their quest to collect all the pins they can.

ISTP: Loved the Test Track ride, especially the part where you can build a car. Might have slightly scared the people in line ahead of them by debating aloud about whether Walt Disney was part of the Illuminati.

ESFP: Is a bit of a scaredy-cat when it comes to the rides. Goes out to the Main Street Electrical Parade every night.

ISFP: Eats only at the places on Main Street USA. Makes crazy faces at the rollercoaster camera with their friends and actually buys the picture to always remember their trip. TC mark

Here’s The Presidential Debate Drinking Game That Will Absolutely Kill You

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 04:15 PM PDT

Flickr / Rich Girard
Flickr / Rich Girard

Are you ready for tonight’s Presidential debate? Don’t worry, none of us are. Make sure you can’t remember any of it with this dope-ass drinking game.

Take a drink every time:

  • Hillary says “temperament”
  • Hillary mentions Trump’s taxes
  • Hillary mentions some failed Trump business
  • Hillary brings up being the first female President
  • Hillary says “Stronger Together”
  • Hillary gives an answer that is pure boring policy minutia that nobody cares about
  • Trump says “China” or “Mexico”
  • Trump uses more than two superlatives in one sentence
  • Trump says “Believe me”
  • Trump subtly alludes to any Bill Clinton sex scandal
  • Trump says “Crooked Hillary”
  • Trump talks about any of his children or wives
  • Trump dodges a question because he obviously has no f*cking idea what’s going on
  • Either candidate brings up some anecdote of an American to justify their policy position (e.g. Hillary talks about an immigrant who built a business)
  • Anyone at the debate says the phrase “Trump University”
  • Anyone at the debate mentions “Putin”
  • Anyone at the debate says “Benghazi”
  • Anyone at the debate mentions “emails” (stop after 9th drink)

Finish your drink when:

  • Trump makes some vague reference to Hillary’s health
  • Trump uses more than three superlatives in one sentences
  • Trump overtly brings up any Bill Clinton sex scandal
  • Trump tries to use terrorism to court LGBTQ+ people
  • Trump makes an offhand comment about Hillary’s physical appearance
  • Hillary noticeably coughs
  • Hillary brings up Trump’s tax returns for a second time (repeat if necessary)
  • Hillary laughs / brushes off allegations of corruption
  • Anyone at the debate mentions a reason someone is “disqualified to be President”

Finish your bottle when:

  • This debate makes you wish you were drunk
  • You just want to end it all

May the odds ever be in your favor. If you have other rule suggestions, feel free to post them in the comments! TC mark

Disclaimer: We are not liable for any death or injury resulting from playing this game.

35 Automatic Turn-Offs For Alpha Women Who Refuse To Settle

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 04:00 PM PDT

Twenty20, blaireblackmon
Twenty20, blaireblackmon

1. He’s the master of sending mixed signals. One day, he’s totally interested in you. The next day, he completely ignores your messages.

2. He always puts on his music in the car, makes you watch his favorite movie, and visit his favorite restaurant.

3. His actions and his words don’t match up. Sure, he makes golden promises about how he’s going to call you back and show you his new apartment, but he never follows through with them.

4. He doesn’t have a job and isn’t looking for a job.

5. He claims that he’s too busy to see you, instead of rearranging his schedule to find some time to see you.

6. He doesn’t believe in labels. He refuses to call you his girlfriend, or even a fuck buddy, because he doesn’t want you to know where you stand.

7. He talks and talks and talks, without bothering to pause to ask about how your day is going.

8. He refuses to wear condoms, because he doesn’t like the way latex feels against his skin.

9. Every time he passes a reflective surface, he has to stop to fix his hair. And if it rains, he freaks out more than you do about how it’s going to ruin that hair.

10. Sex is all about him. He doesn’t even think about trying to make you orgasm.

11. He doesn’t take care of himself. We’re not just talking about going to the gym. We’re talking about brushing his teeth, trimming his hair, and keeping up with his doctor’s appointments.

12. He checks out other girls, without even bothering to hide the crappy behavior from you.

13. He swears constantly. Hearing the F word every once in a while is hot, but hearing it in every sentence is overkill.

14. He usually wears a wife beater and shorts to your dinner dates.

15. He pays more attention to his phone than to you.

16. You catch him lying about something stupid to impress you.

17. He smokes.

18. He wants you to look exactly the same with and without makeup, because he’s worried about that “false advertisement” crap.

19. He’s always bragging about material items, because owning the new iPhone is his top priority.

20. He gets wasted every single time you see him.

21. He expects you to do something super kinky the very first time that you have sex together.

22. He sends you texts filled with spelling mistakes.

23. He sends you texts with improper grammar.

24. When he visits, he doesn’t bother to pet your dog or your cat, even when they run up to him.

25. He always makes plans with you at the last second, which is usually after dinnertime on a weeknight.

26. He’s lazy. He doesn’t have any goals in life. And he’s not even bothered by his own lack of ambition.

27. He still believes in outdated gender roles, like that you should be better at cooking and he should be better at fixing cars.

28. He never even offers to pay for dinner, even though he has the money to cover it.

29. He accuses you of being on your period when you show the slightest bit of emotion.

30. He’s rude to the waiter, to the bartender, or to you.

31. He sends you dick pics, even though you definitely didn’t ask for them.

32. He asks you for nudes, even though you barely even know him.

33. He refers to one or more of his exes as psychos.

34. He refuses to meet your parents, even though you’ve dated for months.

35. He hates animals. TC mark

23 ‘Unmasculine’ Things That Women Actually Find Really Attractive In Men

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 03:00 PM PDT

The O.C.
The O.C.

1. When something makes a guy laugh so hard that he really, actually giggles.

2. Or when he gets so excited about something that he lets out some kind of unexpected high-pitched noise.

3. When he has incredibly neat, clean handwriting.

4. Or he can write in perfect, beautiful cursive.

5. When he gets really silly and playful around kids.

6. Or puppies.

7. When he puts a lot of effort into creating a thoughtful, homemade gift for you.

8. When he cooks and gets really into it.

9. Or if he’s one hell of a baker. No woman has ever been upset by a man who makes a good pie.

10. When he’s not embarrassed to get upset, or even cry, in front of you.

11. And when he’s not embarrassed to shed happy tears in front of you either – especially when the moment is so sweet and so honest that it almost kills you.

12. When he has a room that is clean and well-kept.

13. Bonus points if it’s actually decorated nicely and he has a real, grownup bed frame.

14. When he openly admits to being insecure about something.

15. When he’s well-groomed.

16. And he uses actual nail clippers to trim his fingernails and toenails because he’s not GROSS.

17. When he wears glasses. And not the cool, hip, black-framed hipster kind. We’re talking the wiry, purely functional ones.

18. Cardigans? Step right up.

19. When he has a really good singing voice.

20. Even if it’s falsetto. Because as JT taught us, falsetto can be sexy.

21. When he finally gives in and watches The Bachelor with you.

22. And then admits that it’s a super fascinating show.

23. When he greatly values the advice of the women in his life (you, his mom, his sisters, his friends, etc), because he understands that women are his equals and that respecting them, listening to them, and learning from them does not make him any less of a man. This one isn’t even close to being ‘unmasculine.’ I just put it in here because I wanted to. Thanks bye. TC mark

17 Reasons Why High School Sweethearts Have The Strongest Relationships

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 02:00 PM PDT


1. You started dating during your most awkward phases. You fell in love in the time of braces, heavy clownish makeup, and and douchey Abercrombie t-shirts. If you were attracted to each other even then, you’re set for life.

2. You’ve gotten to see how far each of you has come. You’ve seen each other graduate high school, head off to college, have no sense of direction for a couple years, kind of figure things out, graduate college, and cautiously step into adulthood. And now you can admire how much progress you’ve each made since you were teenagers.

3. You understand each other so well that sometimes words aren’t even necessary. You’ve known each other for a long time and know the things you have each experienced from adolescence into adulthood. So when one of you is having a hard time, you don’t even have to explain why. The other person just gets it.

4. There’s a solid foundation to fall back on. Every relationship has its ups and downs. And when you guys are in a low point together in which you’re stressed out or fighting a lot, it’s nice to know that you have such a firm basis.

5. That goes for fighting too. Fights and arguments are unavoidable in any relationship. But it’s nice having such a strong history and knowing that, like every other argument, you can work through this one.

6. You know each other’s quirks and “tells.” You know when they’re actually fine, and when they are upset. Because their behaviors and body language are now as familiar to you as breathing.

7. You have an endless amount of shared memories. So when you get to talk about some of the greatest joys you experienced as a ‘kid,’ they understand, because they were right there with you.

8. And the wonderful memories you’ve built together only get you more excited for what’s to come. Looking at your prom photos and reminiscing on how you used to anxiously await meeting up at your lockers just shows that there’s a lifetime of even more special moments ahead.

9. You understand that people change in relationships. You started dating as teenagers – you’re obviously totally different people now than you were then. Being high school sweethearts has taught you that you have to be adaptable in relationships, because people’s personalities and wants and needs will continuously change throughout life.

10. You’re basically Corey and Topanga. And nothing is stronger than that.

11. You’ve probably already made it through the hard parts of fighting to stay together. At some point all couples have to sit down and figure out what they want, where they want this to go, how committed they’re ready to get, etc. You already had to do all that when you went to college and when you entered the real world. So although there’s always going to be plenty to work through and talk through, you’ve already covered a lot of it.

12. ‘High school sweethearts’ is just one of many things you are to each other. You’re also soul mates, best friends, go-to persons for one another, cheerleaders, endless supporters, kindred spirits, partners, etc. These types of bonds don’t come around that often.

13. Your families are basically already family to each other. There’s no more polite exchanges of pleasantries. Your families have known each other for so long that they actually greet each other like old friends.

14. And your loved ones are usually super invested in your relationship. Sounds intense, but it’s actually just great. They’re always happy to support you and celebrate milestones and give you all the encouragement that you need. Because at this point, your significant other is just as much a part of your families’ lives as they are part of yours.

15. You’ve been in the habit, for years, of learning how to balance your relationship with the other parts of your life. You know that you can’t just spend all your time with that one person, so you’ve become an expert at balancing work, friends, and family in your life as well.

16. If you guys have ‘a song,’ it’s probably an awesome throwback. Like ‘Hey There Delilah.’ Or ‘Collide.’ Or something by Lifehouse.

17. They’ve been there for you since the beginning. So you have no trouble trusting that they’ll be there for you through everything else, too. TC mark

41 Examples Of Hauntingly Beautiful Famous Last Words

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 01:00 PM PDT

Paisley Scotland
Paisley Scotland

1. "I love you very much, my dear Beaver."

Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980), to his partner Simone de Beauvoir.

2. "Pardonnez-moi, monsieur. Je ne l'ai pas fait exprès." ("Pardon me, sir. I did not do it on purpose.")

Marie Antoinette (1755-1793), to her executioner, after accidentally stepping on his foot.

3. "Valerie."

T.S. Eliot (1888-1965), whispering the name of his wife.

4. "You are wonderful."

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (1859-1930), to his wife.

5. "Goodnight my kitten."

Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961), to his wife Mary, before committing suicide.

6. "I knew it! I knew it! Born in a hotel room and, goddamn it, dying in a hotel room."

Eugene O'Neill (1888-1953), in a Boston hotel.

7. "I'm bored with it all."

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965).

8. "I must go in, for the fog is rising."

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886).

9. "Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow."

Steve Jobs (1955-2011).

10. "I hope this exit is joyful and I hope never to return."

Frida Kahlo (1907-1954), in her last diary entry.

11. "I am just going outside and may be some time."

Captain Lawrence Oates (1880-1912), before walking into a blizzard during the Terra Nova Expedition.

12. "I don't think they even heard me."

Yukio Mishima (1925-1970), before committing suicide.

13. "Quite the contrary!"

Henrik Ibsen (1828-1906), to his nurse who suggested his health was improving.

14. "I'd like you to give my love to my family and friends."

Ted Bundy (1946-1989), before being executed for murder.

15. "One last drink, please."

Jack Daniel (1846-1911).

16. "Leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub."

Conrad Hilton (1887-1917), in response to being asked if he had any words of wisdom.

17. "Everything is an illusion."

Mata Hari (1876-1917), to her executioner.

18. "Please don't leave me. Please don't leave me."

Chris Farley (1964-1997), to a prostitute in his hotel room.

19. "I'd like to be in hell in time for dinner."

Edward H. Rulloff (1819-1871), convicted serial killer; last person to be hanged in the state of New York.

20. "Love one another."

George Harrison (1943-2001), to his family.

21. "My God, what's happened?"

Princess Diana (1961-1997).

22. "Why do you weep? Did you think I was immortal?"

King Louis XIV (1638-1715).

23. "I'll finally get to see Marilyn."

Joe DiMaggio (1914-1999), about Marilyn Monroe.

24. "I feel certain that I am going mad again. I feel we can't go through another of those terrible times. And I shan't recover this time… I can't go on spoiling your life any longer. I don't think two people could have been happier than we have been."

Virginia Woolf (1882-1941), in her suicide note.

25. "Lord help my poor soul."

Edgar Allen Poe (1809-1849).

26. "Yes, I am."

John Lennon (1940-1980), after being asked by an EMT in the ambulance if he was John Lennon.

27. "Tell Mother, tell Mother, I died for my country… useless… useless."

John Wilkes Booth (1838-1865), after being shot by police for killing Abraham Lincoln.

28. "Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven't said enough!"

Karl Marx (1818-1883), after being asked what his last words were.

29. "Is everyone else alright?"

Robert F. Kennedy (1925-1968), after being shot.

30. "La tristesse durera toujours." ("The sadness will last forever.")

Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890), to his brother Theo, while on his deathbed.

31. "I want nothing but death."

Jane Austen (1775-1817), to her sister Cassandra, who asked if there was anything she wanted.

32. "I am not the least afraid to die."

Charles Darwin (1809-1882).

33. "I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis."

Humphrey Bogart (1899-1957).

34. "Friends applaud, the comedy is finished."

Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827).

35. "Oh, I am not going to die, am I? He will not separate us, we have been so happy."

Charlotte Brontë (1816-1855), to her husband.

36. "Please know I am quite aware of the hazards. Women must try to do things as men have tried. When they fail, their failure must be but a challenge to others."

Amelia Earhart (1897-1937), in the last letter sent to her husband before her flight.

37. "I see black light."

Victor Hugo (1802-1885).

38. "Is it the Fourth?"

Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826).

39. "I love you Sarah. For all eternity, I love you."

James K. Polk (1795-1849).

40. "I have offended God and mankind because my work did not reach the quality it should have."

Leonardo da Vinci (1452-1519).

41. "Either that wallpaper goes, or I do."

Oscar Wilde (1854-1900). TC mark

17 Things Men Just Don’t Understand About Women’s Bodies

Posted: 26 Sep 2016 12:00 PM PDT
Found on AskReddit.

1. PMS cramps feel like you’re scraping the insides out of a pumpkin at Halloween.

"I have used the following phrases to try to explain PMS cramps to my boyfriend, he looks legitimately horrified every time:

• you know what it’s like when you’re scraping the insides out of a pumpkin at Halloween? That’s what my uterus feels like right now.

• it’s kind of like somebody just stabbed me in the lower abdomen with a dull spork. Like one of those disposable plastic ones.

• it’s like my lady parts have come to life and decided to live without me. So they’re trying to cut their way out of my body from the inside….

• you know that sharp pain when you stub your toe? Like really stub your toe? Yeah, it’s kind of like that, but inside.

• that cringy feeling you get from nails on a chalkboard? It’s like that entire sensation, including the chalkboard, except contained inside my uterus.

• imagine there’s a tiny band of angry dwarves living inside your abdomen. Now imagine them trying to pickaxe their way out.

• it feels like there are hands clawing at my insides, but my insides are like weird, fleshy concrete. So they scrape and scrape until they slowly eat away at the walls.

• do you know what it sounds like when you tear a really heavy fabric? It’s kind of like that sound as a feeling.

….I don’t think they really grasp the actual feeling of period cramps, so I like to be descriptive. I think it helps."


2. All the shit that comes out of our vagina.

"All the shit that comes out of our vagina. Like, what the fuck is this shit? Regular discharge. Then it changes during ovulation and it looks like fucking egg whites.

Then you get blood. Looks like a goddamn murder scene.

And sometimes for shits and giggles you get random-ass orange stuff! Or, if life is great, you’ll get an infection and it’ll come out in clumps. Who knows what fucking color it will be like then?

Oh my god. Vaginas are awful. Sometimes I really struggle with understanding how they’re attractive.

/end rant.

Please stop telling me to see a doctor. If I have clumps, I know I have an infection, obviously I will see a doctor. A little bit of blood for a short period time is totally fine if there are no other symptoms and it isn’t frequent. Daily discharge is fucking fine.

Changes in ovulation are expected, and actually tracking them is a real part of Fertility Awareness. Find your chill, please. These all can be things that happen to a woman, even if you haven’t personally experienced the whole list.


3. The terror of period shits.

"Yeah, this is gonna be a period thing. But a lot of men don’t know about period shits. Which is where your cramps cause unearthly diarrhea that smells like nothing you’ve ever smelled before. I don’t understand why it happens, but it does. You wonder why women feel so gross and unsexy during her period, haha.

Also how painful cramps can be. It’s crazy that women with serious cramps suck it up and go out into the world dealing with it. That shit can be insane.

I was confined to my bedroom once. I stumbled off to take a shower and almost fainted. I could hardly move. When I got out I practically crawled back to bed. That’s one of the worst pains I’ve felt.

Also that fucking sanitary products are seen as luxury items by the government so we can’t get them for free. Or more importantly homeless women can’t get them for free. Yet condoms they throw at people."


4. Imagine you have your balls magically enlarged 20 times and then attached to your chest. Not fun!!!

"Boobs are more annoying to us than you think. If you have large boobs especially. when you sit at the table and lean forward they either get squished by the edge or they sit on top of the table which looks just weird. They can seriously give you back problems and finding the right bra is just awful and super expensive. You should look up how much bras cost; it’s not cheap and if you want to change them ones a day you need at least 7 of them, and if you work out not only do you then have to buy extra sports bras but they also jiggle and bounce around which is not only embarrassing and makes you feel awkward but it also hurts. Sleeping on the stomach isn’t fun and on the side they get squished again….Boobs are weird and I have this huge fear of breast cancer so I’m also checking for knots and stuff every time I take a shower. I hear guys say that if they could be a girl for a day they would play with their boobs and masturbate all day long, but they don't think about how annoying and frustrating it can also be. Imagine you have your balls magically enlarged 20 times and then attached to your chest. Not fun!!!"


5. IF YOU DO ANYTHING that remotely affects your vagina, you’re at risk of a yeast infection.

"UTIs and all the shit that comes with our anatomy. IF YOU DO ANYTHING that remotely affects your vagina, you’re at risk of a yeast infection. Don’t pee immediately after sex? UTI. And maybe a yeast infection. Have sex the wrong way? UTI. It’s a bit hot outside? Yeast infection. Sweat a lot, yeast infection. Granted it doesn’t mean you’ll immediately get one, but as someone who frequently gets them, it fucking sucks."


6. There’s no magical button you can push to give us an orgasm.

"How confusing and frustrating our bodies can be. I had an ex that would just get so mad that I couldn’t orgasm. I wanted to, but it’s not like there is some magical button you can push. Also, monthly hormone fluctuations OMG. One day my face is flawless, then a week before my period I break out. My mood gets messed up right before my period and I cry for no reason and eat lots of cereal for two days, then the flood starts and mood is fine. It’s as confusing and shitty for me as it is for you, I promise!"


7. Random boob pains.

"Men have heard horror story after horror story about period cramps, but I feel like they know nothing about the second most painful lady trouble: random boob pains.

You see, period cramps are debilitating, but they’re at least consistent. Just take some Tylenol at that time of the month and most the pain is gone. Boob pains, however, strike at the least expected times. And when they get you, they get you good. I’m an eighteen-year-old girl in perfect health and I’ve been convinced on multiple occasions that I was going into cardiac arrest just because my boobs couldn’t catch a break."


8. Vagina insecurity.

"Vagina insecurity. My vagina doesn’t look like your archetypal porn vagina where the inner lips aren’t visible and are tucked away behind the outer lips. Even though the rational part of me knows that I shouldn’t care, I’m still insecure that my vagina isn’t as attractive to my partner because of what we’re conditioned to like as a society.


9. Periods are just a drag.

"How stressful and involved it can be to have your period… there’s always the worry about bleeding through, having pads/tampons when you’re out, being able to find a bathroom, etc. when I’m on my period, I have to plan my days around that and I am constantly aware and thinking about it. it’s just a drag."


10. People with penises can not even BEGIN to imagine how horrible periods are.

"The fact that periods are taboo….

People with penises can not even BEGIN to imagine how horrible they are. But what really grinds my gears is how easy managing a period would be if we all just treated them like they were a completely normal thing.

Think about it like this—roughly half of the population of the world experiences a week out of the month where blood comes out of their nether regions. So if you are a human person and you know a human woman, chances are they experience periods. So it’s so fucking baffling to me how women are supposed to hide the fact that they’re on their period.

I’m a high-schooler and it’s insanely frustrating to have to sneak out of class hiding a tampon up my sleeve because Mother Nature decided to say ‘fuck you’ in the middle of science. It’s hard to grit your teeth and tell your male friend that you have a stomachache when you’re battling cramps that feel like someone is stabbing you with a blunt knife. Occasionally, you have to plan your entire day around changing out your pads or tampons. And let me tell you, it’s fucking traumatizing when you first get your period. I was 13, a child, and suddenly it was like someone had told me they had just killed someone and I couldn’t tell a single male on the planet. It’s treated like a huge secret.

I wish we treated periods like a bad cold. Something everyone gets once in a while and it’s completely normal to talk about."


11. The physical and emotional horrors of having a miscarriage.

"Having a miscarriage isn’t quick and you usually won’t be admitted to hospital when it happens. The bleeding can last for up to two weeks if you’re one of the ‘lucky’ ones and your body handles the whole thing itself. That’s two weeks of heavy bleeding at home, being reminded constantly of what’s just happened."


12. How birth control can fuck up your life.

"How invasive birth control is on so many real and everyday levels whether it’s the pill, IUD, other implants, shots, etc. It’s not just something you take and forget. It can fuck up your life. Also, how little money goes into research for male birth control."


13. How much of a backache you can get carting your boobs around with you.

"How heavy boobs are and how much of a backache you get carting them about with you."


14. Misogyny in healthcare is killing women.

"Misogyny in healthcare. It’s been well documented, and it is killing women. We get written off as hysterical females even when it comes to presenting with symptoms of cancers, heart attacks—you name it. It doesn’t just affect our reproductive choices, although that is a completely valid issue as well. We are frequently disbelieved when it comes to pain. Accurate mental health diagnoses are difficult to get because again—hysterical female. It really affects all areas of medicine."


15. Being fat as a woman means you’re dehumanized.

"Being fat, as a dude, means you’re desexualized. By societal standards, you won’t be as attractive.

Being fat, as a woman, means you’re dehumanized. By societal standards, you won’t be as attractive, which means your only value is gone, and you’re considered worthless.

A fat man can still be considered a great guy, funny, a hard worker, even strong and powerful if he’s fat like a linebacker. Even sexy, to some people, in a 'bear' type of way.

A fat woman? Pathetic, disgusting land-whale, how dare she go out in public, she should just go ahead and kill herself already."


16. The perils of getting fucked while you’re constipated.

"If you have to poo sex is pretty unpleasant and you don’t often want to tell the guy you’re dating 'Sorry, I’ve been a bit constipated lately, not in the mood' But, when you’ve got a duke in your poop chute—I mean, you’re poop chute is right next to your hoo-hah. Sometimes you can literally feel the guy pushing the poo you’ve been wanting to get out right back inside you—way back up into your guts—and it feels terrible. There’s no way you’re going to get off and you’re wondering if he can feel the poo. It’s very awkward, but hey, your penis is taking up valuable space in there, mk? We appreciate this, but it’s also problematic some of the time. It’s also a problem a lot of women wont feel comfortable discussing with you, so if she’s not in the mood—there’s a lot of reasons why—but it could also be that she hasn’t had a good poo lately and doesn’t feel like having a conversation about how having it shoved further up into her GI will be unpleasant."


17. The horrors of having massive boob hair.

"My boobs have massive boob hair (length of eyebrows) and I have to pluck it monthly and it hurts : ("

nahnahna TC mark