Thought Catalog

17 Men And Women Confess The Single Most Humiliating Sexual Experience They’ve Ever Had

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 08:00 PM PDT


1. No Idea What He Was Doing

I was drunk the night of and only remembered the direct intercourse. The next day she was telling me about how I had her reverse cowgirl without penetration and was just grabbing her ass while moaning. She said it lasted a solid 15 minutes because she figured I must be enjoying it.


2. The Asshole

This happened about 8 years ago. I was recently single and the break up was rough and I wanted to have a good time, so I decided to have my first ever “booty call” type hookup.

I called up this guy I worked with who had been coming on really strong ever since my breakup and basically asked him to come have a few drinks and stay the night with me. He agreed and seemed excited and even insisted on bringing the drinks and a movie. Everything was fine and things started getting heavy and we moved to my bedroom.

The sex wasn’t fantastic, but it was enough to keep me interested. Well about halfway through we flipped over and I was on top. I bent down to kiss him and he put his hand up and physically stopped my face. Like, smooshed my face with his hand and said, in a genuinely apologetic tone, “Ohhh, sorry. I don’t kiss sluts.”

I was floored and just rolled off of him and asked him to leave. I mean the sex was mediocre to begin with, and lobbing insults at me mid-coitus really kind of dried up the ravine, ya know?

Anyhow, He got upset and didn’t seem to get what the big deal was. It was really embarrassing for me, though. I didn’t hook up with anyone else for almost a year because I couldn’t get that feeling of embarrassment out of my chest every time I thought about sex.


3. In The Closet

Sneak over to my girlfriends house while her family is out and bring over some alcohol. During it her family gets home earlier than expected so I have to jump up and grab the alcohol and dash into her closet. She kicks my clothes under the fucking bed so I’m naked in her closet.

The way her house was set up, her bedroom is connected to the living room and you can see her room/closet easily from the living room couch.

I spent all fucking night in her closet getting drunk while naked. Almost 6 hours. It sucked because my fucking girlfriend eventually fell asleep so I had no way to tell when it was safe to leave.


4. “Sorry, Mom”

We were making out having a good time and since her parents weren’t home we decide to do the deed. So she bends down takes her pants off along with mine and I’m tip in almost about to go in when her mom comes through the door looking for her. It was the worst thing cause she just kinda stared and didn’t look away or close the door. I just said I’m sorry and ran out.


5. Strip Poker

Played Strip Poker as a kid with my friend and his older sister and her friends. I was 12, maybe 13? I suck at poker and was naked first so had to do dares if I lost. One dare was to let my friends sister touch it. I started cumming right away and it got on her. She screamed. pushed me over and started beating me. Good times.


6. A Girl Tries To Comfort Her Sick BF

Me and my boyfriend at the time were fooling around while he was sick, we were both horny and I thought it might make him feel a little better. Well he had recently got into ass play with me and feeling dominant, I went to finger his ass. The moment my finger pushed in liquid diarrhea splattered all over my hand and front.. It was disgusting the smells still in my nose, I was appalled. I puked because the smell and entire situation was just disgusting, puking down his entire front.. Then he puked on me because I had puked on him. We were left in a bed of shit and puke just shocked. I never ran to a shower so fast in my life or stayed in one for so long.


7. A Virgin Gets Laid

The guy thought he was inside of me but nope, not even the tip. He didn’t realize it and just kept moving like he was having the time of his life while I just laid there thinking to myself “how the fuck is he not even realizing he’s not inside of me? Seriously what the fuck. Oh god is it too late now to tell him, isn’t it? Fuck my life” and then preceded to try and not laugh at him/the situation and just let him “finish” the job so I could leave.

Told my friends this story and they still make fun of it and say he was probably a virgin but yeah -50/10 would not recommend.


8. Bad Dog

Right as I was finishing, her dog had explosive diarrhea all over bedroom. She tried getting me to stay, I couldn’t.


9. She Had Options

Last night no matter what I did i couldn’t get hard enough to get any penetration and when I finally did I couldn’t get it in she had to guide me in, maybe it was a sign that it should have been a no go because after we finished she went on to say if another guy wasn’t at work she would have fucked him instead.


10. “That’s It?!”

A couple years ago I was making out with a girl, both of us violently drunk. We headed upstairs to a bathroom, slobbered all over each other for awhile, and then she went down on me. By this point I was damn near incoherent and holding onto the bathroom walls to stay upright. I finally managed to get up enough to put it in her but after only a minute or two of flailing around with a serious floppy, I finished.

Worst part about it, she turns around and looks at me– my pants around my ankles and cross eyed drunk– and says “That’s it?” in a real disgusted tone of voice.


11. Mother Nature Sends Her Regards

Doing the dirty on the floor. After we were finished, we realized the carpet and his dick were saturated with period blood. Fuck mother nature.


12. Condom Dressing Room

The first time I had sex I was really embarrassed because I was still a virgin. I tried putting on the condom and it was too small. Had to put fun times on hold while I went to the pharmacy to grab the right sized condoms. Bought 5 different sizes and played an adult version of Goldilocks and the bears for a while. At least my lady friend thought it was cute…


13. Who Put That Coffee Table There?

Once came home from the bar with a girl and was pretty drunk. We are on the couch in the living just gonna do it there. I get up for something and stumble over my coffee table and into my entertainment center and my TV falls on me. Cut the fuck out of my arm also.

It wasn’t too bad really, didn’t hurt or fuck my TV up. Just was weird because it was more of a “holy shit are you okay!?” fall than a “haha” fall =/

I also can’t count how many times I have drunkenly caused myself, her, or both of us to fall off the bed.


14. Digestive Distress

I’ve farted before and that usually ended up with my girlfriend and I laughing and then continuing, but this time we were intimate and I just couldn’t hold it. It really pissed me off so I just went through it anyway. It wasn’t super loud but the look on her face said otherwise. Afterwards we both mentioned how we were trying to keep focus and she was trying really hard not to laugh. That was a bad week for my digestive system.


15. Insulting Dirty Talk

Her idea of dirty talk was heckling. Took me out of the mood faster than anything else before or since. I guess some people are into that.


16. On Ecstacy

I was tripping on ecstasy before having sex.

NO ONE tells you about the dong shrinkage/hard to get erection effect it actually has, despite it’s reputation as a lovey drug. Apparently it has a vasoconstrictor effect, which basically shrinks blood vessels = shrunken peener and hard to get up; especially if it’s a batch that has amphetamines in it.

So my normally adequate dong got frighteningly tiny and I couldn’t get it up to prove it grows. All I got was a dismissive scoff and the after-action of cuddling into the silkiest blankets I’ve ever felt.


17. Lost Condom

Losing the condom during sex. Inside her.

We clearly hadn’t put the condom on properly and it kind of rolled back onto itself and… detached. Then I had to, well, retrieve it, which was harder than you might expect – and less fun than you might expect, because we were seriously worried that we’d have to go to a hospital to get it out.

I did find it. We did not keep going afterwards.

A few months later, exactly the same thing was a subplot in an episode of ER, so it’s probably not that uncommon…

dlightman_au TC mark

15 Sugary Sweet Things She Wishes You’d Do During Slow, Gentle Sex

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 07:00 PM PDT

Folur's Photography
Folur’s Photography

1. Leave tender little kisses on sensitive areas of her body, like her bare shoulders, her neck, and her back. And make a point to kiss the areas she’s insecure about, like her stomach and thighs, to show her you love every part of her.

2. Remove her clothing piece by piece, admiring every part of her body as it’s revealed to you. Don’t rush. Take your time. Have a miniature make-out session after you remove her shirt, and then again after you remove her skirt, until she’s completely nude.

3. Play with her hair. Tuck strands back behind her ear, smooth them down, and let your fingers linger on the ends of them.

4. Hold her hand while you’re kissing, and continue holding her hand once you’re inside of her. It’ll make everything feel more intimate. It’ll make it feel less like fucking and more like making love.

5. Massage her breasts with your hands and let your thumbs gently graze her nipples. Be gentle. Treat her like she’s a delicate work of art and use slow, soft movements.

6. Don’t ram your cock into her pussy with a sudden, surprising jolt. Slide into her slowly. As slowly as you can. The longer you make her wait, the more she’ll want you.

7. Look into her eyes as you thrust, so she knows you love her as much as you love her body. You don’t have to stare for so long that it becomes creepy. Just make sure you’re more focused on her eyes than on her boobs.

8. Move your fingertips over her skin, from her shoulder down to her wrist, or from her chest down to her stomach. Those light, feathery touches will send shivers down her spine.

9. Whisper into her ear to tell her how beautiful she is and that you’re madly in love with her. Make it clear that there’s no other woman you’d rather be sharing your bed with.

10. Hold her face in your hands as you lean down to kiss her. Stroke her cheeks and run a thumb across her lower lip.

11. When you thrust, remember to do so slowly and gently. You don’t have to move hard and fast in order to enjoy yourselves. Slow and steady wins the race.

12. Reach between her legs and play with her clitoris. Don’t move too quickly or apply too much pressure. Just make small circles as you press your lips against hers.

13. Smile when you want to smile and laugh if you want to laugh. Let her see that you realize you’re blessed to have her with you. That you’re honestly having a great time.

14. If you really want to set the mood, then you should put on soft music or set out a bottle of wine. Or, if you’re a fan of toys, you can even try grabbing a feather and running it across her body to tickle her skin.

15. Once you’ve both had an orgasm, cuddle her while you’re still undressed. The skin-on-skin contact will feel like heaven, so it won’t be long until you fall asleep in each other’s arms. TC mark

12 Foolproof Signs Your Relationship Has Hit A Dead End (And You Need To Accept It)

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 06:00 PM PDT

Ryan Moreno
Ryan Moreno

1. You fight more than you laugh.

Fighting has become your new thing and it's not a good thing. You honestly can't remember the last time you had an enjoyable day together without bickering over something or crying. It's almost hard to remember the last time you were truly happy. Every time you try to touch on an important topic that needs to be discussed you get no where and it also generally turns into a fight.

2. You don't have sex as much (or ever, really).

You nearly stopped having a physical relationship, you almost can't stand to be near each other or look at each other, let alone touch each other. Sex started dying out around the same time you started drifting.

3. You can feel that something isn't right.

You have this little voice in your head telling you it's over, but neither of you can accept it and you don't want to bring it up because you know it will just turn into another fight you don't want to have. You’re sticking around because you feel like it’s better than walking away and being completely on your own.

4. You feel a distance between you.

The same couple that used to be completely obsessed with each other and did everything together can now feel a growing distance between you. It's like when you look at each other you don't even recognize the person either of you have become.

5. You stop spending the night as much.

You start growing apart and you start sleeping back at your apartment again. Maybe you just needed to get away after an argument or maybe you just no longer want to sleep by their side because you need your space. You don't want to wake up next to them, you'd rather wake up alone and clear your thoughts.

6. You find yourself admiring happy couples, a lot.

You look at happy couples on the street and wonder why your relationship isn't like that anymore. You secretly get jealous when you see couples holding hands and laughing together because that used to be you, now you resent them.

7. You start saying you don't believe in love anymore.

Whenever people start questioning you about your relationship or talk about their new fling you saying things like, "just wait till shit hits the fan" or "it's not worth it." You are always throwing out negative connotations when it comes to love lately. You feel done with it.

8. You find yourself crying a lot and feeling sad.

You just don’t feel like yourself lately. You feel torn a lot and it upsets you. You hear a song on the radio and it can just make you break down and cry. You always talk about your relationship and are seeking advice from your friends because you just want to be reassured that things aren't as bad as they seem or try to figure out ways to fix it, but the answers you get usually don't make you feel any better. You know something has to change because you can’t keep living like this.

9. You find a way to bring up your S/O's crappy behavior or a way to bash them a lot more than you used to.

Now you spill all the dirt on the things they do that piss you off, you start complaining about their actions to your friends and you just find yourself thinking about all the ways they let you down. Your relationship has become toxic and you think you know it, but you also aren't sure you want to accept it.

10. You do less together.

You used to always just assume you'd go to a new movie release with your S/O but now that's not the case. You think about going with your friends instead and try to incorporate them back in your life more. You start doing things by yourself and stop asking your S/O to come along because you don’t want to be an inconvenience, or you don’t want them to inconvenience you.

11. You find yourself asking permission now.

You used to just assume, you'd just come over, you'd just bring movies and snacks, you'd start treating their house like yours, but not anymore. Now it's flipped, now you feel like you're walking on eggshells again, asking if you can do something. Seeing if they want to come. It's different, it's not comfortable and you're not sure anymore. You no longer are certain they're going to want to go to an event with you so you have to ask.

12. You are no longer happy.

You try to find happy moment when you're together but you can't. Now it's just constant nagging, annoyances and frustration. You no longer look at them with a passion burning in your eyes, instead your skeptical, you aren't sure you can trust them and you aren't sure what to think. You're torn about a lot and it's tearing you apart. Your emotions are all over the place and you just don't have the confidence in your relationship like you used to and it's breaking your heart. TC mark

Here’s What Every Year Of Your 20s Will Be Like

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 05:00 PM PDT


Age 20.

Congrats! You are no longer a teenager. But, you still feel that way (and your parents won’t treat you any differently). You can’t legally drink yet, so this age is pretty pointless. Luckily, you have little things to worry about at this age! #noresponsibilities

Age 21.

Arguably the most wild and fun year of your twenties. You don’t have too many responsibilities yet and you are now legally allowed to get so drunk that you lose your wallet and puke your guts out the next morning. Turning 21 is exciting as heck and everyone and their mother will be buying you free booze for at least a month after your birthday. Cherish this year guys. (Not that you will remember any of it.)

Age 22.

Besides being able to sing along to ’22’ by Taylor Swift at the top of your lungs when the clock strikes midnight, this year, just like when you turned 20, is pretty uneventful. But unlike turning 20, at the age of 22, you feel a little more lost and a little more scared. Being 22 means more responsibilities are heading your way and YIKES: you are going to be graduating college soon.

Age 23.

Everyone says this is the worst year of your twenties, and I would have to agree. This age is full of questions and full of change. Some of your friends are out partying on weekdays, while others are already settling down with husbands and babies. You honestly don’t know what the f*ck you are doing and wish you were back to being 21 and not remembering anything. P.S- Literally nobody likes you when you’re 23.

Age 24.

Turning 24 is scarier than it seems. You are still young enough to party like a college freshman, but on the other hand, there will be people out there who will tell you to ‘grow up’ and to ‘get your life figured out already’. You still feel 18, the difference is that now, people will judge you for that. Also, your parents are going to kick you out of the house soon.

Age 25.

Turing 25 is sorta cool. You feel like you have finally turned some parts of your life around (kind of). You actually know how to pay your taxes correctly now, and you finally go to a doctor that isn’t your pediatrician! You are still far enough away from your thirties to not freak out about everything quite yet.

Age 26.

26 is the year that you decide to finally wake the hell up and get it together. It is the year you will finally stop taking body shots off of the bartenders bare stomach, and it is the year you will finally decide to do things your way. Turning 26 is terrifying, yes, but it is also pretty gratifying and special. Your early twenties are finally behind you. You’re allowed to act like a true grown up now.

Age 27.

27 is the age where almost everyone you know is getting engaged or is already married. It is the year you attend more baby showers than happy hours. It is the year you realize that you are a ticking time bomb. It is the year where you realize you are closer to 30 than you are closer to 21, and that terrifies you.

Age 28.

28 is the age when you finally know how to dress yourself properly. You know how to cook (at least so you don’t starve) and you know what you want in life. Turning 30 doesn’t freak you out that much anymore. If you are single, you are more positive about it and have faith that your time will come. 28 is the year of a calm and collected you.

Age 29.

You are still technically in your twenties, but you are more than happy to leave them behind you. Turning 29 is a monumental moment for you. You still have the energy of a 25 year old, but actually have most of your shit together. You are more confident in who you are as a human being, and are honestly proud of yourself for surviving this crazy and wild decade. Congratulations, you have survived your twenties. TC mark

11 Women Reveal The Most Batshit Crazy Thing They Have Ever Done During A Break Up

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 04:00 PM PDT


 1. “I literally locked myself in my room for two weeks straight. I wouldn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t go to any of my classes. I just drank bottles upon bottles of red wine and stuffed myself with ice cream my roommate kindly gave me. Everyone thought I was having a mental breakdown.” — Lace, 25

2. “Ok, this sounds super petty, but I drove to his house and egged the shit out of it. Luckily he wasn’t home. But, his mom was. I’ve never been so scared in my life.” — Ashley, 21

3. “Since I didn’t want anyone hearing me sob all through the night, I would just get in my car and sleep in there night after night. I did this for about a month until my friends put together an intervention for me.” — Jasmine, 27

4. “I went to see a medium to see if he could get help me closure from my dead relationship.” — Taylor, 29

5. “I kind of stalked him. I would drive by his house every few days, just to see what he was up to. I also looked at his friend’s snapchats to see where he was going on nights out, and would convince all my friends that we had to go there too.” — Rebecca, 21

6. “I went Carrie Underwood on him. If you don’t get that reference, just listen to ‘Before He Cheats’.” — Milly, 35

7. “I publicly announced to my high school during morning announcements that my ex was a cheating dirt bag. And you can bet I said his full name and who he cheated on me with.” — Athena, 28

8. “I lost my mind for a while there. I would literally just stand outside of house no matter the weather and sob like I was witnessing a death. He eventually called the police on me.” — Lisa, 30

9. “I threw out all his clothing and valuable objects outside and poured gasoline on everything. I then proceeded to light all of his shit on fire. The asshole deserved it.” — Cami, 26

10. “I slept with his identical twin.” — Vicky, 32

11. “I showed up at his house on Halloween dressed like a playboy bunny to win him back. 100% would recommend.”— Chelsea, 23  TC mark

17 Texts I Shouldn’t Have Sent You After We Broke Up

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 03:00 PM PDT


1. I’m fine.

2. Have you watched the new season of BoJack yet?

3. Sorry, I don’t know why I asked you that.

4. Tell your Mom I miss her.

5. My mom still asks about you.

6. Are you downtown right now? I could have sworn I just saw you. That, or you have a secret twin running around.

7. How’ve you been?

8. I saw you on Tinder. Pretty quick to be on there, don’t you think?

9. I listened to our song tonight. I didn’t cry though. Can tears run out?

10. I don’t think I miss you anymore.

11. Okay, that was a lie.

12. Did you get that promotion at work? I’m so, so proud of you.

13. Everything hurts. You’re the only one who ever knew how to make it better.

14. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

15. I still love you.

16. I shouldn’t have said that.

17. I shouldn’t still love you.

You’ve Held On Long Enough; It’s Time To Let Go

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 02:00 PM PDT

bailey foster
bailey foster

Wait for it.

The moment he comes back to you, like you hoped for so many times before. The difference? Now you feel nothing.

Where once before, one singular thought from his precious mind broke through the furthest depths of your heart, you now wait for the familiar feeling to come. The feeling of hope. The hope that this time would be different.

The thought that he finally woke up and decided to change. Change for you. Change for this love. Decided it was worth fighting for. Decided you were worth fighting for.

He feeds off that hope. He feeds off your vulnerability and knows one look, one thought, one touch, and you're back. Back where he wants you. Until he decides to leave again.

He will keep doing this, until one day you realize something. This isn't for you. This isn't love. It never was.

This was lust. And passion. And hope. Above all, it was hope for something great. You held out because you had hope this one was different.

It hurts because you gave him a piece of you. And all you wanted in return was some small piece of him in return, but he never gave it to you. Don't blame yourself, it was never your doing. He wasn't going to give it you because he couldn't give it to anyone.

He was the broken one, not you. Don't let his broken pieces break you. So, wait. That moment will come when you feel nothing.

Then, eventually, with time, you'll be thankful for him. He showed you the person you never want to be. So closed off to the world that he could miss the light right in front of him.

So wait, someone's searching for your light in the midst of all the darkness. TC mark

30 People On What They Wish They Knew Before Losing Their Virginity

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 12:00 PM PDT

Look Catalog
Look Catalog

Responses originally found on R/AskReddit


You do not need to completely unravel a condom before you apply it to your penis.

— amayonazing


Vaginas can be really tight, and if you are a little floppy from nerves or whatever, it’s not going to go in.

— historynerd1865


The importance of stimulating the clitoris.

— NDoilworker


I guess not that I wish I knew but was so surprised by how warm it was, 100% caught me off guard not sure what I was thinking it’d be like

— b8le


I honestly wish I knew that it wasn’t actually a requirement to slap her on the ass.

— kevie3drinks


Don’t feel like you have to last forever.

After she had an orgasm she was done, said it was too sensitive to keep going. Didn’t offer me any assistance with my stuff, so she was sitting in the truck listening to music while I was standing outside whackin’ it in the moonlight next to a cow pasture.

— michaelnpdx


I wish I knew that sex, especially for your first time, isn’t like the movies. There’s going to be clumsy moments, mistakes, awkwardness, etc.

— imseriousdonttouchme


You might feel a super instant attachment to that person, but they might not feel the same way about you.

— frankenboobehs


It’s not as big of a deal as I thought it was. I’m a guy and I lost my virginity at 23. I didn’t tell my partner at the time that I was, but when she found out she fist pumped and said, “Yes! I took a guys virginity!”

— Supersighs


It’s lower than you think.

No, even lower.

— forman98


How messy it can be! The “cuddle puddle” is real, my friends.

— SpehlingAirer


You know how your friends would always tell you it’s okay if you ejaculate within the first 30 sec to 2 minutes of coitus- on your first time. I freaked out when I was at 12 minutes to the point of her cumming/faking and me wanking in the showers. I should have enjoyed the process more. Sorry Pamela

— xkittenpuncher


Sex is a fun, but not exactly life-changing or transcendent experience… there’s no reason to have so many hangups about it.

— loki8481


That the purpose of sex ranges from being an incredibly intimate bonding experience to just a form of fun recreation, and that every person needs to find out for themselves what sex means to them on that continuum.

All the messages about how much you should be having, with what type of person, and how and how much you should be enjoying it are likely bullshit. Just figure it out for yourself.

— survivalothefittest


If you don’t have a condom and she says “it’s okay I take the pill” do NOT proceed. Seriously. It’s not only about getting her pregnant and producing a money destroying hell demon, but also STDs and stuff

— throw-away_catch


My wife and I were both virgins when we got married, I wish I knew on our wedding night that we shouldn’t do it 6 times in 8 hours…. We were both sore for days and only did it like 2 more times during the rest of our honeymoon.

— Hoops_Hops


Not really a moment for me personally, but I wish losing your virginity was less of a big deal. It doesn’t really matter if it wasn’t the best, if you were quite old or quite young, if you didn’t have a relationship, if it wasn’t really what you expected. It isn’t really life changing and even though it was great, the “pressure” to lose your virginity shouldn’t exist.

— imjohnk


The importance of lubrication.

— Idennek


It’s perfectly ok to tell the girl you’re a virgin, DO NOT act like you know wtf you’re doing when you don’t and she does.

— Helterskelter03


Pain is NOT a normal effect of having sex for the first time as a girl. If it hurts, you need to stop and have more foreplay and a partner that respects that and has patience.

Took me a year of laying there in pain waiting until he was finished because I thought it was normal from all the bullshit I’d been told.

— Octopushing


There’s this thing…its called the clitoris…and its kind of a big deal.

— Coogcheese


There is NEVER enough foreplay

— JoshuatTheFool


That the anticipation of the moment makes what is a fairly normal activity frightening. You expect this grand, earth-shattering change and . . . it isn’t that. It’s fun and feels great but it doesn’t bestow knowledge of the universe, unlock new parts of your mind or anything like that.

It’s just a thing you do with someone else. It’s not some grand thing that will forever alter your life. It’s fun, don’t get me wrong, and there are times that it’ll be amazing. But people get so hyped up that they really miss out on the enjoyment of it.

— TDKong55


No, losing your virginity will not instantly improve your charisma and make more girls like you. And yes, all of your friends are lying about how much sex they are having.

— Tjuanthousand


The first time sucks. It’s the most over-hyped thing in the world. It doesn’t matter nearly as much as I thought. Don’t take it too seriously.

— mcSibiss


That it was okay to say no to my boyfriend.

— Rileyriot664


It’ll be disappointing at first, but it’s lack-of-skill disappointing, not is-that-all-there-is disappointing.

— jkh107


Pee afterwards. Holy shit, please pee afterwards. Sex can always cause UTIs, but a sudden increase in sexual activity makes them even more likely. I went from virgin to PIV sex four times a week a few months ago and got an infection that spread to my kidneys and made me feel like death for about two weeks. Cranberry juice will not save you.

— GraybrielReddit


Your dick isn’t just going to go in right away, there’s a little work involved. Also, let her know when you’re about to cum, it’s just polite you idiot.

— TheMysteriousMid


Be unafraid of very clear, direct communication. Your needs, requests, questions etc are meant to be respected, as are your partner’s. Everyone was a virgin at some point, it shouldn’t be stigmatized, so don’t be afraid of saying you are one and asking the questions you need answers to.

— sarawras TC mark

15 Things You’ll Only Understand If You’re A True INFJ

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 11:00 AM PDT

Brooke Shemaria
Brooke Shemaria

INFJs are such difficult people. They live in their inner world, but they also have to deal with life on Earth. Let’s analize them and discover what they actually think and feel.

1. We love and have an affinity for depressing music.
People always tell me that I listen to depressing and sad music. That’s not true. Of course I always pay attention to the lyrics and sometimes it happens to be actually sad…but most of the time INFJs appreciate the calming and understanding sound that comes out of acoustic ballads. Nothing wrong with hip hop or happier songs, but there’s no comparison between pounding drums and a really soft piano. It’s just more compatible with our inner side, kind of sad for others, but mysteriously full of magic.

2. We can also have serious case of resting bitch face.
Sorry, it’s not about you, it’s about us! We are just extremely shy when it happens to meet new people. But I can garantee you if you make the first move we would become a lot more friendly and outgoing.

3. We put a great amount of importance over tidying up.
We simply don’t understand how someone can live happily in their own chaos. We love tidying up, organizing our stuff, keeping our books and notebooks clean. Try to understand us: our brain is such a mess! Let at any rate our bedroom be tidy

4. People are surprised by our sort of unexpected communication skills.
We’re introvert, so no one expects us to have such notable communication skills. People think about introverts like people always sitting aside, alone and lost in our thoughts. But when it comes to telling advices or creating stories, we become the most extroverted people in the world. We can talk for hours, if we are in the right company. Just like we are great writers, we can be amazing talkers too. And, oh oh, we are able to influence you with our open mind and make you change your ideas in a minute.

5. But we can be total couch potatoes.
We kind of love going out with friends…sometimes. But yeah, deep down we prefer our safe home. Nothing wrong with you, guys, but sometimes what we only need is to stay home enjoying our own company. We refill ourselves being alone. It’s an introverted thing, you wouldn’t understand.

6. We always want to be there for others.
We LOVE helping others, we just love it. It makes us feel satysfied, happy and realized. It’s our biggest goal: a world full of peace between people, realized by giving our help. Most of the times you will see us sacrifice ourselves for others. But please, avoid exploit us. We don’t like. No one likes it! We would burn bridges with you in the exact second we understand that you’re taking advantages of us. (see number 9)

7. Our unconditional and forever way of loving others is a huge part of us.
We live in an age where love has lost the importance and long duration it had before. In our point of view, love is totalizing and endless. If we fall in love -and it’s not so easy- we stay in love forever, no matter what the circumstances are. It’as as simple and as complicated as that.

8. We have no time for small talk.
Please don’t talk about weather. We don’t care about weather, we care about galaxies dancing, life in the universe, antique poetry and making ridiculous future plans.

9. We have no problem cutting people out of our lives.
Ok, I said that if we love, we love forever, but what happens when someone break up with us or mistreat us? Well, we would suffer at all. For months, years, maybe for a lifetime. We would beg you to stay at first, then we would cry ourselves to sleep every night, write beautiful sad poems and maybe even get angry. But when we feel it’s over, it’s over. It can happen behind schedule, but who cares? We don’t even hate. We don’t seek for revenge. We just cut bad people out of our life showing massive indifference. Indifference hurts more than hate, just saying. Unconscious revenge, lol.

10. Trends don’t matter to us at all.
You will never see an INFJ loving that movie everyone talks about. Probably, we would hate it. I don’t even know why this happen with us, but it’s so. We’re tormented soul, we can’t adapt.

11. We’re highly intuitive – it’s almost psychic.
I’ll tell you a secret: we see things before they happen! We’re modern Sybils, predicting our future almost every day. We can see if you are sad or have some kind of problems before you can even detect it yourself. If we tell you you’re relationship is going to end soon, please believe it! Our advices are important, don’t underestimate their power: we see above semblance.
No one follow their intuition better than an INFJ. Intuition can’t be wrong. Ever.

12. We have trouble saying what we’re thinking.
Sometimes we’re overwhelmed. Our brain works faster than a heartbeat, we have galaxies inside, we need to help others and we also have to follow our sense. Not really easy to keep, right? Too much of everything runs our mind and sometimes we need a break and we have to break down. Stress and depression are our enemies and we find solace in resting with ourselves for a little bit. That’s why we cut you off sometimes. That’s why we need to stay home and cry. That’s why writing can be helpful, even if our journal those days have no meaning. We don’t talk about our problems, we like to keep them inside and it can be painful in the long term. So wee need to stay away from life for a bit and unload. Plus crying help us relieve stress and bad feelings we don’t need in our lives.

13. We’re the quintessential old soul.
Disco? Lounge bar? Party? No, please. We don’t understand today’s young people entertainement. They’re pointless. We don’t like to get drunk (our mind is kind of naturally drunk), we don’t dance in public and most of all we don’t talk to strangers. So our idea of entertainement in our free time would be reading Shakespeare in front of a cup of tea, maybe listening to the noise of a pouring rain outside, cuddling in our sheets or talking with our best friends about books and aliens. Awww that’s so relaxing!

14. We’re set in our ways and do what we want.
Despite what people think, seeing us so shy and tender, we follow our own paths without letting us be influenced by stuff. We think a lot, remember? Our own mind rules our world.

15. We are our own worst critics.
Like we seek for perfection in our relationships, we also search perfection in ourselves. We’re extremely selective in our lives, we want everything to be in place, we need organization and charme. We always have to find the best way to make others happy, that in reflection makes us happy too. And in an unperfect world…maybe that’s why we’re so conflicted! TC mark

One Day You’re Going To Look Back And Realize Just How Far You Have Come

Posted: 02 Oct 2016 10:00 AM PDT

Zach McCaffree
Zach McCaffree

One day, you're going to wake up and your heart won't be beating out of your chest for all of the wrong reasons. One day you're going to cook breakfast to your favourite song and you're not going to feel like the walls are closing in on you. One day you're going to look in the mirror and you're not going to recognize the person looking back at you, because you changed. You changed, and that is the single greatest reality of moving forward; that is the incredible outcome of surviving the hardest parts of your journey.

And yes, sometimes life is going to kick your teeth in. Sometimes it is going to confuse you, sometimes nothing will make sense, and everything will be messy. But you're going to learn. You're going to fight tooth and nail, and you're going to grow. Slowly but surely, you're going to grow.

You're going to find your people. You're going to stay up until 5am on a random Tuesday and talk about your past with someone who enlivens you. You may even fall in love. You're going to go to concerts that ring truth through your bones and make you feel like your cells are vibrating. You're going to stop and stare at the ocean and you're going to feel so small, yet so fucking big, and you're going to finally, finally, feel like things are falling into place. You're going to be moved by your life. You're going to feel everything all at once — you're going to feel complete.

Trust me when I say that one day it’s going to hit you — that you woke up happy, that you're smiling for no reason, that your hands aren't shaking anymore. One day, you're going to remember what it was like to be you a year ago, or three years ago, or even a week ago, and you're going to be so glad that you fought. You’re going to be so glad that you kept going. TC mark

Read more writing like this in Bianca Sparacino’s book Seeds Planted In Concrete here.