Thought Catalog


42 Amazing Post-It Poems That Were Rescued From The Trash

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 08:31 PM PDT

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TC mark

He Had To Hand His Daughter Over To A Norwegian Billionaire To Pay The Family Debt

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 08:30 PM PDT

@msyrko
@msyrko

Tor kept his arm across Rachel's chest pinning her back in to the seat as the Bentley headed for the M1 and off to his country residence in Hertfordshire.

Unbelieving the feat he had just accomplished and feeling relief, the Norwegian billionaire loosened his bow tie with his free hand and the top button of his evening shirt.

But as he did so, Rachel bent her head and nipped at his hand with her teeth in a futile attempt to free herself. The woman was a wildcat.

"Ow." Tor leaned over her and wagged his finger at her. He narrowed his eyes. "Don't do that again. You need to stop struggling now, Rachel and accept what is happening to you or so help me I will stop this car and throw you over my knee to give you a sound spanking like a child. Do I make myself clear?"

Rachel stared hard at him trying to weigh him up. Then she made the mistake of mocking him with laughter.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Don't think I won't do it. You are not the first woman I have spanked," he said huskily drawing closer to her pale pink lips watching them part as she made a small gasping noise at his words.

He wanted to kiss her, love her tenderly but the anger in the back of his mind kept urging him to treat her coldly and maintain his distance. She was to be fucked at will, always at his service for revenge not to be loved and comforted. Care, consideration and even love were luxuries that had been taken from him long ago and he was damned if he was going to let her have any of them. Besides he wasn't sure how to give love to someone anymore. Only coldness and darkness dwelt in his soul now. The love had been sucked right out and there was no hope of return.

The billionaire glanced up at her eyes. She was breathing hard and for a startling moment he saw the same anger, the same coldness staring back at him. It was his turn to take a breath. The pain was as strong as his own. He frowned wondering what more there was in her past than he had already heard from his security team about her cruel father and the wicked stepmother so eager to see her demise.

Unable to stop himself or comprehend his feelings of concern for the spawn of his enemy, he reached out with his finger and caressed it along her bottom lip wondering if he could ignite a spark that would bring them both back from the dead not even understanding his motivation to do so. He had given up on love a very long time ago. It brought too much pain, loss and loneliness.

As he did so Rachel's eyes darkened and her lips curled in to a deadly smile. He made to move his finger but he was too late. With a sudden quick movement Rachel caught the end of his finger between her teeth and bit down.

Tor grimaced and snatched his finger back.

"Bill, stop the car at the next service station."

Rachel's eyes widened but she said nothing. Two minutes later the car was pulling off the road and Rachel was shuffling uneasily in her seat.

Tor grinned.

"By the time I am finished with spanking your backside sitting down will be painful," he informed her.

The car came to a halt away from the service station building next to some trees and a wood. Thankfully there were not many people about. Tor got out and went around to the other side of the car to retrieve Rachel. He flung the door open to find her panting with anxiety and still sitting still.

"You can't be serious?" she questioned nervously.

"Oh but I am. Get out or I will drag you out."

Rachel folded her arms and sat defiantly. Determined she would learn he now controlled her and her life and with the small part of him that was enjoying the game she was playing, even though he would never admit it to himself, he undid her seatbelt and took her arm. The Norwegian billionaire dragged her out from the car and towards the woods.

He walked briskly forcing her in to a small run to keep up with him and unable to pull away from him. The air was warm and the sky was just surrendering to the darkness when they entered the woods. There was only enough light supplied by the moon to light their way.

"Let me go, let me go."

Tor quickly found a fallen tree and sat down pulling Rachel quickly over his knee. She shrieked as she fell over him.

"This is where you learn just how little I am going to be in tolerating your behaviour, little one," he informed her hearing his Norwegian accent become thicker as he did so.

Bracing his arm over her back to hold her in place, Tor placed his hand on her leg and smoothed it upwards caressing her flesh and the silky red dress as he slid it over her bottom to her waist.

With one hand he tugged at the black lace panties raising his eyes at their skimpiness and the delectable way they framed her plump succulent juicy bottom.

"Very pretty, " he said fingering the lace. "But you won't be needing panties or many clothes for that matter," he continued in a dark velvet tone. "You will always be open and ready for me to take. Your job will be to keep yourself nice and wet for me. If you can't I will employ someone who will be able to keep you ready for me. From now on you will only wear the clothes I allow you to and you will ask permission to wear panties, little one. Now let me see to your spanking. This will do you good," he finished with a small laugh.

"You can't do this."

"Yes I can. You belong to me lock stock and barrel, part of my goods and chattel, if you like," he gave a cruel laugh and used both of his hands to pull down her panties just below the backs of her thighs.

"Don't do this to me," there were tears in her voice now as her hand reached up to cover her bottom and her shame. "What if someone sees?" she let out a sob.

"Then so be it. I am sure they will admire me for taking you in hand when I tell them that you bit me twice," he answered with a playful tone settling her panties at her knees to help trap her over his lap.

Tor pulled Rachel's hands away and turned them upwards behind her back. In one hand he held them to help her keep balance over his knees and to strengthen her feeling of submission and helpless before raising his hand, cupping it ever so slightly and striking her bottom.

Rachel yelped and then howled with the second harder blow to her vulnerable bare bottom. Tor felt himself harden as he watched Rachel's naked bottom jump and quiver with each spank. Power surged through him spurring him on until her bottom was turning pink and her sobbing was loud. Being in control was the only time he felt calm. It wasn't that he was cruel with it or dispassionate it was just something he needed since the beginning of the trauma in his life. It felt safe. The thought made him mindful. He checked his strikes to Rachel's bottom were fair and not harsh, just enough to discipline but not to maim or abuse.

Her bottom was now tingeing with a healthy glowing pink visible in the shining moonlight casting its rays over Rachel's bare bottom. He could feel the tight curls of her pussy bristling against his trouser legs as her body bucked with each blow and he swore he could have detected dampness after the fifth spank which made him feel triumphant.

On the twentieth spank Tor was convinced his message had struck home by the limpness in her body and the gentle crying. His heart leapt suddenly, unexpectedly and a wave of protectiveness engulfed his senses. What was she doing to him? Abruptly he ceased the spanking sparing the backs of her thighs for another time dumbfounded by the feelings she was engendering in him.

The billionaire pulled her panties down and removed them from her body altogether. He tucked them in his pocket and then cupped one buttock with his palm. It was burning. Something made him lean down and kiss it tenderly to calm the heat.

"There, there, sweetheart, all over now," he whispered brushing his lips against her pink flesh once more. "I will take care of you. There is nothing to be afraid of. You are safe."

The words were strange to him yet he felt compelled to say them. Confused he lowered her alluring dress and patted her bottom more disturbed by her discipline than she had been.

He let go of her arms and helped her stand. Her pretty face was tear stained and her bravado had died.

To Tor's surprise his instinct took over once more drawing Rachel in to his arms. Equally to his surprise she clung to him.

"What is happening?" she asked through gentle tears.

"I don't know," he answered truthfully. "You have to trust me. I won't hurt you and I will never force myself on you but this has to be. A debt has to be paid and I have to have release from the past. This is the only way I know how."

"I can't trust you. I don't trust any man."

"Then I will help you. Perhaps we will both find some sort of release from this situation," he told her genuinely hoping for the best. Perhaps she would end his pain.

"I will fight you all the way," she said holding on to him stronger.

"I know. You are more like me than you would probably care to admit."

A while later, Rachel lay on the bed. Her arms were raised about her head with her wrists restrained in black leather cuffs that were tied to the bed by a leather strap fed through a loop down the back of the bed. Her feet were in a similar position and tied together. His staff had carried out his directions to her confinement and the beginning of her submissive training to the letter.

The ache to touch her and trace every soft curve with his fingers was strong. She belonged to him now and with his help she was slowly beginning to accept her situation and his control. She was sleeping lightly turned in her bindings on her side giving him a delicious view of her rosy pink spanked bottom. Softly he cupped a cheek with his hand and smiled when he felt his hand warm against it.

The cuff of his white shirt caressed her side as he position his arm over her and gently gathered up a breast in his hand. Seductively, almost lovingly he squeezed it to waken her and flexed his thumb across the nipple. Rachel was a beautiful creature and every time he looked at her pretty innocent face he felt remorse for his actions but his anger was still strong and outweighed his guilt. She might be his prisoner but she would always be cared for and protected by himself and his staff. No one would hurt her and although she was there to service his needs to pay the family debt he would never force himself upon her or beat her for denying him. She was to receive respect and to be simply cajoled and guided in to her new submissive role, a position she appeared to be starting to find unexpected pleasure in. It enthralled him.

He'd expected her to be horrified she could be aroused from a spanking over his knee for a punishment but to her confusion she had been wet, his staff had reported. He looked down at her pussy at the neat shaven black curls. They were still glistening wet. She hadn't been touched there yet and being bound had cleared intensified her arousal. The ache between her thighs needed to be satisfied. Another smile of satisfaction lit his lips.

Another gentle squeeze to her breast awakened her. She moaned softly and opened her eyes.

"Did you have a good sleep?" he asked gently glancing at his watch.

It was past midnight. But Rachel didn't seem to want to discuss it. She frowned and pouted trying to free herself from her bonds, struggling on the bed. His cock hardened and twitched with arousal at the sight of her reluctant captivity wanting to be inside her riding her in to submission.

"When are you going to let me go? You can't keep me here tied up on this bed forever."

He pinched her nipple and stretched it out idly as he sighed with impatience.

"You will stay here until she realise I am in control and I have your obedience, Rachel. This is hard for you, I get that but it is the way I want it and I will help you accept your new life. It could be very pleasurable for you if you do. I promise you will want for nothing."

"I don't want to be your whore and completely at your service whenever you feel the need to mount me. It's wrong . . . I can't . . ."

"You want to help your father and your family don't you?"

She was tight lipped. Tor traced his finger down her stomach and stroked above her pussy careful not to brush the top of the curls. He watched her chest rise and fall in agitation betraying her arousal at his touch. He couldn't take his eyes from her. To his annoyance she was once more captivating him.

"I need to relieve myself. Untie me," she demanded with a confidence he couldn't help but admire.

Tor smiled and continued his caress.

"No. You will relieve yourself in to a bedpan."

The horror on her face was stark.

"No, no I can't, please," she begged.

Ignoring her pleas he stood up and reached under the bed. The bedpan was there just where he had instructed it to be left. He brought it out and lifted her legs up before she could complain forcing her to raise her bottom in the air. Neatly he placed the bedpan underneath her bottom and firmly pressed her hips down when she refused to lower her body on to it.

Cruelly he sat back down on the bed beside her determined she would learn to respect the power he had over her as her captor and pee when commanded.

"Pee and then we will talk some more," he instructed folding his arms.

"No, no, I can't with you here. What about your assistant? Can't she help me?" Rachel was fretful and blushing with embarrassment at the helpless position she found herself in but he wasn't moving.

"No. Pee."

"I am desperate."

"Do as you are told," he told her calmly. "Learn to obey me."

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Tor watched her wrestle with her need to relieve herself and her wilful determination to keep control. When she finally decided to give in and sob a little because of it she found she couldn't actually pee because she was too tense.

"I can't. It won't come," she said through her tears.

Tor softened his hardened handsome Nordic features and stroked his fingers along the inside of her thigh.

"Let me help you."

"How?"

"Let me touch you. Let me help you come and your muscles will relax and your water will flow," he told her softly.

"But I can't do that . . ."

"Yes you can."

Tor moved his fingers close to her sex this time allowing his fingers to lightly brush the curls at the side. Her face contorted with pain and she strained upwards on her bonds.

"My stomach is cramping. I have to pee," she said distressed. "All right, please help me. Please. I hate you for this."

"Hush. Open your legs as wide as you can get them."

He knew she would find this difficult in the position she had been bound but he wanted to see her straining to accommodate his request and obey him. She moaned with discomfort as she opened her legs.

"Keep them open," he instructed knowing it would be a challenge for her.

Using his index finger he stroked the length of her pussy surprised at the amount of juice he felt already dwelling there.

"You are so wet. I think you are hiding your true feelings from me. Being spanked aroused you." He smiled, "I think discipline is good for you. It will set boundaries and help you respect my authority over you."

Tor listened to the authority in his voice and instead of hearing a man trying to pleasure a woman with his dominance he heard anger behind the words. He closed his eyes with frustration and gentled his touch of her clit as he caressed it back and forth feeling her sex swim. When would the past let him go? Rachel was paying the price for something her father had done and he should be ashamed of himself he was no better.

In honour of her sacrifice he bent his head and kissed the small bud with his lips. He heard Rachel give a small moan of unexpected pleasure and felt his heart melt. She was a beautiful, kind and considerate woman and she tasted sweet. Tor slipped out his tongue and lightly began to lap at her clit, momentarily taking time to tuck the jewel behind his teeth and suck as though it were a milk teat on her breast, cupping her buttocks with his hands to lift her up to him.

The more he sucked and tasted the more he wanted of her. She was fresh, vibrant and pure in his dark sordid little world of torture, pain, loss and fury. Tor's whole frame relaxed as he sank in to the welcoming arms of a new addiction giving pleasure to the captive woman under his protection.

Rachel's hips lifted up in response. Involuntarily she pushed her pussy against his open mouth and bucked with each expert stroke of his tongue. Pleased with her response Tor circled the tip of his tongue around the soft silky entrance of her channel building anticipation, preparing her for his entry.

Rachel moved her hips restlessly in his grip and he held them tighter to hold her in position. He couldn't help but curl his lips with satisfaction and triumph that the tigress was actually feeling out of control and pleasured by him. It made him step up his game. He nudged the tip of his lithe slick tongue just inside the small hall and held it there for a moment. There was frustration in her cries this time and wickedly he made her wait knowing the pain of pleasure was fighting with her need to relieve herself. It was a potent aphrodisiac for them both.

With one hard thrust he buried his tongue inside her as far as it would go. Rachel's hips lifted up and she furiously bucked against him lost. The effect of her sexy body demanding more with her hips, straining on her bonds to free herself from the torment just about drove him crazy. He wanted to be inside her but it was too soon. He needed her to be happy and content she belonged to him, accepting of his rule before they took the next step. He might want to her whore her to pay for her father's crimes but he wondered if something else between them could be taking place. Perhaps fate had other plans for them both? Right now he wanted her to come and to come hard so he could he watch the pleasure ride her face and know that for once in his life he had brought happiness to someone, to Rachel.

Her pants grew louder and rush of silky fluid filled his mouth. Rachel was close. Lifting up he settled her back on the bedpan and quickly replaced his tongue with first one and then two of his fingers, using his thumb to maintain the caress on her clit. He stood and leaned over her watching her helpless pleasure begin to consume her.

"Come for me now, Rachel and let your water flow," he breathed his command in a husky voice.

With a cry, Rachel let go on command and allowed her orgasm to blossom. The sight was breathtaking. Her pretty tense features relaxed and were bathed in a soft pinky glow. Her eyes glazed as though she were possessed by pleasure and stared up at him in wonder making him catch his breath. If he had to say when he first fell in love with Rachel it was this intoxicating moment.

The muscles inside the depths of her vagina tightened and trapped his fingers. He thrust them harder, deeper as her orgasm broke revelling in the feel of being inside her connecting them together. The moment it did her water released and flowed freely over his fingers and hand relieving her pain as it tinkled noisily in to the pan.

"Good girl," he whispered as her climax end and the trickle of water in to the pan ceased.

Tor continued moving his fingers back and forth until the small shudders inside her channel relaxed and every last drop of water had been expelled then slowly he removed his fingers and her panting calmed.

Without a word he walked to the bathroom and retrieved a cleansing wipe which he lovingly dabbed her vagina with to clean her. He returned to dispose of the wipe and took the bedpan away.

Rachel grimaced blushing scarlet as he did so. She fought to turn her face and body away from the sight of him taking the pan away.

"Why does this bother you? It should not. I nursed my bedridden father before he died," he gave a small chuckle. "And believe me, this is not the first time I have made a woman urinate when coming," he said brushing his fingers over her thigh feeling the urge to continue the small cruelty of talking about her perceived shame.

"There is nothing more intoxicating than taking control of a woman's pleasure and the function of her body in doing so. In that moment she is completely in your control, dependent on you to take care of her." He lowered his voice to a soft whisper. "Complete trust must exist. I hope in time this is something we can cultivate between us."

"I am not sure I can ever trust a man who has kidnapped me and is holding me here against my will," she answered defiantly.

He smiled and continued to caress the inside of her thigh amused and undeterred, the predator inside him curling his lip with the thrill of the challenge to bring her to her knees in front of him.

"We will see."

He washed his hands, his mind excitedly dwelling on the seductive image of her coming as he conquered her will. The temptation of curling up in bed with her and holding her softness against him was too tempting. Just for a short while he could let his guard down and take refuge in her. That was the whole point of taking her from Roberts, to steal her for those moments he needed satisfaction and comfort. Isn't that what he had really taken her for?

This Girl Wants To Dump Her BF Because He Cried After She Tried To Force Him Into A Circumcision

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 08:00 PM PDT

@CarsonBroom
@CarsonBroom

You know those REALLY shitty exes where you look back and think, “how the hell did I even date them?!”

I think we’ve found one of those downright awful exes.

Reddit user and certifiable narcissist Madgal87 took to the internet to essentially brag about how poorly she treated her boyfriend. When Madgal87 and her boyfriend first engaged in fun sexy times, Madgal87 realized he wasn’t circumcised. She says she “tried to get used to it,” but just couldn’t, and tried to emotionally blackmail her boyfriend into getting the procedure done.

Here’s her whole story:

via Reddit
via Reddit

According to her, it was even worse that her boyfriend cried after realizing he didn’t want the procedure! “What kind of man cries in public!”

Madgal87 deleted the post after pretty much everyone on the internet called her out on being a downright awful person.

Many people are supposing that this user HAD to be a troll, and I certainly HOPE that is the case. TC mark

6 Ways To Make An Even Better First Impression On A First Date

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 07:30 PM PDT

@olegshagapov
@olegshagapov

Are you going on a first date soon with someone?
And want to know some dating tips to enhance your time together?

It can take only a few seconds for someone to form their first impression of you. And one of the key areas they will base this impression of you …is on how you carry the conversation with them.

Many people get off on the wrong foot when they meet someone new because they don't know how to take advantage of those first few minutes of conversation to make a good impression. They wing it basically. And “hope” for the best. As a result, they are often unsure where to begin and then from there, which direction to go in.

In this article we will take a look at some conversation tips that will go a long way to making a good first impression on a first date.

6 Conversation Tricks For Making A Good First Impression

Below are five effective ways to improve your first date conversation:

  1. Finding somewhere to begin: For a lot of people there is nothing more difficult than getting over that awkward first moment of silence. So how do you pick a topic that will engage someone you just sat down with for the first time? One safe option is always to begin with your current environment. If you are sitting in a restaurant then begin by talking about the restaurant. If you're in a movie theatre then start from there. This is a simple but surefire way to engage your partner in the conversation and find common ground.
  2. Have them share their opinion: After using something concrete to open the conversation the next step is to move into the abstract. Rather than ask questions with objective facts and answers, which risks “Yes”, “No” or "I don't know" as answers …ask about your date's opinions. If you are in a movie theatre then a natural progression is to begin asking about their favourite films or what they think of one of the actor's you are going to see.
  3. Project warmth and acceptance: People sometimes avoid being friendly when they themselves feel insecure. They do this because they worry about coming across as needy and desperate. Those who possess real self-confidence however are unafraid to project warmth and acceptance of others. The result is that people around them feel comfortable and judge them positively. Confidence without this sense of ease just comes across as arrogance. To express confidence remember to express warmth and openness.
  4. Relax and play it cool: People feel best when they are around people who feel good about themselves. When you feel anxious or worried this feeling is communicated to the person you are with and as a result they don' feel comfortable. This discomfort affects their impression of you.
  5. Avoid talking about yourself directly: While most people admire someone successful, they do not want to hear that person talk about themself directly. Regardless of how many good things you can say about yourself and how successful you are it is not a good idea to bring them up yourself if you want to make someone like you. Let the conversation go where it will. Over time your best qualities and success will shine through much brighter than if you had brought it up yourself.
  6. Take advantage of body language science: As mentioned before, expressing your status and success by talking directly about it will not come across well. You can however, use body language to convey these things. Use your body to project openness, warmth, and comfort in actions as simple as opening doors or taking off a jacket. Your date will pick up on these actions unconsciously and feel a sense of comfort and ease.

Its All About How You Make Them Feel

There’s an old saying:

“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.”

People form judgements about others based on the feelings they experienced when they were together. If during the course of your date you make someone feel inadequate or insecure …it will negatively affect their first impression of you.

On the other hand if you make someone feel better about themself then it will reflect positively on you. So don't make the mistake of focusing on yourself and your own feelings during a date, but instead focus on the person you are with and on how to bring out positive feelings in them.

The sign of a good date conversation is not how you feel at the end, but how you made your partner feel. Once you are able to influence and guide your partner's emotional state you can be confident that you will have a great first date with anyone. TC mark

To My Sweet Daughter, Here’s Everything I Want You To Know About Young Men

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 07:00 PM PDT

Caleb Jones
Caleb Jones

My dearest daughter,

One day you will ask me "Daddy, what was the war like?" and I will freeze like a deer caught in the headlights. "How should I answer a question like that?" I wonder. Especially to a young girl, curious about what she's learned in school.

"Daddy was in the war. Both of them. I see his medals in our hallway!" Perhaps this is what you'll tell your teacher. But as you grow into a teenager you'll have more questions, and I imagine I will be somewhat of an enigma at times.

So instead, my dear Adelaide, I will tell you about young men and honor.

When I was a young boy, I was told by other boys that nothing was better than getting one free hand up a girls shirt in the middle of a dark movie theater. It was a strange sentiment because I just wanted her to smile at me and hold my hand. But holding hands was for "fags" they said. Grow a pair and cop a feel.

There is a terrible thing that happens in a young boy's head when confronted by other members of your pack. Like jackals running wild, you do not want to be left alone to hunt, for fear that the pack may turn and devour you. So when they ask you to take down the innocent gazelle, you shyly comply to prove that, you too, are a member of this pack. This tribe.

I wish I could tell you that your father was an honorable man when he was younger, but he was not. He ran with the pack and even became their leader at times. Hunting at night like a rabid wolf or an insatiable vampire. Feeding on those he deemed weak or easy prey. There were even the strong ones he simply viewed as a challenge, and like every vampire trick in the book, I was charming until I left you half dead and drained.

There is a certain swagger young men carry when they're insecure. Perhaps it's why we hunt women sometimes. My swagger disappeared in the wars. Some men will piss themselves. Others cry for their mothers. I begged and begged not to be sent to the front lines.

I will not lie, Adi. Men died, and I was afraid. But some men displayed honor until the moment of their death.

An entire platoon refused to shoot a little girl carrying ammunition to the enemy each day. That decision would cost some their lives. Other men would brave bullets and death to save an injured friend. One held the hand of a fellow soldier and told him over and over it "would be okay " until he passed. It didn't matter he was still being shot at. Some would share their meals with poor farmers.

After the war, I saw honor in different ways from other men who were not in the military. One evening, a group of us sat in a local pub nursing a beer, when one of the men began bragging about the sexual exploits of a friend who was getting away with infidelity. The jeering was reaching a crescendo when a voice boomed over the laughter.

"What a sad excuse for a husband."

The laughter died, and the men stared blankly into their beers for a long moment, refusing to look at the man who had defied them, while he glared, daring them to challenge him.

I do not know what the future of dating will look like for you many years from now or how men will treat you. And I know now, as much as I'd like to, I cannot protect you from all the landmines and jackals running rampant. You will have to learn to face them on your own.

But I can tell you what to look for. Look for honor.

Look for integrity, selflessness, sacrifice, and compassion. Find those who champion justice and fidelity. But above all, seek men who emulate humility and meekness. Do not, as so many others do, be deceived into thinking it is a weakness.

Meekness is strength wrapped in humility, my dear daughter. It is strength under control in a world where so many are out of control.

Do not confuse velvet words and simply holding a door open as honor. Instead, observe how he treats others, your waiter, the homeless, and the marginalized. For if you see how he treats those at their highs and lows, you'll understand how he will treat you during your high and low points.

Heed this wisdom and do not become disillusioned, for honorable men will still break your heart. A dishonorable man will break up with you via text, SnapChat (if that still exists), or simply ignore you. But an honorable man will break your heart face-to-face.

Do not despair, my daughter, for as you read this, you may be tempted to believe that honorable men disappeared in the years before you were born. They still exist. You must search to find them, and that may take many years. In your search, though, you will encounter many men without honor. Do not blame them. For they had fathers who didn't know how to train their sons in the ways in which a man should walk. Many grew up without a male figure to explain what honor and integrity look like. Feel compassion for them, instead. Point them to other men you see acting in honorable ways.

I leave you with this in closing, Adi. When you were born, my heart was yours, and I wanted nothing more than to protect you, kiss your face, and watch you smile. One day, I hope to meet the man who feels the same way.

All my love,

Dad TC mark

10 Simple Tips For Choosing The Right Partner

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 06:31 PM PDT

William Stitt
William Stitt

1. Don’t make choices out of fear:

So many times people either choose a partner or stay with someone in an unhappy relationship predominantly out of some kind of fear. Usually that fear is being alone but fears can vary widely from person to person. It’s often better to be alone and wait for the right person than to make a decision out of fear. Making decisions out of fear leads to confusion, anxiety and a general feeling of something being amiss.

2. Be careful of jumping into a committed relationship right off the bat:

It can be tempting to jump into a committed relationship quickly when you find someone you have a fiery connection with. However, you don’t really know that person yet and you’re getting emotionally invested in someone that you don’t know much about. As time progresses, you may find out things that you really don’t like or that you’re truly not compatible with this person. Because you invested so much emotional energy quickly, this can hurt a lot more than it would have if you had taken time to get to know the person before putting your whole heart in to the relationship. When we’re in the “romantic” stages of the beginning of a relationship, we are often making choices out of lust and fantasy-like projections instead of reality and logic. It’s important to remain grounded and patient when deciding to be seriously committed to someone.

3. Give people a chance that you normally wouldn’t give a chance to:

If I had a dime for every time someone told me they weren’t going to go out with someone because they weren’t their “type,” I’d be a rich woman! Remember attraction can grow the more you get to know a person and their personality. Some people also take a lot of time to get to know and don’t wear their heart on their sleeves. Still waters run deep and you may not get a chance to find that out if you don’t take the time to get to know someone.

4. Throw out your checklist:

Many people have extensive lists of what qualities and traits their ideal partner has to have. If you box yourself in to a checklist you may miss out on some great matches for you. It’s almost impossible to find a perfect checklist partner, and when we think we have found it we throw all caution to the wind and disregard some not so desirable qualities. A great relationship has emotional compatibility. How does the person make you feel as opposed to what does this person look like on paper?

5. Look for qualities that are the foundation of a good partnership, throw the tiny details out:

The qualities of a person that help to build the foundation of a good partnership are: Empathy, integrity, honesty, reliability, kindness and emotional generosity. If you find these qualities in someone, be curious about pursuing it further, even if they may not seem like your type on the surface. Other criteria, like “sense of humor,” “world traveler,” and “good dancer” are nice-to-haves but don’t necessarily have to be there for you to be happy in your relationship.

6. Don’t let lust be your guide:

People have a tendency to put up with a lot of crap from someone they are dating when they feel a magnetic chemistry with them. Magnetic chemistry has a strong power because it isn’t something that happens often. When we find someone we have magnetic chemistry with, not only is it an aphrodisiac that we can’t get enough of but we also confuse it with the right person (e.g., “this must be right if I feel this strongly!”). Magnetic chemistry is great but don’t excuse bad behavior because of it.

7. Don’t confuse an “emotional roller coaster” with being crazy about someone:

When someone isn’t fully emotionally available to us or we don’t know where they stand, it creates a type of anxiety. The anxiety has a way of taking over our brains to the point where our thoughts are all consumed by this person. We’re constantly thinking about where they are and what they are doing. Before we know it, we start planning our lives around them. Maybe you decide to keep your calendar open just so you don’t miss an opportunity to see this person. When the person validates and affirms you, it feels great! On the flip side, when they remove themselves emotionally, ignore, manipulate or berate, it feels like the worst thing in the world. Soon the relationship has turned into a see-saw of high-highs and low-lows, which can make us feel a bit crazy or out of our element. Don’t confuse these type of feelings with love.

8. Find someone you can be yourself around:

This may sound cliched but it’s true. Picking a partner where you feel like you can be 100 percent yourself with no judgment and complete acceptance is a wonderful and liberating feeling. In life it can be difficult to find venues where you can truly be yourself. A relationship should be your safe and comfortable place where you don’t have to keep a mask on.

9. Don’t keep waiting for something to change that obviously won’t:

The longer you stay in a situation that you know is ultimately doomed or doesn’t align with your personal values, the more you block yourself from having the opportunity to meet the right person. Be clear with yourself about what you will and won’t accept and know what your deal-breakers are. Once you become clear on those things, it is easier to make a decision about the fate of a relationship.

10. Have fun!

The less pressure you put on yourself, the happier you are with yourself, and the more at ease you are will create a space to attract the right kind of people to you. Sometimes it takes seeing a lot of what you don’t want to figure out what you do want. Enjoy yourself! TC mark

To All The Girls Who Can’t Sleep At Night

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 06:00 PM PDT

Thought.is <a href="https://www.instagram.com/thought.is/">Thought.is</a>
Thought.is

I understand.

I understand how frustrating it is when you're tired but he's keeping you up because he doesn't care. I understand how hard it is to fight these thoughts from infiltrating your mind. I understand how you keep looking at your phone thinking that tonight is the night when he finally says something, when he finally comes back or when he finally decided to give you the closure you need.

You can't sleep when he's not next to you and you can't sleep when you think he's sleeping next to someone else.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry if things haven't been going your way lately, if your life feels like a huge disappointment, if you feel like God hasn't been answering your prayers. I'm sorry your fears haunt you every night when you try to forget about it all. I'm sorry you got used to being wide awake when everyone else is sleeping because you don't know what tomorrow may bring and because tomorrow is starting to give you anxiety.

I'm sorry your nights are getting darker even when the lights are on.

You're not alone.

You're not the only one who's losing sleep over a guy who doesn't love you back or a guy who broke your heart. You're not the only one who's afraid of what tomorrow may bring and how you're going to face it all by yourself. You're not the only one who keeps fantasizing about scenarios that may never happen just so you could have something to hold on to and you're not the only one who keeps making wishes when it’s 11:11 just in case God is listening.

You're not the only one who looks up and wonder if God is listening, if he cares, hoping that he's working on bringing you a wonderful surprise because you've been patient, because you're tired and because you don't remember what it feels like to sleep at night.

But one day you'll sleep peacefully.

Soon.

Soon, you'll sleep knowing that you're not waiting anymore. Knowing that you're strong enough to face another stormy day. Knowing that some things are just not meant for you, knowing that some questions will never be answered.

Soon, you'll be able to sleep because you've been working hard all day so you can be happy, so you can make your dreams come true, so you can be a better person. Soon, you will realize that sleep is therapeutic and you will not let anyone take that right away from you.

Soon, your nights will not revolve around someone who broke your heart or something you can't control.

Soon, you will rest your heard on the pillow and sleep because you've done your best, because you've tried, because you've prayed and because there's only so much you can do and only so much you can endure.

Soon you will sleep because you will start believing in tomorrow again and you’ll want to wake up for it. TC mark

30 Red Flags You Might Be Dating A Narcissist

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 05:30 PM PDT

Quote Catalog
Quote Catalog

How many red flags do you need in order to run away and save yourself?

One red flag? Ten red flags? How about an army of red flags?

Well, let me give you a few, 30 to be exact; dead give-aways you are dating a Narcissist. By themselves they don't scream "Run for cover" , especially if you have no experience with a narcissist, but if you have half a dozen of these red flags you need to run away as fast as you can and if you can't bring yourself to dump him because you think he is an exception to the rule and you don't believe me; at least slow things down. Time will tell, his mask will drop, that is why he is pushing for commitment, he wants to hook you before you see the real person under the facade. If he is what he says he is, it will show over time and he won't mind waiting. True love does not fade the longer you date, it grows stronger. Do not move in because you don't want to lose him, if he is as sweet as he pretends to be waiting will not be a problem.

* disclaimer: Once again I refer to the narcissist as "he" but these red flags hold true for women also.

So here they are: 30 Red Flags You Are Dating a Narcissist

1. The biggest number one without fail sign of a narcissist is how they sweep you off your feet at the beginning of the relationship. They fall in love very quickly, they have never loved anyone like they love you, and you are perfect in their eyes. They have so many of the same interests, love everything you love, wine and dine you, they can't get enough of you, more than likely it is the most romantic relationship you have ever had.

2. He seems too good to be true. A narcissist is a con artist and when he finds his "target" he morphs into his "Good Self" and becomes the epitome of the perfect lover/partner.

3. He wants to know everything about you, is very interested in learning about your childhood, your hopes and dreams, your past relationships. He will reveal a few of his indiscretions and weaknesses so you feel safe being open and honest with him. He wants to get to know you alright, just not for the reason you think. He is arming his arsenal with ammo for later down the road to use against you. By sharing some of his faults he makes you think he is honest, why would he lie about something insignificant when he was so honest about that?

4. They are seldom alone for long, and will still be in a relationship or just leaving one, they will say the relationship was over long ago but their ex won't let go, they feel responsible for them etc. JC said that when he left one of his ex's she shouldn't have been surprised because they hadn't slept together for months prior. I thought yeah, who wouldn't know the relationship was over if you aren't sleeping together. (That is until he stopped sleeping with me a year or 2 into the relationship and kept telling me he loved me and I was being overly sensitive and paranoid)

5. Appears to make friends easily, but doesn't have any long time friends.

6. "Shows you off" to everyone he knows. Taking you to mutual friends of his ex's, (if possible he will use you are a pawn to hurt his ex.) Quickly takes you to meet the family. Plasters pictures of the two of you all over his Facebook (he knows his ex will be checking his FB and he wants twist the knife in her heart). It is one thing if a guy introduces you to his friends but it is another thing if he purposely shows you off in ways that it will get back to his ex. A decent person does not purposely hurt their ex and if he expects you to participate in vengeful acts against his ex it is a dead give-away that someday you will find yourself in the same boat.

7. Very forceful sexually and wants sex within the first date or two, barely taking no for an answer. I remember our 3rd date and I walked through the door at his place and he immediately tried to get me into bed, I almost walked out but I didn't listen to my "gut" and stayed and we did make love. In the beginning he was highly sexual, wanting sex often, 2-3 times a day everyday.

8. They are either between jobs or just started a new job and quite possibly new to town. They tend to move around a lot, that way they don't have to worry about their past biting them in the ass.

9. They have nothing, except excuses why they have nothing (it is always someone else's fault, i.e.: they left it all with the ex, the ex took it all, or some other hard luck story. (JC told me he had furniture in storage and he just hadn't moved it because he was just attending school and would be moving again in a few months)

10. Their ex's are all paranoid, psycho bitches who falsely accused them of cheating, called him cheap, didn't appreciate all he did for them and even were physically abusive to them. If he has an ex who is calling and distraught over their breakup and he tells you she has fatal attraction, he is trying to get rid of her and you witness him not answering his phone, not returning texts, and he says he is afraid of what she will do, that she is spreading lies about him and stalking him and he is afraid she will tell you lies about him; do NOT assume she is a psycho and sorry she lost him. If all his ex's are psycho bitches think about this, " He is attracted to psycho bitches or he turns women into psycho bitches, either way HE has a problem."

11. In his past relationships, at work, even with his family he is always doing all the work, the only one putting in an effort, he is holding the company together or the relationship.

12. Changes jobs many times.

13. Past accomplishments or experiences that are just a little too far-fetched or too good to be true. To read his resume or hear about his life it all sounds just a little (or a lot) far-fetched. He is larger than life, done so much.

14. If you discuss past relationships and he is asked about fidelity he will tearfully admit to having ONE indiscretion, and it was only because his ex was so jealous and was always "falsely" accusing him anyway and he did it and then felt so bad. (Leaving you to believe he will be faithful with YOU as long as you don't falsely accuse him) Whatever went wrong was not his fault, he was the victim, misunderstood. He might even tearfully admit to hitting his ex, but once again it will be tearfully and he was driven to it by her psychotic rages.

15. He is so good-natured you can't imagine him getting angry about anything and he will tell you how much he hates conflict. (Of course his ex was always causing conflict, she bitched at him incessantly about small stuff and brought up things from the past and that is what drove him away, he is planting the seed; he might as well come right out and say; don't confront me on anything I do because I hate conflict and I will leave you or hit you and some day down the road he will accuse you of being "just like the rest of them")

16. More than likely he appears almost naive and helpless, and makes you feel like you want to take care of him.

17. I felt that he loved me more than I loved him, I almost felt at an unfair advantage.

18. He insisted he wanted to "take care" of me; I made a conscious effort to let my guard down, not be so independent and let him do things for me. It is a HUGE boost to his ego to take an independent self-sufficient woman and make her dependent on him. DO NOT give up your independence, it starts slowly, he will sabotage your vehicle, get you fired, ask you to quit work or go into business with him. Once you lose your job you are dependent on him and it is so much harder to get away.

19. Very early in the relationship he talks in "we" terms, saying things like are "we" going to take the car or the truck (not your car or mine), or let's go back to "our" place, subtle little things that make you a "couple". He talks about the future with you in it, in subtle ways, he might even propose early, but whether or not he proposes he makes it clear that he wants you in his life in the future and is not afraid of commitment.

20. Very early he will do things for you that secure his position in your life, fixing your car, buying memory for your computer, giving you something expensive of his to keep for him, somehow making you indebted to him or get you pregnant, ensuring that you can't just walk away.

21. They will often let a little tid bit of truth slip out but you may miss it if you are not aware. Almost like he is giving you a warning. He was a very attentive lover but told me in past relationships he hadn't worried about the woman and just basically climbed on top and worried about his own satisfaction. (that is the way it became after time with us also, and he only was attentive to my needs if he was trying to win me back)His ex's thought he was unfaithful but he was always faithful, his ex's said he was moody but he seems so easy-going, His ex's called him cheap but he seems so generous. He warned me he was a workaholic and I would have to get angry with him to get him to take time off. (but when I did complain about the hours he put in it would cause a huge fight)

22. Early in the relationship he will ask you to do a "favor" for him or run an errand, maybe even pick up his paycheck for him, something that puts you in the position of his partner or significant other and it makes you feel special that he would ask you. (BIG HOOK, he is testing you)

23. Insists on sleeping snuggled up all night and points it out to you, how he has never been able to sleep wrapped up with someone like that before. In his past relationships they would roll over and go to sleep but with you it is different. He will point out that how people sleep is an indication of how "connected" they are. (He is setting you up for when down the road he punishes you by refusing to come to bed or sleeps on the other side of the bed not touching you all night)

24. He will borrow a small sum of money and pay you right back (proving you can trust him so when he goes for the BIG bucks you won't doubt that he'll pay you back) Usually they are in financial trouble of some kind, all he needs is a little help to get back on his feet. It is always someone else's fault he is broke, he is always on the verge of a windfall.

25. Tests your reaction to situations. ie: We met at the end of November so were entering a very social time of year. Our staff parties were on the same night and we agreed to go to my dinner and then his for the dancing and partying, but we never made it to my party. In fact the weather had turned really bad, a snow storm, and he said he didn't want to drive in it so I called and told work I wouldn't be able to make it. Shortly after I made the call he wanted to drive to the store, but once we were on the road he drove directly to his staff party making it sound like he was surprised the roads weren't as bad as he thought and we might as well drop by his staff party seeing as we were out anyway. (I was not impressed; I was in jeans because I hadn't gotten my party clothes on or any makeup, because I wasn't supposed to be going to a party! He on the other hand was freshly showered, always wore jeans anyway and had a nice shirt on) I told him I didn't want to go, I wasn't dressed for it and he just said I was beautiful as I was and that we wouldn't stay long he just wanted to say hi to a few buddies. We ended up staying most of the night and I felt uncomfortable because I was under dressed and he was the life of the party.

26. His description of relationships with family or friends don't fit what you experience. For example he would say he was really close friends with someone but when I met them they seemed to barely know him. Then we went to his families in Sechelt for New Years Eve, (he had told me he was adopted and had just met his biological family a few years earlier and moved from Sask. To BC to be with them) he had told me how great they were, welcoming, warm and fun-loving people and how much they all loved him. But we got there and I immediately felt an undercurrent, an elephant in the room that no one was really talking about but every one was walking around. There seemed to be distrust of JC, animosity that I couldn't put my finger on; later he told me that his mother had thought I was too clingy and had been jealous. He told me that he used to visit the family every weekend and call his mom several times a day and since meeting me he had stopped and it bothered his mom, but she would get over it. His one full blood sister got drunk and started telling me that JC was a real asshole. I didn't want to hear it, I have never taken what someone says to heart when they are drinking, but I suppose I should have listened.

27. You catch him in lies but he says you "misunderstood" what he said example: During our first few dates he had told me he had a house in Sechelt full of furniture and that is why he had no furniture in his apartment in Ladner. Our first conversation was over the phone and he had told me he was looking at the ocean as we spoke, making it sound like he was in his house. So when we went for New Years I was surprised we were staying at his mother's house. When I said I thought you told me you owed a house in Sechelt he told me that I had misunderstood, that he HAD a rent to own agreement on a house but when he moved to Ladner he gave it up and his furniture was stored in his step-dad's shop. I found out the truth much later; he had rented a house in Sechelt with a couple of other guys and got evicted because he didn't pay the rent, and he had no furniture. He had gotten heavily into Coke, been stealing from the family, was involved with a local married woman who was the town slut and every one in town was talking about it, he was in trouble with the police for excessive noise and racing in town and got his sister into drugs, got fired from the job his step-dad had gotten him and been kicked out of mother and step-dad's house. He had gone to the mainland to a drug rehab and was just starting to rebuild the family relationship. I never would have gone if I would have known all the sordid details, no wonder I felt uncomfortable! I never did see any furniture and later he said it got stolen or something feeble like that.

28. Very early in the relationship you calls you by a pet name, Babe or Baby seems to be a popular choice. JC called me Babe on our second date and I thought it sounded cheesy, but it didn't take long and I loved being called Babe, he said it with a softness to his voice, it gave me butterflies. This has a dual purpose for him, one he doesn't have to remember your name or worry about calling you by the wrong name and two, later in the relationship he will stop calling you Babe and it will cut like a knife and plant insecurity in your heart.

29. If you find yourself thinking, "He has so much potential. All he needs is a good woman to believe in him." RUN!!!!

30. He will say he loves you early in the relationship, he has never met a woman like you, you are different from any woman he has ever known, you are special, he can be himself with you, he thought he was in love before but now he knows what real love feels like. You are soul mates, the yin to his yang. You feel he is your soul mate, you have never felt this kind of connection with someone, no one has ever loved you so completely just the way you are, unconditionally and you are determined to show him how much you love and appreciate him. You cannot believe your good fortune to have met this wonderful man.

Hindsight is always 20/20 and he was being so sweet and I really honestly trusted him implicitly, he had been "honest" about some pretty unflattering things about himself, why would he be honest about that and lie about some other things? So I accepted that I had misunderstood what he had said, or accepted his feeble explanations for discrepancies in his story. TC mark

This Is How I Will Let Go Of You

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 05:00 PM PDT

Zachary Nelson
Zachary Nelson

First, I will gather my thoughts. I will involuntarily relive all of our moments together. I will wrap them in silk linens so they do not break; after all, they’ve always been fragile. I will separate them by the way they make me feel and I will put them deep into the closet under my least favorite sweaters. I will shut the closet door, with minor hesitation only because I have no answers, and somehow the naive parts of me think they are held in the memories I might soon forget.

I will shut the door only because I had a minor glimpse of relief when I remembered that I could reopen it at anytime.

Then, I will let the days pass. I will show up for the sunrise and I will be there for the sunset. I will make a commitment to myself that I will never lay in bed alone past noon; I will get up every morning and I won’t ever stop having an appetite for the day. I will learn how to be alone, and I’ll learn how to paint.

I will paint the loss of you on a canvas that I refuse to hang up for display, but I will convince myself that endings are a piece of art.

I will refuse to dismiss connection, but I will never replace you. I will be open to love because it is you who taught me all about worthiness. I will let go of my anger one day, and maybe the week after that I will let go of my sadness. I will seek to replace all of my hostility with grace. I will forgive myself of all of the things I was simply unable to give to you, and I will forgive you for demanding much of me.

To let go of you I will find freedom in the suffocation of my thoughts. I will learn more, I will see more, and I will count my blessings more.

To let you go I will perseverate on excitement, I will not dwell on anything but my cravings for a better future.

After all of this I will move, leaving all of our moments in the closet of a house I will never go in to again. I will leave my loneliness in the room we once shared because I will find comfort in creating a new space for myself.

Lastly, I will open my mind. I will heal in the presence of survival. I will continue to have seldom nights of chaos, I will let myself be a wreck because God knows ships must crash before parts of them learn how to float on their own.

When I finally let you go everything will be silent, all of your noise will have dissipated and I will feel the voice of nothing in the change that will soon bring me everything.

What I will soon understand is that letting you go is only possible when I let the old parts of me I no longer want to know go, too.

This is not all about you, you see. This is the part of my story where I get to direct my own destiny. This is the part of loss that brings us agony but also brings us everything we need to know about the world and who we want to be.

This is not a departure that I will let kill me, this is a departure that I will let create me. TC mark

22 Tragic Signs Your ‘Almost Boyfriend’ Will Never Become Your Official Boyfriend

Posted: 18 Oct 2016 04:00 PM PDT

Twenty20, edric
Twenty20, edric

1. You two have been texting constantly, but you rarely hang out in person.

2. Every time that you do hang out in person, you end up kissing. But you never have conversations about what all that kissing means.

3. He makes unrealistic plans for your future and says that he’s going to take you to Disney. But he never makes real, concrete plans and says where he’s going to take you for dinner next week.

4. He makes you question your beauty and your overall worth, because he’s always sending you mixed signals.

5. He’s admitted that he just got out of a rough relationship and isn’t really looking for anything serious right now.

6. When you’re with him, his phone doesn’t stop beeping. There are clearly other girls that want his attention.

7. You’re comfortable sexting with him. But if you had a panic attack, you wouldn’t be comfortable texting him and asking him to help calm you down.

8. When he introduces you to his friends, it’s clear that they’ve never heard your name before, because he’s never actually mentioned you.

9. He doesn’t do the little things that boyfriends usually do, like text you to make sure that you got home safe.

10. He flirts with other girls right in front of you. And if you complain about it, he’ll act like it isn’t a big deal, since you two aren’t officially dating.

11. All you two really do is flirt. You never have any real, deep, meaningful conversations. They’re always lighthearted and fun.

12. He’s admitted that he has feelings for you and that he finds you attractive, but he’s never asked you out on an official date. And it doesn’t look like he’s going to anytime soon.

13. For some reason, you’re still surprised whenever his name pops up on your phone.

14. Even though he has money, he never spends any of it on you. He never buys you gifts on holidays or takes you out to dinner (unless Taco Bell counts).

15. He won’t kiss you if anyone else is in the room. He won’t even hold your hand.

16. Whenever he messages you, it’s privately. He never comments on your Instagram pictures or posts on your Facebook wall, because he doesn’t want anyone to know about your almost relationship.

17. He’s happy to hang out with you–unless you ask him to be your plus-one at a wedding or to come over and eat dinner with your parents.

18. He hasn’t uttered the word “relationship,” but he has mentioned “friends with benefits” and “fuck buddies.”

19. Even though you’ve already met his family and feel like they like you, he never invites you over for the holidays.

20. He treats you like you’re his girlfriend, but he doesn’t have the guts to actually call you his girlfriend, because he’s been “hurt in the past.”

21. He posts pictures with other girls and you can’t help but wonder if he flirts with them the same way that he flirts with you.

22. You’re not the only girl in his life that considers him your “almost boyfriend.” TC mark